211 days w/out porn, 36 days w/out masturbation - heres what I learned

I left nofap for awhile because the community here hates me but whatever. I'm back, I've stayed strong, I haven't relapsed.

Things have been very tough on other areas in my life, but I've gone strong with rebooting - as a result, I feel just generally better.

Some areas I feel have improved

• Morning wood - yes I get it and it feels good, before I simply didn't have morning wood like a normal 21 year old is suppose to
• Natural erections - I went to a sort of mental hospital for acting out and I met this girl and got strong erections when we were just talking, I didn't feel nervous at all, I was all alpha
• A tough shell - within the past 3 weeks I've had my expensive gun confiscated (I love guns) from me by my family because they thought I was dangerous, I had to go to a mental hospital, I have been arrested twice for the same thing and am facing a possible 1 yr in jail, I dropped out of college briefly. The worst part is something I cant even discuss here but I am constantly paranoid about going to prison. But I still have a realistic, generally positive outlook on life, I'm not clinically depressed anymore. (Though I am sad about my current situation outside nofap/rebooting)

Not everything is perfect, I am so terrified of relapsing and losing my progress that I am terrified of looking at any pictures (that includes your profile pics/I have to close my eyes) It has completely ruled my life starting a few months ago. I don't watch TV, movies, of any kind. I am overly fearful of relapsing.

So going forward I feel I am on the right track but just need to reach about 84 days of no masturbation and then I will be fully rebooted. I also quit using drugs.

 

Porn is never an option. Even if my mother died, porn is out of my life forever