365-day monk/nun mode, then Karezza

Discussion in 'Women in Reboot' started by EmmyB, Jun 8, 2018.

  1. EmmyB

    EmmyB Fapstronaut

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    Yes, if she's aroused by the situation or caressing her elsewhere, or if you use a lubricant.
     
  2. Jonny123

    Jonny123 Fapstronaut

    Ok _ I meant really that if you have penetrative sex does that not stimulate the clitoris in any case? So you cannot avoid that.
     
  3. EmmyB

    EmmyB Fapstronaut

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    No, if you're careful there's no risk of clitoral stimulation.
     
  4. Jonny123

    Jonny123 Fapstronaut

    I wish you every success @EmmyB. I think to be careful to avoid clitoral stimulation you will need a very understanding man - possibly one who is ok with giving up his own orgasm. I think by staying within these parameters as a couple you could experience deep love and another kind of joy.
    For the meantime distancing yourself from the power of the O is very worthwhile and perhaps will put you in a better position to help your future man in a similar struggle. Good luck!
     
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  5. EmmyB

    EmmyB Fapstronaut

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    Disaster! At the start of the year a really hot guy joined where I work and from time to time I've fantasised about him, despite trying not to. Last night I dreamt of having very energetic sex with him and woke up having a huge climax. I was upset and angry with myself and ended up flicking the bean to comfort myself and get off to sleep. So two orgasms in a few hours.

    As I've committed to a year without orgasm before starting to date, the possibility of one day having a husband and kids has been put back by more than seven months. This is a disaster. I'm so angry with my dirty mind and lack of self control.
     
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  6. GhostWriter

    GhostWriter Fapstronaut

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    @EmmyB,

    Relax. Breathe. In spite of how you feel about it, this isn't a disaster and it isn't the end of the world. Don't you realize that these things happen all the time because you are an imperfect human being? We all are. Please don't be so hard on yourself and please don't beat yourself up over it. These things happen all the time to everyone. And truth be known, deep down inside of a lot of people who pretend they don't ever masturbate, probably do the same type of thing from time to time. Would you say that someone who masturbates once every 7 months has a problem? I wouldn't. Yes, I know you're going through recovery, and that's what makes you different. That's what makes me different. That's what makes us different. But once every 7 months is also what makes us the same as everybody else.

    I hope you find this message as uplifting and as encouraging as it is intended to be.
     
    Last edited: Feb 3, 2019
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  7. Newgirl

    Newgirl Fapstronaut

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    I really admire your motivation and commitment even though I don't 100% agree with forgoing O for the rest of your life as long as you don't overdo it and place it above your husband and his needs I feel I'm ok with it as long as their is a healthy balance. Other than that I do see the great value and need for Karezza as a great tool to cultivate true intimacy and I learned about it thanks to your post. Thanks for sharing! Don't be so hard on yourself about your relapse you can bounce back and start all over. Stay happy and optimistic :)
     
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  8. Jonny123

    Jonny123 Fapstronaut

    I am so sorry to hear about this @EmmyB - but the others are right - you really should not be too hard on yourself. Two orgasms in 7 months is not much. I know you wish to eliminate them but this is an excellent start.
    You cannot control your dreams. What you can do is to re-double your efforts to stop masturbating. You say you comforted yourself after the climax. Maybe you could have got up and diverted yourself to another activity Or just folded you arms across your chest and concentrated on calming your breathing down. One thing you need to be very vigilant about now is the "chaser effect". Having experienced a huge climax your body will want more. Resolve never again to touch yourself down there in that way. Good luck!
     
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