An experiment

abernard · Mar 5, 2018

Hello,

I am 23, I started masturbating very early, before puberty, but I really began to do it everydays at age 12-13, at the same time that I discovered porn.

I may masturbate around 10 times a week, maybe 8 times out of 10 using porn, and never experienced stopping it more than 8-9 days in a row.

I don't feel like this habbit has been urting me very much, quite the opposite to be frank ! I enjoy the act, never feel shame or regret it, I sometimes talk about porn with friends, sharing websites and opinions about pornstars and porn genres, and I has never been a taboo with my girlfriend (we have been dating for 3 years). I know she doesn't feel that this is right, and would rather have me drop the habbit, but there are some other considerations:

Her libido and mine are not naturaly in sinc. While I would enjoy having sex with her 4 times a day, she won't accept it more than once every two days. It also seems like she doesn't like it as much as I do, and don't get orgasms every time (but doesn't complain about it). At first it really hurt my confidence, then we talked a lot about the matter and mutualy agreed that to be a happy couple, I would need to masturbate on my own to "waste" some of my sexual energy in order to have the same level of libido.

I tried to stop masturbating for a week, to see what happens, but my libido went through the roof ! I could't see any female without thinking of them as sexual objects, I felt arosed all the time, walking on the street, or fantasising on my own. I was a terrible experience... It drove me insane.
As a result I decided to get back at masturbation.

Few months passed and I saw an article about how porn is affecting our minds, another about how masturbating was deprieving people from a huge source of energy, I got into buddhism and learnt how they treat masturbation... And I decided to give it an other shot, this time for real.

90 days hard mode, no orgasm. Girlfriend agreed.

So naturaly I have a few questions on my mind...

I quit smoking few years earlier, it was the single most difficult thing I did in my whole like, I wonder if it will be harder, or if it has similarities.

The 7 days I spent not masturbating realy made me feel like an animal, I hope this experience will be different as I am convinced that this state is impermanent now.

Will my libido will ever be in sync whith the girlfriend ? I believe the sexual experiences we had so far have not been fulfilling for any of us... Maybe it will be better after the reboot.

To be honest, what really motivates me is the promise of beeing more energetic ! I can't stand beeing sluggish, and yet it happens so much. I have tried changing my diet, exercicing more, doing meditation, etc. It all worked very well, but maybe I can achieve even higher energy by dropping the masturbation.
As a pianist and a math student, I absolutly need the most energy possible to get the work done every day.

Deleted Account · Mar 5, 2018

abernard said: ↑

I absolutly need the most energy possible to get the work done every day.
Click to expand...

Hey @abernard ,

Very glad you are here. I'm just a normal member. Not a moderator or anything like that.

When I arrived here, I was very confused by the program. So many terms, ideas, different opinions. I was in some ways as overwhelmed with NoFap as I was with pmo.

I found two things that helped me.

First, was reading up on the program and figuring out where to start and how to work my program. The best page is the one with the list of all the resources available.

https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/new-users-list-of-rebooting-resources.50878/

That page explained the program. I read every article and watched all the videos on that page.

Next, was the community. By getting involved, reading people's posts, remembering to "like" the posts, reading the post not only in the forum, but on people's profiles, I found a great group of people.

This is a diverse community. We have religious people and secular ones. There are men and women. People with months of no pmo and those just starting out. As well, there are many different approaches to remove porn from our lives forever.

Keep reading posts and profiles. You will find someone who is telling your own story. Keep posting your own story, someone needs to read it.

Looking forward to reading many more posts from you,

--> L

Deleted Account · Mar 5, 2018

For me NoFap is 1/2 program & 1/2 fellowship.

Click on these people and post a "hello" on their profiles.

I've found that the bricks that hold this community together are cemented with the support of the members of the fellowship.

@CrushPornBeneathYourFeet
@JakeO5
@Arohamystic
@MLMVSS
@Rising Sun !!
@Ready to be healthy
@Brahmacharin
@Struggle Bug
@tet2vd
@Satchi
@BigDawg913
@zakes
@C. J.
@LilD
@kropo82

Look at with whom they exchange messages and you will find more profiles.

So, if you would have found more profiles yourself, why suggest these particular ones as a start? Those relationships started with just saying hello. So, my ESH is that saying hello has kept the fellowship alive for myself.

Looking forward to your success and in seeing you say hello on these profiles,

--> L

Deleted Account · Mar 5, 2018

One of the ways I got involved with the fellowship was by reading some really great journals. Reading other's stories with their victories and even defeats is a big part of my program.

I've included journals from all age groups, spiritual members, religious members, secular members, male and female. You should find journals that help. If not, look around, there are hundreds of others from which to choose. When I say "it works if you work it", reading journals is part of that work.

Once you open a journal, click "Watch Thread" in the upper right of the page to get alerts when new posts are made. Here are just a few:

@Iron Patience - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155794/
---
@ludwig525 - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155658/
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@PatrickR - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/139570/
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@GeeWhizz - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/152127/
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@Sunshadow - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/75108/
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@Tomoya Okazaki - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/143534/
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@Fortitudo - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/144228/
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@Dragonnlife - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/136148/
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@weddingnails - https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/155372/
---

There are many more, and you can discover them on your own. But, these are great places to start.

This is a work in progress. So, if a journal has changed or is no longer active, look around there are some amazing journals on here.

--> L

---

PS - Starting a journal also helped me a great deal.

The journals are listed by age groups on the forum start page. Most members run one journal only. That way both the member and others can go back and look at their journey at a later time.

Hope to read your journal soon. Also, in your personal details you can put a link to your journal. Then, appears under your avatar.

-

Deleted Account · Mar 5, 2018

welcome

abernard · Mar 6, 2018

Thank you for sharing profiles and journals with me, as well as taking the time to welcome me.

You are right that community will be a big help in this adventure.

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An experiment

abernard Fapstronaut

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