Beyond The Reboot: Complete Orgasm Cessation?

Discussion in 'Abstinence, Retention, and Sexual Transmutation' started by Davidphd1866, May 31, 2018.

  1. Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

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    For the sake of longevity and overall health, is semen retention through the stoppage of orgasm a worthy goal after a grueling reboot?

    In my case I am well beyond the point of having any children. Could the health benefits of a full cessation of ejaculation outweigh the momentary pleasure of an orgasm?

    Where should we go beyond the reboot?
     
  2. sfmark12

    sfmark12 Fapstronaut

    Well to answer the last question, where we should go beyond our reboot depends on the choices we make now. And I'm definitely sure the health benefits of semen retention are thousand times better than a momentary pleasure of ejaculation.
     
  3. Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for the comment sfmark12. (Mark, I presume) Would it be fair to say that you also wish to continue beyond the reboot? I am impressed with your streak of 92 days. May I ask about your retention experience and goals? I certainly hope to go well beyond a reboot--and a thorough reboot for me has been estimated by others to be in the one to three year range.
     
  4. thanks for posting this question.
    once i reached 90 the first time i really hadnt planned what to
    do beyond that...so foolishly released...thankfully no P or artificial stimulus.

    now ive been reconsidering long term abstinence.
    today is only 67 d no MO.

    would like to hear from others as well about a more long term approach.
     
    Davidphd1866 likes this.
  5. sfmark12

    sfmark12 Fapstronaut

    Well my Retention so far has been amazing. The only time I will release is sex, but I am a virgin and I will continue to abstain from porn and masturbation.
     
  6. Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

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    Thanks for the reply. Would you consider yourself fully "rebooted" at this point? And therefore, would your motivation for no PMO be different now?

    I see my case as having two facets: I have to successfully complete an honest-to-goodness full reboot. (which may take over a year IF I don't stumble) and THEN I need to consider what my sexual life and role will be after that. I feel that very long term abstaining is the best path. And my wife agrees.
     
    Foxislander likes this.
  7. would def not consider myself fully rebooted
    and iam closin in on 10 months P free.
    having used P for 30+ yrs ive still got a ways to go

    motivation has changed since beginning this journey.

    originally it was to just quit PMO but now id like to be continue to improve myself
    in many different areas and accomplish goals etc
     
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  8. WreckTangle

    WreckTangle Fapstronaut

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    I think this is a very personal thing and we will have different experiences with what is best for us. I'm also older and I feel this plays a significant role in it too. I did a lot of research at first, worked hard to change my life and find my way back to healthy intimacy with my wife. I did no PMO for the first two months and then had infrequent O's with my wife. I was ready for it then and felt it helped me progress to a better, much more balanced sex life. I still stay away from PM, but intimacy with my wife is much more than a momentary O for me and very much worth it.

    I did not experience any health benefits from avoiding orgasm, that was simply a necessary part of recovery from PMO addiction and PIED for me.

    But that's just me and my experience with it. I'm sure there are other people like me and I'm also sure there will be people for who long term cessation of ejaculation is a good path. Give it a bunch of thought David and try what you think is best for you. Best of luck with it!
     
    Davidphd1866 likes this.
  9. Vedas_fr

    Vedas_fr Fapstronaut

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    That's a good question. If you are beyong the age of creating a familly, i would definitively say full chastity is the way to go. As far as i am concerned, i know i have troubles if i ejaculate more than once every 15 days, so i don't know how i will handle my future sex life and wife. Also if you are a bit old, the body is less capable of sustaining the constant draining process of semen creation. It will be more painful for you.
     
  10. Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you Vedas. I believe you are correct. Although I do admit that emotionally/intellectually it's far easier to accept the reboot as a way to heal from a lifetime of abuse. Reconciling a chaste lifestyle is more difficult--even though my instincts are telling me that full cessation is the proper way to go.

    Any ideas on how to approach things from a lifestyle perspective?
     
