143 Days no PMO then Reset - still winning!

OK a quick back ground to my journey so far, 45 year old first attempt at Nofap since my teens and i managed a 143 days no PMO hard mode.

At 130 odd days i hit a really bad patch, im not sure its related to no PMO or its was some medication and life events taking place most likely a culmination of things, but i made a conscious decision to break my streak.

I needed to know if things where still working downstairs after some serious flat lining and i needed to release a huge amount on mental tension (mental clarity low and hard to talk) and messing with my medication was not really an option and not thought to be the cause.

So i performed a reset and i am so glad i did, i know the purest on here say dont do it but for me it made a huge difference and has got my mind back focused again.

I now feel empowered even more, my tensions have reduced enormously, i also know that everything is working fine downstairs. I do not feel any need to look at P not in the slightest and i have not felt any depression or deflation after the event, something i was quite worried about.

So i just wanted to say that if you do reset do not feel guilty, its part of the journey and sometimes you do need to do it. In my case i was well down the rd to recovery and over the worst, my reset was not look at porn or driven by temptation, it was a conscious decision for other needs and not headonism or dopamine drive pleasure.

Trying to suppress endlessly lifes greatest pleasure and drive is not the goal, its all about getting ones feeling under control and living and making decision based on whats right and wrong and not being driven by temptation and the need to feel in a state of pleasure or emotionally cut off. Dealing with every day emotions and feeling them not blocking them out is my goal and im well and truly a much better person for doing this already, just in this short space of time.

So dont give up guys and dont feel bad if the streak ends, its all part of the journey to the new better you, i can speak first hand at it now (excuse the the pun)

 

You got the sparkle in your again brother, keep it up good times coming with a real girl im sure. Thats my next goal to find myself a GF

 

You hit the nail on the head with this comment, thats why i really struggled with myself to bring myself to do it, but i am glad that i did, its not a test of endless will power but a case of letting go of that dirty habit and putting our energies into relationships.

Without doubt i already feel much much better and more relaxed that ive gotten that out of the way, the fear of rushing back to M&P again is now removed after this first real test.