A new Year's Resolution.

Discussion in 'Women in Reboot' started by Moniq, Jan 10, 2019.

  1. Moniq

    Moniq Fapstronaut

    Hello, this is just a quick post (my very first one).
    Well, I have finally decided to take a plunge and since i find the beginning of a new year somehow inspirational and also I will hit 30 soon, I feel that the time has come to ditch the habit.

    My PMO is rather strong and deep, slowly started at the age of 14 and kept getting stronger and stronger, even through my numerous relationships. At the moment I am single and I feel that this is a good opportunity to reset or reboot myself, I am not certain on terminology here.

    Community here seems to be nice, open and supportive, so perhaps I can join your forces and try to succeed.
    I will post later more.
    Freedom_lover likes this.
  2. Moniq

    Moniq Fapstronaut

    It is my day off today, so I have plenty of time on my hands. And now habits will show. I keep finding my hand in proximity of my nether region for no apparent reason. Well, this is going to be interesting.
    Soccer14 likes this.
  3. Soccer14

    Soccer14 Fapstronaut

    Hi Moniq,

    Welcome to the forum. There are lots of really helpful people and resources here.

    We're all really glad that you've made the decision to make a change for the better and kick the debilitating habit of PMO. I think you've made a good decision to begin your abstinence while you're single. It can be a really difficult process and it's hard to go through if you're starting a relationship. You can use this time to really get to know yourself.

    Yes, days off are tricky. The extra free time makes it easy to fall into bad habits. It's great that you recognize this this early on. Now you just need to learn how to use this information to your advantage. Start by taking notice of your antecedents. Antecedents are the things that happen before we engage in a given behavior. So what normally sets you off? Is it wondering around on the internet, do you do it before you go to bed to help you fall asleep, does seeing someone attractive on the TV lead to google-image searches, which lead to pornographic content? Start to pay attention to these things and start to build habits that make their occurrence less probable.

    If you share with us a little more about yourself and this history of your habit (how it started, how it developed, when you typically do it, how frequently, how long, why you decided to stop, etc.) we can be much more helpful. The more details you share, the more we can relate to and use our own experiences to help you out.

    Without knowing more about you and your experience, I will share this piece of advice that I share with all newbies. What has helped me make the most progress, is avoiding digital images of women as much as possible. It doesn't matter whether they're
    fornicating, simply posing naked, partially clothed, fully clothed, or even not terribly attractive.
    I learned over time that any of these things would trigger my brain to think it was watching porn, and as a result I would experience loss of sleep, anxiety, etc.. So my best advice, especially at first, avoid ANY stimuli which is REMOTELY close to what has in the past been triggering. I found it helpful to limit TV/movie time to natural documentaries and male sporting events.

    The other thing that helped me profoundly, was daily meditation. I won't go into detail unless you're interested, for fear of going off and boring you!

    As a beginner, here are some things to google search or find on the forums here...
    1.) "Rebooting success stories" - You could also just read the forum specifically for that here, on NoFap).
    2.) "What to expect while rebooting from a porn addiction" - Really good stuff here. People will lay out generally what to expect during the first few days, few weeks, few months, etc. It's different for everyone, but this will give you some idea.

    Best of luck!
    Moniq likes this.
  4. Moniq

    Moniq Fapstronaut

    Thank you for your very helpful and insightful post. I am only at the very beginning of the process and certainly I will learn a thing or two about myself. I will be sharing things as I go.
    Freedom_lover likes this.
  5. Retentionman

    Retentionman Fapstronaut

    One day at a time, you can do this if you truly want to change. Zero excuses, the struggle is temporary

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