Afraid we will not enjoy sex..

Maybe try a different approach? Don't focus on sex, or orgasm, or stamina. Focus on connecting on an intimate level with your partner. Like really connecting, focusing on her, what is right in front of you, don't be in your head. Have eye contact. The rest will follow and probably be better than ever.

 

I think a lot of women wish their partner would have these kind of honest talks with them. That is a lot of what causes the issue with porn in the first place, fear of intimacy. You are right, it could be an awkward talk, for both of you. But hopefully she will see that you are trying to ultimately improve things in your relationship and get closer to her. Maybe you can word it in a way that is less awkward. Like you've seen that M takes some of your sexual energy away from her and you are stopping that but it will mean things might be different in that way for a bit and I'd just let her know upfront what you are worried about. You said she doesn't want the old pattern you guys had so maybe she will be open to something new? I don't know, everyone is different, but I'd hope she'd be open to you trying to improve things. Best of luck to you!

 

I know how you feel... you’re too preoccupied with sex and how you think sex is supposed to be. I am the same way. And the result is that sex became the overwhelming driver in my behavior... and that is not healthy. I have always been worried about my performance... and when I was younger, I would do what you are doing... Pmo before a date so I could be sure I didn’t cum too soon if we ended up having sex.... I would spend the whole date anxious over the possibility of sex... not even an overwhelming desire for it... just anxiety that IF it happened, I wouldn’t be a disappointment.