Comments on Profile Post by joarev85

You are the better one, by looking away you gain so much more; purity in mind and thought, your good health, your happiness, whereas those who fall into the trap of those "softcore" triggers lose it all. Remember, it isn't the PMOer that ever gained anything, he always lost everything to addiction, it is you; the non-PMOer (someone who is abstinent from that filth) who lives a Full and happy life.

There are triggers aplenty all around us, usually the media tries to use supra normal (larger than life) stimuli, via bright colours, sounds, strategic camera work, or mixing the various sides of sensuality (touch, sound, smell, sight) with the tired old tropes of "orgasm is the peak of bliss". It isn't, that is a blatant lie of society as a whole that we are fed since quite young.

They do this because biologically and evolutionarily, we are wired to react to stuff related to sex more promptly than to other stimuli (since that is how we reproduce and survive). But their exploitation of something so primal within us can be overcome with knowledge and if we can point out to ourselves that we are being duped by all this larger than life stimuli. "You can't fool all the people all the time" :)

It then becomes a choice to let ourselves be fooled for life, or resist (only in the short term) the withdrawal pangs of PMO addiction recovery (about 3 weeks) and in the meantime rewire our brain via positive truthful affirmations and acknowledgements to undo the brainwashing.

I see that u have been, By God's Grace, abstinent for over a month now brother. Do you feel free yet? If you do not. It's not your fault. It's the brainwashing (both internalised and external). Just remember it is you has gained so much, and has lost NOTHING by quitting porn, and will continue to gain so much more because life is infinitely more enjoyable as a non-addict than as an addict.

If my words here serve the intended purpose and you find them to be of any help, and if you'd like to talk more or even just talk, feel free to pm me. I feel so good to be free of the porn trap now, I would be honoured if I coulf help anyone else find just how amazing it is to be free.

Yes, Thanks for reply Enderswish604! I feel more free, but I still have a lot of backflashes. Has to be strong.

It is ok to have flashbacks brother. I do too, a lot. What is important is how we react to them. I used to try to just shake them off or hide from them. That just always created a phobia in my mind from them, and made me feel weak and susceptible - helpless and out of control.

But then I learned (from a book), about how to deal with them properly. On this new method : All that is needed is to acknowledge them, and then say to ourselves what is the actual truth - that it is marvelous and amazing that we are now free of that filth, that we are no longer controlled by those thoughts and/ or impulses.

And that with every passing day, we get stronger and even more motivated, happier, better in every way. And the little monster inside, that causes all these urges, starves and will eventually die in oblivion.

We NEED to positively reaffirm ourselves on this truth, because you are already over the actual dopamine addiction brother, the mind heals remarkably quickly in that regard. But it is the brainwashing that persists and tries to make us feel so bad that we would fall back into those awful habits that NEVER EVER gave us any benefit and always took away basically everything from us.

These days, every time I get a thought or an urge, or anything, I simply remind myself and say to myself "I'm so happy I'm a non-PMOer now, that I am free, and will remain so, God Willing, for life", "It's amazing that with every passing day I am freeing myself from everything about this disgusting addiction, just look at how bad it made my thoughts! I'm so grateful and happy to be free now!"

Trust me, to even me, that sounded so silly to do. But that was because I didn't understand that the crux of this addiction wasn't the actual addiction. But the brainwashing that needed to be dealt with separately. The reason we have to positively reaffirm and realign our thoughts for at least a few weeks, is because

If we don't, then there is nothing to stop the brainwashing (that is constant, regardless of whether we've just relapsed, have just rebooted, are long into a successful streak) from making us feel depressed, angry, frustrated, deprived, like we sacrificed a part of ourselves to stop PMOing.

All of that, I'm sure you know, is lies that the little PMO monster we used to feed uses to make us fall again. So it becomes necessary to counter-act that with positive self affirmations and thoughts (which are all based on the truth).

As for external stimuli, remember that the ones who are still lost in all of that, they are the ones who are miserable. As miserable as we used to be! They deserve our pity, and if we could - our help. We have no need to envy someone who is worse off than us do we? Then it makes no sense for us to be triggered by those things either.

All this that I have said; we need to say to ourselves whenever we feel the brainwashing is grabbing hold of us. It is not difficult to do, believe me, it is in fact easy. And if you let the happiness of being non-PMOer fill you with its warmth, then you will even ENJOY it. :)

So just try what I said, and as always you can pm me whenever for whatever brother. I feel grateful and happy to be out of the porn trap. And it'd make me even happier to be able to help out the rest of my brothers and sisters here to do the same. :)