Can this even be done?

Welcome to the forum. We all have a unique list obstacles that make it more difficult to achieve recovery. Some of us have more temptation, some more emotional damage, some have mental issues, some have unresolved childhood trauma, etc. The truth is that there are NO good reasons why anyone can't quit this addiction. Is there any good reason why a drug addict should continue their habit? Is there any good reason why an alcoholic should continue drinking?

You have some very classic reasons why porn is so attractive to you. Temptation and opportunity are a dangerous combination. Plus our addiction only takes one second of weakness to before we're doing something we shouldn't. A wife who isn't interested in sex also provides physical and emotional excuses to turn to porn.

I can understand the 'I like this secret existence' mentality. Do you know why we like it? It takes away the pain and it makes us feel good. It's exciting and make us feel alive. We find comfort and acceptance in porn. It's easy, it doesn't judge, and it requires no work. It creates the illusion that all our needs are being taken care of. It's hard to give up something that appears to prop us up when we're feeling down.

I can also relate to the illusion that we aren't hurting anyone. We believe that our addiction keeps us functional. We believe that it keeps us from doing other, more harmful, things. We believe that it's harmless entertainment. But sooner or later we wake up and realize just how much this addiction is stealing from us. Instead of satisfying our thirst, it is slowly poisoning us. The gradual escalation in behavior is so slow that we don't realize just how depraved we have become. I think you are starting to realize just how much damage you have caused yourself.

I hope you find the knowledge, advice, and support you need to reclaim the man you used to be.

 

Thanks man, my urge to PM was so high until i was reading your post.
Have a nice day

Now to the topic: YES, it can be done. But let me tell you - it is hard. Don't think that porn addiction is easier to overcome than any other addiction. The good thing is, it is absolutely worth it.
I am at Day 44 now and it feels amazing - but STILL my brain keeps telling me and forcing me to watch P and MO. You always have to stay strong.