Am I addicted, sinful and is this good?

"I must watch porn".

No. That is an addict's thought. You do not HAVE to. Know yourself, because you won' t get clean until you do.

 

Porn consumption is essentially drug use, meaning we use porn, the way a druggie would, to obtain our true goal: A dopamine high. "Clean" means free from the addiction. Free from the addiction means, not using porn, at all, to get a dopamine high. You need to know this is what you have, actually, been doing, using P and MO to obtain a dopamine high. In order to over come the addiction, those activities have to stop. One of the difficult thoughts for all addicts, is what I call the impossible thought: I am quitting it, forever. The addiction lies to us and tells us we have to watch porn, or must watch it, or so screws with our brains that it never occurs that giving it up 100% is the only way to overcome it. When you talk about having to use P due to sexual energy building up--NO. That is a lie the addiction has told you. An addict always has a choice, and an addict must own that. An addict has a choice on whether to watch P or not, do it or do not do it, that is your choice. But an addict, if they watch P, then boom, they have no choice but to experience a dopamine high. The first thing you need to do is study your problem so you understand the brain science. I suggest you also research "the hard 90"; 90 days of abstaining completely from porn, MO, sex, sexual thoughts, vanilla porn, porn substitutes, porn memory, porn fantasy, porn imagination. You need to rebalance your brain, and take time to understand, you own you, porn does not own you. I hope this helps.

 

Here's another thing:
Some guys on here sigh I don't know about the women!
they found their confidence with women increased when they gave up masturbating and porn and more women seemed attracted to them. I'm NOT saying you'll get this effect, cos maybe you won't. But you said: "...to make
my life great with women again, and not with all these porn stars..."

It's POSSIBLE giving up PMO (porn, masturbation and maybe orgasm too but DEFINITELY the first two!!!) might help you with that.
(Even if it doesn't, the other replies give good reasons!!!)

 

P is like sugar. It is a super-refined form of something else. Like sugar, P takes something sweet and wonderful--real sexual connection with a lover--and removes all the messy parts and the real benefits, and concentrates it into something "unnatural"-- and by that I simply mean "not occurring in nature."

Sugar is sweet, and sometimes, it can be a pleasurable experience to immerse oneself in it's sweetness, like candy. But because of its super-concentrated nature, the body begins to change its normal patterns of metabolism, and we become used to its sweetness. And so we seek out more and sweeter things--soda, for instance. The food industry seeks to addict us to the sugar, so it finds ways to spike everythinge we eat with it, so that nothing natural or unprocessed tastes sweet any longer. Over time, the constant exposure to the super-concentrated sugar causes our metabolism to break down, and the body can no longer work with it. That disease is "diabetes," and it is accompanied often with obesity. Obesity is a symptom of sugar addiction and malnutrition.

So P, as a super-concentrated form of sexual stimulation destroys our ability to feel the power of natural sex, which isn't nearly as intense as P. The P industry is always seeking new ways (new scenarios, more intense fantasies) to addict us to its own form of sex, so that over time, we have no real sexual connection with other people.

The good news for us is that if we stop eating the highly sugared foods and beverages, over time, our bodies can return to normal--diabetes and obesity can be cured completely--and fruit tastes sweet again.

Likewise, giving up P lets our minds and bodies recover from the hyperstimulation, and eventually, we can reconnect in real, satisfying sexual relations with people.

I, too, have relied on brief bursts of P to help me reach O, so technically, I'm probably not fighting a full addiction, but since I have stopped using it, my relations with my husband are powerful, and M by myself has become much less powerful. (Read my intro post for that whole story.)

So the point is that while you may not be "addicted" in every sense of the word to P now, if you continue to rely on it for sexual gratification, it probably will become an addiction. Get out now, while you still can.