1. Welcome to NoFap! We have disabled new forum accounts from being registered for the time being. In the meantime, you can join our weekly accountability groups.
    Dismiss Notice

Starting Properly

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by buddhist91, Jan 5, 2017.

  1. Ayjaydubya

    Ayjaydubya Fapstronaut

    Yes, gotta keep trying! That's the right attitude.
     
  2. finding_zen

    finding_zen Fapstronaut

    68
    45
    18
    It's alright dude, don't give up!
     
    D . J . likes this.
  3. Ayjaydubya

    Ayjaydubya Fapstronaut

    "The difference between the master and the beginner is that the master has failed more times than the beginner has ever tried."
     
    finding_zen and D . J . like this.
  4. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    I love this!
     
  5. buddhist91

    buddhist91 Fapstronaut

    37
    40
    18
    Yeah I know you have a point regarding the whole drinking thing. Out of my friends and family I hardly drink at all, for both personal and medical reasons 2-3 pints max a weekend (if even). Anyway when I don't drink I'm ALWAYS asked to give people lifts, which I've gotten pretty fed up with tbh. I've gotten a lot better at saying no if I don't want to drive, but I often feel like I'm inconveniencing others if I say no. Still end up doing it more often than not.

    Second Problem is finding like minded people who don't drink during the weekend. It's just a big cultural thing amongst my friends and family.

    I know I'm making excuses. I will give up booze completely again. It a pain in the ass regardless if I drink or don't drink- might as well choose the option more conducive to the goal at hand!
     
    Ayjaydubya and D . J . like this.
  6. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    That's a more constructive attitude. Even if you are letting people down by saying no, they will get over it. You should not always be a leaning crutch for their behavior.
     
  7. buddhist91

    buddhist91 Fapstronaut

    37
    40
    18
    Just checking in. On day 2. Feeling pretty productive today/inspired. I got results back for a set of professional exams I've been sitting and passed which I was delighted about. Initially I thought that my results were below average, but found out that I was on on the higher end of the spectrum! Pretty delighted and looking forward to seeing can I improve on this score for the next round. But Delighted to have gotten through first batch!

    Looking forward to working out later. In the meantime just getting through work, but in a pretty good flow/good mood. Urges not a major concern when you're in a good mood right?
     
  8. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Congratulations!!!

    Urges are always a concern but we tend to focus and dwell on "what if I have and urge?", "will I be able to resist it?" type thought when we are not in a good mood. When we are in good moods, we tend to ignore them better.
     
  9. buddhist91

    buddhist91 Fapstronaut

    37
    40
    18
    Day 3: feeling good, but feeling tired. Came back from a workout and collpased on bed. Urges came on strong. Was about to get rid of a blocker on my phone to look, then decided to change my password to " why not write on NoFap forum". So here I am.

    Also been reading a book about how the human mind/behaviour is effectively "just an algorithm machine". It's got some pretty good points and although I don't entirely agree with everything in the book, there's one or two things that I've picked up on which i quite like that has given me a bit of a different perspective on nofap, urges and the meditation process. I'm sure I've sure I've seen this line of thought on videos about NoFap and habit formation etc but I thought why not try and explain it? best way to prove you know something is by trying to explain it, right? Also I know this is grossly simplified but sure here goes nothing.

    The author argues that thoughts and feelings are simply biochemical algorithms reacting to things internal pressures, external pressures and effectively genetics. If i was to urges into a algorithm formula it would look like this.

    Step 1: (input) Pictures/thoughts of beautiful women ------> Step 2: Human Brain Algorithm shaped by excessive P use --------> Step 3: output = urges.

    So if you were a good strategist, trying to take down this algorithm you have three areas of attack.

    Attack Step 1: Stop looking at pictures of Beautiful women (easier said than done. But pictures are pretty tangible things and you can avoid, by blocking sites, not looking through magazines etc etc)
    Stop having thoughts about beautiful women is alot harder, if not impossible. Clearly a separate algorithm is involved in that case. HOWEVER, NOW I'VE iDENTIFIED THAT THERE IS AN ALGORITHM that makes me have those thoughts. Maybe the strategist might be able to figure out how to dismantle that algorithm as well....

    Attack Step 2: It seems difficult to attack step 2, or so it would seem. However I don't think its impossible. Imagine you're sitting at a chess board and it's your move. YOu find a line of attack that you think is quite interesting, and examine it for a while. You are in fact computing an algorithm. If I do x outcome is y. If the line goes nowhere, you look for another line, an eventually you'll pick one that suits your needs the best.

    So in order to Attack Step 2: appreciate that Human brain Algorithm shaped by excessive P use is always there, but there's always another alogrithm you can choose in order to achieve your aims!

    Finally Attack Step 3: SO once you reach step 3, which you inevitably will thanks to the faulty walnuts in our heads, it does not mean that the end is here.

    URGES are a NEW INPUT INTO A NEW ALGORITHM. Once again when a chess player looks at his scenario he looks at many options. Picking a algorithm line that ends in FAP is always an option.... but there are always others that are worth exploring first.


    What algorithm will I put urges into? What Algorithm will I put urges into? What algorithm will i put urges into? (It's the mantra I'm running in my head at the moment.)

    Meditation, I have found, has helped me (not cured me!) to take note of what automatic algorithms I am working at anyone time. It allows me to slow down, and utilise a strategic part of my brain.

    If I keep looking at the problem from the present moment and take a deep relaxed breath, i can see with a bit more clarity, what are my current inputs that need to be addressed, and what potential algorithms I can place them into in order to achieve the things I'd like to achieve.

    Ok. That was a long post- probably not explained as well as I could, and I'm starting to think I sound like John Nash from a Beautiful Mind but screw it :p

    Anyway DAy 3 y'all
     
    D . J . and Ayjaydubya like this.
  10. Ayjaydubya

    Ayjaydubya Fapstronaut

    Congratulations on Day 3. I like your password reset.
     
  11. D . J .

    D . J . Fapstronaut

    Congratulations on making it to Day 3!
     
  12. buddhist91

    buddhist91 Fapstronaut

    37
    40
    18
    back here again. Haven't been using my laptop alot recently. Have been using bookis pen and paper alot more recentlu to keep myslef off laptop. bad bad binge today though.

    Day 1 again
     
    D . J . likes this.

Share This Page