  11. Vedas_fr

    Vedas_fr Fapstronaut

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    Focus on doing constructive things for yourself and others. Witness the sex obsessed mind gradually reduce its grip over you, and compare yourself with others after a year or two. I would also recommend doing fasts and spiritual practices, it will give you a feeling of detachment from this existence. In old age ( i don't know how old you are) i believe it is very good to start letting go of ourselves and of our lifetime. Prepare for the next life, or whatever might come next ;)

    Edit : I see you are 54, so you are not that old, you can still consider having a familly if you really want it. My comment was made believing you were older than 65 yrs old.
     
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  12. Brahmakumar101

    Brahmakumar101 Fapstronaut

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    Definitely. Go for the complete retention. I see you are now 54 and this may be the best decision to take at this time. I myself have made a commitment for a 3 years brahmacharya ( complete physical and mental purity ) for my better future and goals and the thought of not going after those momentary pleasures have now allowed me to enjoy a great level of physical, mental and spiritual freedom. I have always repented after losing semen and the post guilt and depression that follows. I ain't even sure about getting married or even if I do, I plan to practise moderation.

    This may be of help. Do read this. And this article is powerful too.

    Well, there are 7 billion people on the planet and humanity is facing problems at every level. There are so many issues that can align with your skills. There are so many people who struggle for the basic needs. I am sure that once you find a cause bigger than you, the thought of sexaul acts would gradually dimminish until it loses firm over you completely. All the best sir :)
     
  13. Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

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    Fantastic post. Thank you! I looked at both of the links you posted and book marked them for future reference. The second one seemed very practical.

    I do agree that Brahmacharya is a worthy path to take--particularly for me. What I am finding interesting is that my wife also believes that this path is a good one for me. But not for her. She reasons that a woman does not undergo the same life-force draining that a male does. Therefore, she says, that husbands ought to strive to live a clean life of Brahmacharya while wives may pursue a more conventional approach (read: western) to sexuality.

    I can give examples, if needed, of how she is thinking.
     
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  14. Vedas_fr

    Vedas_fr Fapstronaut

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    The reasoning of your wife is not that bad. You should learn non ejaculatory sex to please her once in a while without eejaculating
     
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  15. Love Salvation

    Love Salvation Fapstronaut

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    I read a bit but , your wife needs your intimacy , No pm at all . Release with her.
     
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  16. MarinoBigFan1984

    MarinoBigFan1984 Fapstronaut

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    I was surprised how much not releasing for 83 days didn’t bother me. My last two reboots I also haven’t suffered from blue balls which has made them much easier. I did feel more energetic. I did also notice greater impulse control. Ideally I’d only like to ejaculate and orgasm with a woman. The reboot definitely increased my sensitivity. I do realize now that to have a good sex life I really can’t masturbate much or at all.
     
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  17. Jonny123

    Jonny123 Fapstronaut

    Do you mean to have intercourse without ejaculating? I did that for a year and it was ok. Trying to get back there.
     
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  18. Davidphd1866

    Davidphd1866 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you all for the notes. Please allow me to clarify: My wife feels that allowing me intercourse would inevitably lead to ejaculation. Therefore, she believes that for my best health I should not have it with her. Hugging and affection with close companionship--yes. Intercourse, no.

    But as she feels that the energy/life force drains do not apply in the same way to females, she believes that her ability to follow "western" sexual practices should be allowed and encouraged. While highly controversial, she should be able to have intercourse with others if she desires it.
     
  19. Love Salvation

    Love Salvation Fapstronaut

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    Dude ejaculate in her . She needs it . Stop messing around . I dont care how old you are . Dont let her cheat on you . Cum inside her and warm her up be very intimate and love her . Your life force gets lost when masturbating to yourself not sex
     
  20. Jonny123

    Jonny123 Fapstronaut

    Should you not both be celibate? You can be intimate and avoid ejaculation if that is what you feel is right. Better to work on your marriage than get to a situation where she strays. Hugging intimacy and faithfulness in you both will strengthen your marriage.
     

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