Dad reBoot!

hey y'all 26 y/o American male ready to reboot here.

I'm not sure exactly what to put in here I suppose a little back ground may be in order?

First though I'd just like to mention my immense gratitude towards Alex Rhodes and everyone else behind NoFap, I truly believe porn is a seriously damaging drug and that it devastates individual's lives as well as the social and emotional core of society so here's to hoping many, many more see the light and pursue the temptations of pixelated skin!

Alright well as I mentioned above I'm mid 20's now and it all began with exposure to porn around the age of 6, which was reinforced by some sexual abuse by a family member (just enough to cement some serious emotional issues through out much of my life), and has continued until, well, 2days ago! 20 years! I did experience reprieve during times that I've been in relationships but that was usually temporary until the addiction caught up to me and generally began to sour said relationships. Over the last year my addiction seems to have taken a turn for the worse as I've found myself transfixed for hours by material I would consider beyond normal, for shame I won't go in to details here and now but it should be enough to say that it has weirded me out and still does to even think of sex in that way, especially for having enjoyed regular sex plenty in my life. This is what has brought me here, I've realized the real disconnect between me and my addicted self, they are not the same person and the addicted self represents me and my interests poorly.

I'm a successful guy in that everything I really try at goes well, I have a great job, I make a great living. I'm fortunate to be attractive, athletic, musically capable, and a helluva cook. However I am single, without confidence, often depressed, owner of a great anxiety towards social situations and all to often unmotivated. I believe these issues lie in my addictions; cigarettes, porn, and escapism. This is one of my first steps towards conquering this side of my life.

I've experienced delayed ejacualtion, performance anxiety, erectile dysfunction too many times in the last decade of my life to not take note of the upward trend in occurrences and the fact that these are symptoms of something much greater than miafortune. I made peace with my past, my abuse, and the world long ago, too long for those to be the sole culprit.

So here I go, I'm on my second full day of no PMO and aside from an unrelenting and unrelated headache I feel no different. I'm not worried though, I know full well this is a matter of perseverance and falling in to the trap of instant gratification is a big reason why I'm here today.

Wish me luck fapstronauts, gonna be one hell of a ride.


--Billy3eyes

 

Thanks guys!

 

It's kind of a weird thing to examine yourself objectively and come to that realization, it's like a split personality, that little dbag voice in your head that's always trying to undermine your best intentions, I hate that guy haha. Same guy always tells me that I can smoke a single victory cigarette after surviving 3 days with out a smoke. Clever bastard...