Losing faith in everyone on this site including myself

Almost at 60 and I'm still a virgin. Don't lose faith! It can be done

 

NoName, I agree that it has got to be a whole lot easier to do this when you have a chance of getting sex outside of MO. That's fine, but I have been told by people battling this while in a relationship that you have to get this monster under control before you get into a relationship. And I think when you and I get down the road of kicking this shit, we're going to be in a really good position to get into some actual sex with real people. I think my goal is to get the P out. Back when I jacked off to a fantasy about an actual person, it was kind of nice. Jacking off to 5 different windows streaming nasty crap is so not real, so destructive. If I had to write it in proportion to what i think is the size of the problem, it looks like this: PMO.

 

apple, you freaking ROCK!

 

Im virgin , believe in yourself and be strong!
God bless!

 

Virgin here as well. You can do it, you just need to believe in yourself. Finding yourself a partner won't hurt either

 

I'm not sure exactly how to help, but maybe get an accountability partner, get defensive strategies when you encounter triggers, run into the bathroom and get a cold shower when you feel like you're about to masturbate. IDK but look at other people's threads and study their strategies. And if you haven't got a blocker, now is the time.

 

ok, no name, you are being a bit hard on yourself. First of all, you need to go back and read your whole journal from beginning to end. You talk about a 37 day streak, then a 13 day streak or so. You have had successes and you know what they are all about and why you are doing this. I do not remember how old you are, but you young men do have this thing rougher than us old guys, no doubt. And you are younger and more determined than us old guys, so use that to your advantage. First off, even though you gave in recently, I do see you resisted porn a few times. Let me encourage you, in fact I challenge you, to resist the porn every time, all the time. I challenge you to not put that trash into your mind anymore. First give up the porn, then work on the masturbation addiction. Not the ideal or perfect way to kill both addictions, but maybe a better path for you. You need to decide how to tackle this to be successful long term. If you do decide to continue to masturbate, and that is up to you and your goals, I strongly encourage you to masturbate to your pre-set masturbation schedule, not just masturbate whenever you feel like it. Set a schedule, and set your schedule to stretch yourself. 'I will masturbate every 5 days, or 7 days, or 10 days, or whatever.' Put a star on the calendar on those days you have given yourself permission to masturbate, and oh, btw, I do not mean to masturbate all day, but once that day. Doing this successfully will put your big brain in charge of your sex life and not leave it in the hands of your little conniving part of your brain.

Next, get educated. Learn more about the chaser effect. Know that on days 1-2-3-4-5, it is your mind that is messing with you. Don't let your mind win. You take control of you. You be king of your mind, not that flipping small bunch of nerve endings in that small part of your brain. You have experienced that when you go 13 days, and you beat that. Then by day 13 you noticed that you seemed like you were going to explode and have cum splattered all over the room. That is no longer the Chaser effect. That is your body ready to explode. If you had waited, your penis would have erupted with a wet dream. Do not be scared of wet dreams. They are your friend.

What do you need to learn? Ask, and one of us will help you if we can.

I also encourage you to really journal. Not just a line or 2, but really share and write what is going on inside your head and how it feels and what you want to do with your extra energy. Write about the great things that happened today and write about the things that bothered you today. Get down and personal and get the feelings out of your head and into this forum where nobody knows your name, but everybody is in the same game you are in. We are all here to heal together.

Yes, those of us having sex with our wife may have a sexual release on occasion. Those having sex every day or every other day are cheating themselves out of a real re-boot and real healing, in my opinion. (Sure to get some discussion on this statement coming soon.) Note it is now 7 days since my last orgasm, and I am seriously thinking about going hard mode 30 or 60 or 90 days, even though I am married. Trust me also, you want to get this out of your life before you get serious about even looking for someone to date.
Hope this helps. Be strong, my friend, and carry on.
FW

 

I'm 66 days in and I havn't had sex. I'm actually saving myself for marriage, I only intend to have sex with someone I really love. yep, old school and hardcore mode. I recently wrote this post with some tips and how I made it to 60 days. http://www.nofap.org/forum/showthread.php?6193-How-to-resist-fapping-for-60-days

All the best

 

Hey man! I am also a virgin and saving myself for marriage, for someone special.

Don't despair, and don't give in to self-pity - its destructive.

 

If you have chance to have sex that is fine. We are fighting here deviant behavior such as masturbation and porn watching.

 

Not a virgin any more, but I used to have sex frequently a few years ago. I am trying to do my best without sex and it is quite hard because my mind and body keep feelings of my past experience...

I really think that TOGETHER we can fight!