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Biggest hurdle I've tried to clear!

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Irish Creme Factory, May 25, 2018.

  1. Irish Creme Factory

    Irish Creme Factory New Fapstronaut

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    Hello everyone,

    I'm 29 years old. And I've finally realized that this is a major issue for myself that I need to change. I've been masturbating since I was around 12. It wasn't a big deal when I was a teenager and a young adult. But I'm starting to notice it's becoming an issue for myself and my SO.

    When I'm doing my thing and watching porn, I can keep and maintain and erection and orgasm every time. And it was the same in the bedroom. But over the past year or so, in the bedroom, I wouldn't be able to keep an erection and I would rarely have an orgasm, and I believe its starting to cause tension between us.

    I've kind of known that I have a little more than mild porn addiction. Considering I was waxing my carrot at least twice a day while watching porn, not to mention browsing various things on reddit and whatnot. And ironically I came across this on reddit. So here I am.

    I know the issue with myself is the masturbation and the porn. And my goal is to only have fun in the bedroom with my SO, and not with "Palma and her five friends". I've overcame other addictions in the past going cold turkey and just telling myself that enough is enough. But this addiction is proving a very difficult challenge. I've brought this to my SO's attention and she is supporting me 100% but I think I'm going to need more than that.

    I'm hoping this site, subreddit, the community here, and my determination will be enough for me to clear this hurdle and start to live and have a much better life without this monkey on my back.

    Honestly I'm excited to actually take the first step in conquering this!
     
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  2. FullHouse3

    FullHouse3 Fapstronaut

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    Welcome! Overcoming any addiction is difficult but you can do it. Try to eleminate as many triggers as possible. The first few days are the most difficult but slowly your urge to use PO and MO will decrease. I also recommend incorporating other positive habits into your life such as working out, eating healthier, learning new things, and having a happier outlook on life. There are plenty of great posts on the forums, and I recommend you check out the “panic button” as well.
     
  3. Hi. Welcome to forum!

    Make sure you crate a personal journal thread in Reboot Logs section and blog there on a regular basis. As well as just generally be active participant in various forum discussions. I recommend this to everybody new here because it's the major thing that helped me when I was first starting. Just lurking on forums, reading and learning is great. But it usually is so much more powerful to engage. It helps to keep us motivated and accountable when we are active part of community. And keeps this in front of our minds so we don't forget about importance of it and slip away in our old habits. Sharing is also therapeutic. This is a major reason why AA meetings work so good. But that was developed before internet era. These days we can get most of the same benefits online through communities like this. So don't underestimate the power of active participation.

    I would also like to suggest you to look into mindfulness meditation. It has helped me personally tremendously to learn how to deal with urges. It takes a while to get good at it and notice results, so you need to be consistent with it, but once you do it's very powerful. It has been used by sages for thousands of years to deal with various issues of the mind. And in recent decades the science is also catching up to what ancient sages have know for centuries. Meditation these days are widely used as very effective tool by psychologists for treating addiction and by neurologists for supporting recovery of the brain. It is a great exercise for the brain the same way as jogging is great exercise for the body. Check out this Ted talk, it gives a good idea of what's it about when it comes to philosophy. As far as practical side of it there is this awesome smartphone app called Headspace for guided meditations to get you started.

    Wish you lot's of strength and success in your reboot journey!
     

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