Fear of missing out

I don't get that for new porn, because I didn't usually watch new videos. Instead, I'd search for certain genres and select based on the thumbnail. But yeah, I know what you're talking about. I think that it's the fear of success. The fear that you will get to a month, or 90 days, or whatever point you will be recovered at (putting it in numbers is a little simplistic, but you get the idea.) And then you won't ever go back to porn. No matter how much I hate it, there's still some regret mixed in to the idea of being free.

 

I get it man, I remember telling myself "5 minutes of browsing wouldn't hurt". And then seeing a new vid with someone I liked and feeling like I almost had to dig deeper. Don't get locked down or stuck in that rut. Don't start browsing in the first place. It's tough but it'll pay off cause we're truly not missing much of anything.

 

You are at the stage of curiosity. Perhaps the visceral addiction in your stomach has gone, but your mind still plays up; 'I wonder what's new, I wonder if the most perfect woman the planet has ever seen has been exposed... I wonder if I can find Wonder Woman.' Push on through this slippery edge, and the curiosity will dry up. The crucial thing though is to find other things to meet your boredom. This is not so much about finding some magic activity, but developing other tastes within you. It serves your porn addiction a double whammy by first distracting it, and second by sapping it of its strength as you learn to take pleasure elsewhere. Good luck~~~~

 

Yep, push on through the slippery edge of the cesspool because you either find traction or slide back in. Good luck~~~

And you aren't missing out. The danger you face is missing out on that real cute girl you could have a life with.

 

All the timee!!! That's a major reason why I used to binge after a month of no PMO. I came across a month's worth of new videos which meant more to catch up on. I didn't want to miss out.

But think if this bro!

After watching this special on tv, my perception of this feeling of "missing out" has changed. Apparently the amount of dopamine levels sent to your brain while watching porn are similar (if not more enhanced) than the feeling of love. This intense exposure makes you fall in love with porn (and the pornstars) at a subconscious level... So what happens when you MUST break up with the one you love?
You feel lonely.

Not only that, you become obsessed with asking yourself "What is my ex doing right now? Is he/she happy without me?" This leads one to want to go back to their ex or at least.... See how they're doing. Reminisce on old times perhaps? Get lost in the moment, get a quick nut, then remember why you both broke up in the first place. The cycle repeats. The only difference between breaking up with porn and breaking up with a human is this:

Porn will always take you back.
And porn will always spit you back out.

 

I've felt this so much.

No matter how much I hate masterbation. No matter how much I hate porn. No matter how much I know it's harmful and unhealthy, etc. There is still a strong part of me that wants to PMO. That is the greatest threat to my rebooting process: A genuine desire to relapse.

 

That's why you have us! I used to hate the idea of posting but it definitely helps me feel less alone. But the great thing is.. fap or NoFap. One day your not going to feel alone anymore.

 

One thing that I've started doing to help with the boredom/lack of interest is to force myself to go out (or stay in) and do something wholesome and enjoyable. No tv/phone/internet. Something that takes a real commitment for 1 to 4 hours. Obviously, it hasn't magically solved my addiction for me, but I do feel some improvements and less desire to relapse when I can remember doing something I liked just a few days or a week ago, and plan what I'll do the next weekend.

 

That Gollum image is great. Sums up the irrational obsession perfectly.

I too went through a FOMO stage--there was a time when I was fixated on a particular performer and I wanted to see what else she'd done. After a while the light bulb went off that I would NEVER be all to see all the scenes of the handful of performers I was interested in at the time. And if I tried, my brain would have been over-saturated before I'd have gotten halftway through.

That cured me of the "what else is new out there" curiosity. If I spent my time trying to consume "what's new" out there I'd grow old and die in front of my computer screen before succeeding. Even my "iction" couldn't deny that (though my inner Gollum occasionally tries to anyway).

I also agree with the above that part of staying away from porn is growing other parts of your PMO-free life. Wise advice that I'm having success with right now.

 

the way FOMO manifested for me during my porn addiction was that i would be afraid of missing out on the videos i had ready and buffered in other tabs. the absurd thing was that i never actually watched all the other videos in full: either i would skip to certain parts or i would fail in my edging and blow it before i finished the first or second full video. sometimes i would keep those tabs open or note the titles of the videos and come back to those when i started up again.

so it wasn't so much a fear of missing out on something new but a fear of missing out on something i had prepared for myself. i waited all that time buffering, so i might as well just watch! haha.

 

God, that sort of addiction illogic sounds so familiar! One of mine was, "oh sh*t now that I've slipped I'd better binge and watch EVERYTHING I'd possibly want to see so I don't slip again any time soon!"

 

Still, it's progress of sorts.... that you feel you have to justify it.