30 days and beyond

Okay I've gone no porn for 30 days. Here's my experience:

My goal is really no porn for life. Jerking off to other people having sex is pathetic lil' bitch behavior. Porn really does negatively affect my self esteem, confidence, vitality, etc. So it had to go.

My improved sex life includes sex (penis in buhgina) and jerking off without porn (thinking about girls I like). These are both good things for me. An improved sex life also includes somewhat limited fap and nutting... Ideally I'll nut 1-2 times a week with a girl, but if not with a girl nut 1-2 times a week fapping. For me a good sex life includes the pleasure of sex and orgasm, plus the pleasure of strong discipline and retention. But not retaining my nut endlessly like some guys. The big discipline skill is being able to turn it on and off... that means after I bust a nut, not going on a jerk off binge or something. This is something I've been able to do.

In this 30 days I got laid 3 times with two different girls and nutted twice. Sorry Fapstronauts that can't get laid and can't get a girlfriend... sex is actually part of my recovery story lol. that's the whole point for me, having a satisfying sex life. I sometimes catch grief from guys that can't get laid... for "objectifying women" or "using girls" but it is totally possible to find girls to have sex with in uncommitted relationships without lying or manipulating. It's just that guys that can't get one girl and go years without any sex get upset and accuse me of breaking the rules for having sex with multiple girls. I mean I have one consistent FWB that I've been seeing 2-3 times a month. She's really cool and likes sex. She's 24 and really exploring her vagina for the first time, or rather having it explored by me The other girl I met when she was on vacation and she's in an open relationship. Hot yoga teacher with a perfect yoga butt. It was awesome to meet her.

Truthfully the open relationship is the direction I'm heading in. the more honest I get about my actually sexuality the more honest I am about what I really want. What I want in my sex life is consistency and variety. I want consistent sex with a girl in a committed open relationship, plus the variety that comes with partner swapping or just having a side piece lol. And I'm not possessive and or jealous about my girl getting fucked by other guys. Sex is a good thing to me. So yeah, in terms of committed relationships I won't accept anything that is not partner swapping/open.

I can catch some grief for having and wanting to have multiple partners from the religious guys or from some of the celibate guys who can't get a girl at all. I got a lot of respect for the religious guys. I have different beliefs on spirituality and God than these guys but I the religious peeps are good peeps. And I feel really bad for guys who are involuntary celibate (probs a lot of guys here on Nofap)... they really just need to learn how to talk to girls and go on dates and stuff). But whatever, I'm sex positive. And I know I'm getting closer to fining my open relationship girl. Believe it or not there are actually girls out there who enjoy sex and want to have sex with multiple men. And they do this willingly and consensually. (once again this upsets guys who can't get one girl because these girls never "pick them")

The last thing is that 30 days or 90 days or whatever day really means nothing if I go back to porn. So really today is no different than any other day. And really 30 days without porn is just a beginning. In the past before I found NoFap, I've gone a lot longer without porn but never really recognized it as a problem so I would watch it again. I'm definitely never going back. The big incentive for me is building the sex life that I want.

So right now I'm back to retention... I'm saving my nut until the 30th when my FWB has invited me to visit her. That's the great thing about having a lover and a sex life... my retention period has an expiration date. So I enjoy the benefits and discipline of retention but also the benefits of getting to nut on her amazing rack. The countdown is on.

Good luck on your no porn journey! No porn for life!