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Outside of porn?

Discussion in 'New to NoFap' started by Funky_Buddah, Aug 11, 2016.

  1. Funky_Buddah

    Funky_Buddah Fapstronaut

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    I absolutely have a problem with porn but I'm also finding that I obsess over good looking women in public. I haven't read of other people having this problem and curious if that is within "sex addiction"? My mind is always preoccupied with the female form and it's exhausting
     
  2. TheRevenant

    TheRevenant Fapstronaut

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    I gotta say if u feel attracted toward the opposite sex, i guess it's a good sign cause if u're so addicted to PMO which u can't almost control it u kinda lose ur tendency toward females and that's what ruins relationships but it seems ur attracted to them not in a way normal men would do and also ur mind being preoccupied with the female form is for sure one of the side effects of porn, I mean it's kinda a no brainer cause u keep training ur mind to find the perfect body (internet is full of perfect bodies, which would raise ur expectancy to peak everest ) and u remember them from the screen.
    But still i gotta say that if u enjoy watching girls outside, then it's pretty normal and that's what most people do and after all we're only human(we're not like angels who are neutral :confused:) otherwise there would have existed only one sex in the world(disgusting :confused::eek:o_O).
     
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  3. Jinx

    Jinx Fapstronaut

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    If you feel yourself zoning-out or being swept away with thoughts and fantasies about the women you see, yeah, that might be an issue.

    Try to take an honest assessment of whether or not it is adversely affecting your life and your relationships with others.

    If you aren't acting on it and are just aware of your attraction to them, though, it sounds pretty normal.

    If you consider it a problem, try to stop, but can't... that is a good sign that there might be an addictive element to it. In that case, there are a few different sex addict groups that you might find helpful.
     
  4. CerealKiller

    CerealKiller Fapstronaut

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    How far are you into your reboot?

    I have had a similar problem. My Gf got up me because I was perving on other girls in public without realising it. I caught my eyes just darting around the second a girl walked into my line of sight.
    I absolutely think that it is a side effect of porn use. Think about it like this, porn teaches your brain to seek novelty. That is what makes porn, or random sexual conquests so exciting. Novelty. When you aren't eyes deep in porn and instead are out in public your brain will be still in the habit of "Where is the new stuff?". Your brain is simply trained for it. You are hooked on novelty and nudity. It isn't your fault. Welcome to your brain on porn.
    How to stop it?

    K9 ALL of your technology. Stay away from any arousing material.
    When in public stare AT THE FLOOR, and only look at a female for eye contact and stare back at the floor. This isnt forever, you just have to untrain your body.
    Next, get some vitex agnus castus, otherwise known as monks pepper. It mucks with your pituitary gland and keeps your sexual urges quiet, and it doesn't make you get man boobs or anything. Next, loads of cold showers!
    Also, keep this thought in mind. 1. Live for the reality that exists, not the one you (or your brain) dreams about.
    2. Porn has told your brain that sex is easy and that you can have as much as you like. Also, your male mates and all the media ever tells you the same thing. You can't. You aren't meant to. Sex is only one small aspect of life. Just take it when you can get it, and leave it on the shelf when you dont. Sex is best when it is with someone you enjoy being around, not some women you have mentally objectified, or paid for to get your jimmies off. Blegh! You're a man! Work for your conquests!

    Keep this up and let yourself detox and your brain should calm down.
     
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  5. i_wanna_get_better1

    i_wanna_get_better1 Fapstronaut

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    Welcome to the forum. Our addiction isn't something that we do only when we're at home in the dark. It bleeds over into all aspects of our lives. We have trained our brains to be in a hyperactive state and it feels extremely uncomfortable when we try to calm it down. It wants to stay stimulated all the time, and if we're out in public it still wants to be fed by whatever stimulation is available. After watching porn for a long time we are molding our behavior around staying constantly stimulated. We want our brains to be constantly triggered. The massive amounts of dopamine that floods our system when it's aroused makes us feel alive, but there's always a price to be paid.

    Right now your brain is like a overexcited dog... what would Cesar Milan do? He would train the dog to be calm, submissive. Right now you are a slave to your addiction. As you go through your reboot you will start taking control of your thoughts, emotions, and behavior. Your addiction will fight back, but you must be determined to press forward. After a few weeks your brain will start calming down and you will become a more balanced person in the end. I wish you success on your journey.
     
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  6. Funky_Buddah

    Funky_Buddah Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for the reply!! This is the hardest part of my problem and the one that causes me the most emotional turmoil. It's a breath of fresh air to hear this so thank you again!
     
  7. Funky_Buddah

    Funky_Buddah Fapstronaut

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    Thank you so much!! It's relieving to hear someone else's perspective and gives me hope. I greatly appreciate it
     

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