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Started back today after relapse. Good to see all the success stories. Committing to 90 days no PMO hard mode. Sick and tired of being sick and tired!

 

In Day 1 from the power of PMO. I hate to share to much due to my past inability to quit for 1 day. This shit is tough and I want to build time away from it. Step 1 is removing my computer from near my bed. I just want to make it 24 hours. I will share here tomorrow. Very concerned about the powerful urges but committed to 24 hours.

 

Day 2 has started. Happy to have made it 24 hours. Found myself anxious, fearful, and angry. Classic signs of withdrawal. Will continue this thread tomorrow.

 

Starting day 3 with urges fairly strong. Committed to no PMO hard mode for day 3.

 

Day 3 completed and I was able to go to the gym. Urges starting day 4 have been less. Seemed to want to eat sugar compulsively. Knowing this roller coaster should level out with time. Will check in tomorrow.

 

Grateful for day 4 to be complete. When I slow down from work I tend to have the thoughts slip in "what would it matter to look at P." Logically I know this is crazy and understand the urgency to change these thoughts. Acting Out has happened in a split second in the past when I have had these thoughts.

 

Thanks Casey, yep exercise is part of my program and I need to step it up. Good luck on your journey.

 

Day 7 has started and I find myself anxious and struggling with paranoid feelings around work. This disease is trying to get me to escape but committed today not to PMO.

 

Appreciate all the encouragement, completed day 7 into day 8. Keeping the thoughts away from P. Keeping the laptop out of the bed definitely makes a difference.

 

Good day. Keeping on the path starting day 9.

 

Moods have been unpredictable, paranoia continues on this journey of no PMO hard mode. But the thought of returning to PMO is more disturbing. So day 10 has started and all is well.

 

Thanks Awakening, could not do this without help.

 

Made it through a work trip overnight no PMO. Slippery place in the past. Good to start day 11.

 

Good day today. No major urges. Day 11 complete, no PMO hard mode.

 

Tired tonight so posting update 12 days.

 

At the hospital with my dad that is 91 with demintia and Alzheimer's disease. He woke up this morning unable to walk or talk. I know PMO will not make my stress go away and will only make me feel worse. 13 days without PMO today.