Caught in Chaser Effect

Discussion in 'Reset and Relapse Reports' started by Selix, May 16, 2018.

  1. Selix

    Selix Fapstronaut

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    I threw my 56 day streak away because a woman in social media triggered me so hard that I relapsed over and over again.

    this was at the end of march my longest streak ever since was 16 days, but I also threw that away....

    today I relapsed again and put a freshly build relapse recover plan in motion... did everything on my planlist and the sad part is that I relapsed again... on the same day, that made me really mad

    how the hell can I break the chaser effect? I put up k9 and several layers of anti P protection but somehow I still find leaks and get triggered.

    to break the urge I start playing a very hard game to break the thoughts and then it goes away but somehow it always catches up with me.
     
  2. myspirithurt

    myspirithurt Fapstronaut

    A woman on social media triggered you? Shame on her! On a serious note...you might want to avoid telling yourself that it’s her fault (not sure if you are but your word choice makes me wonder).

    I don’t have a relapse recover plan yet. Would you mind sharing your plan?

    On the bright side, that was a nice streak you had!
     
  3. cleanliving81

    cleanliving81 Fapstronaut

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    Its what you think before you act out , I know from my own experience that its tough and just looking at clothed pics used to set me off . Don't be so hard on yourself look at your reasons for doing this what is motivating you to want to change and review that often.
     
  4. +TenPercent

    +TenPercent Fapstronaut

    Ive been triggered by women (recently a co-worker) and I pretty much spent an entire weekend struggling with intense arousal which eventually ended in a wet dream. And even then, I stayed triggered for several days after. So, I think I understand what you mean when you say that you were triggered by a woman.
    *Of course, the truth is that most likely it really wasn't the woman who triggered you, rather it was something inside of yourself that got triggered.

    My advice is this: Sometime when we get triggered, really triggered, it doesn't go away right away. It will go away, eventually, but you may have to give it time and not feed into it. Ok. You masturbated. It sucks. You lost your streak. That felt awful. (But, now you know how important that streak really was to you). Then, you masturbated again. And again. Even after trying to stop. Keep trying. As long as you keep trying. As long as you keep doing positive actions and taking the suggestions that you find on NoFap, it will get better. Eventually that trigger won't be so bad for you and you will get back on track again.

    Short version: Keep trying. Don't be hard on yourself. You are doing great.
     
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  5. A41:14A

    A41:14A Fapstronaut

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    Great words bud!
     
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  6. bike-wrench

    bike-wrench Fapstronaut

    The chaser may have to run its course. But with K9 and "several layers of anti P protection", you can still get through. Blockers are a good tool, but they are only tools. They can all be hacked, and all of them either let through stuff you don't want, or block stuff you do.

    A good plan includes blockers (sometimes) but doesn't depend on them. Better is the plan that changes you into a person in recovery a person who doesn't crave or need PMO, a person who just isn't about that.

    What's the next right thing to do?
     
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  7. Selix

    Selix Fapstronaut

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    I want to thank for your answers

    I need to find a way to block bing. as you know I depend alot on them. I use k9 to block all P-content and coldturkey for all other sites which have P-content or other explicit sites and social media stuff (twitter is the worst social media for no fapers). a locked google search is also on to block the rest.
    I already tried to manipulate the host file to cut of the connection the the bing server or adding a new blocking list on coldturkey, both didnt work. k9 is out of reach as I forgot the password and intend to keep it that way.

    I will try to include workout and cold showers to break the urges and eventually also the chaser effect.

    ps.: if any computer genius stumbles across this, please help me to block and lock the block on bing. the rest is fine.
     
  8. bravastan

    bravastan Fapstronaut

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    I've also read on websites about stopping with drug addictions that the relapse has multiple stages that even precede the act of relapsing. Try to be aware of early thoughts and weaken judgments about PMO, these are the thoughts you will be feeding and eventually will lead you to the relapse. Anyway, this is my experience. My relapse always starts a few days before I break. When I noticed I could break the habit early on.
     
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  9. bike-wrench

    bike-wrench Fapstronaut

    It can be as simple as letting go of your disciplines.We in the substance-abuse business say that relapse is a process, and the first use is one of the last steps in it. I'm sure it's true for PMO as well.
     

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