28Y male, surgery resident struggling for PMO/Phone Sex for 14 years.

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Seeking Beautiful Life, Oct 11, 2018.

  1. Seeking Beautiful Life

    Seeking Beautiful Life Fapstronaut

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    Hello,
    This is M, 28 year male, medical school graduate 5 years ago, currently a surgery resident.
    I have always been known to be a good person by my surrounding people, they expected me to be a very known doctor in the future.

    My memory goes back to my starting puberty "may be I was 14" when somehow I knew how to masturbate. Through slow connections I managed to get to images. afterwards, accidentally I have found about 30 porn movies on the computer "belongs to someone in family". then I could predict the password to get to sex-featured channels. Lingerie/fashion magazines were starting point too.
    My parents were usually at work most of time. So, I had a very long free time that feeds my habit a lot.

    Years later, I get into medical school, then I had to move to another city to go to school. I had a very long hours after school living alone. I have spent a lot of time masturbating, watching porn using cellular data, so I have paid a lot of time, money and effort to masturbate.
    Through time, I learnt how to make sex phones to girls. I have paid a lot for this. I spent a lot of time going out to send them money.
    This affected my performance in school.

    Sometimes, P/M helped me to pass through difficult times.

    I have graduated then I started working as a surgical resident since 2015. I spent about half my salary on Internet charges for Porn, Sex Phones. I talked a lot to prostitutes through phone for voice/video sexy chatting. I am very afraid to get a have real sex with a prostitute.

    I am Muslim, so according to my religion I couldn't have sex outside marriage. I am 28. I never had a real sex until now. Sexual desires are sometimes overwhelming.

    Even my ritual prays I don't do regularly due to porn.

    I tried many many times to stop. Do you know how anxiety affects me/ worry killing me?

    I am trying to restoring my life.

    Sincerely,
    M. 28Y male
     
  2. Seeking Beautiful Life

    Seeking Beautiful Life Fapstronaut

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    I will keep this my Journal.
    Last Masturbation on Porn with Phone Voice/Video chatting with a prostitute was today 11OCT2018 4:00 pm GMT.
     
    Captiandoom likes this.
  3. Captiandoom

    Captiandoom Fapstronaut

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    Hi!

    It's really good that you've joined the forum! Well done! Your story sounds really similar to a lot of other people's stories. This place is great for helping to get better, so make sure to talk to people and help them too!

    If you'd like to read more about how porn affects you then I'd recommend "your brain on porn" it has some really useful information and also has some scientific parts that I'm sure you'll understand more than I did!

    Good luck!
     

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