Anal Masturbation Addiction

Hey all. So I've been battling life with porn, sex, masturbaion. And so on. I've almost lost my wife because of this. Been married for almost 20 years now. I have been addicted to masturbaion / anal masturbaion since I found out about it. I was like 10 or 11. I'm 35 now. And have children of that age. I really don't want to give up any of the AM. But am open to giving up porn. Women are attractive and I have a hard time not breaking my neck when they cross my path. So I would go home. Daily to take a shower after work. As soon as my pants hit the floor. My penis went sky high. And then the masturbation began. After a while. not even stroking it helped. So I turned to anal. At first it was just my fingers. But after a while my anus began to relax and I found that I am able to stretch it. That's when I decided to purchase toys. And the more I masturbation with them a few times. I found myself buying larger ones. The only thing that I want in my love life is to be accepted for who I am. My wife does not agree with darn near anything I enjoy. I love her and want to make love to her every chance I get. And when she teases and never pleases. I'm kinda forced into taking care of myself. She says that it's the masturbation that pushes her away. I tell her that I wouldn't have to do it if she would help me out. Does anyone know how hard it is to be married and have a super high sex drive? And constantly be shot down because of it? Hell when we where teenagers that's all we did. Now I can't even get her to touch me. Wtf? Any advice

 

Thanks my man. Not exactly sure what to ask. Or really what to do.

 

Just trying to reach out for the sake of a better future