Being attracted to mature women? Bad sign?

They probably just look more attainable. Although I think if I cold approached one she'd think it was weird.

 

Do not use porn terminology here. I have edited your original post.

 

How old are you?

 

I don't see it as a problem. As humans we're attracted to all kinds of people: older, younger, "ugly" beautiful. Don't box yourself in with limiting thoughts about who you "should" be attracted to. There is nothing wrong with liking older women.

 

Yep.

 

Holy crap. I experience this issue almost every day. I'm sure this is due to one of my last P-fetishes, namely mature women. Currently, even though I'm at day 35, I mostly get attracted to older women (30-50 yo) and can't work it out. I'm worried 'cause I'm sure I'm not healed yet. idk what to think about!

 

So what? Dude, there is a 50 yo old woman at my work and she is hot, keeps herself in awesome shape, etc. Why is that wrong for her to be attractive? Are we supposed to only be attracted to women between a certain age, 33 and 37 for example? The sexual part of our brain doesn't make those distinctions. Attraction is unconscious. You can make the logical decision once the attraction has surfaced whether or not to act on it, but trying to control what is unconscious seems to me like a big waste of energy.

 

It's not wrong but it might be led by porn.

I think for me it was porn led at first. HOWEVER then i did realise mature women are more stable and know what they want in life kind of like "they been there and done that". Like when girls talk about older guys and their benefits...

Also in society its ok for a 50year old man to be with a 20 year old girl but when a 40 year old woman goes out with a 25 year old it is considered "wrong" - dont let this put you off!

Also women might say younger guys aint mature but my argument is that age is a number that defines the year you was born in. What actually counts is the mental age - you can be old and immature and have no principles on life but be young and aspirational with your head screwed on!

 

@numpty: Society does not view a 50 year old man with a 20 year old girl as normal. Certainly, not western society and not even modern Thai society (I live in Thailand), though it is more common than in the west (and is mostly only the case when the guy has money).

The OP states he is only 19. I don't know if this a P induced fetish or not. It is hard to tell. Some 30-39 year-olds look rather youthful and others really don't. It depends. My Thai wife is 38, but looks about the same age as me (I'm 10 years younger). Different cultures age quicker/slower than others (lifestyle related, obviously). I probably wouldn't be naturally attracted to a woman 10 years older in my native country. The age gap would rather obvious and I probably wouldn't connect easily.

I guess if the OP is attracted to them SPECIFICALLY BECAUSE they look older, then it may be a perversion and abnormal, maybe. But it is difficult to say.

Maybe, it could be their maturity and confidence?

 

Hi @Son_of_Iroquois , thanks for your reply!

I exactly understand what you're saying. And I quote every single word of your post. Though my question is different: I was just asking if my being attracted mostly by mature women is porn-induced or not. 'Cause during most of daily situations, I'm only attracted by this kind of women and feel less attraction towards girls wo are the same age as I (I'm 28). Before I found this mature p-festish I hardly noticed mature women.
That's why I believe mine is still a fetish and what you call "the sexual part of the brain" could be damaged. Don't have anything against older women, but I'd prefer serious relationships with girls of my age

Every opinion/advice is accepted!

 

I still think the MILF thing was invented to prolong porn star's careers.

 

This is super off-topic, but I'll ask here because there's not really a better way to ask. Why can I not pm you?

 

That may have more to do with what gender role you are playing and how that affects your psychology. During relationships, there are two kinds of gender roles: male and female. Basically this just means a person is either dominant, proactive, and in control, (male gender role) or submissive, reactive, and being controlled (female gender role). The feminists will start screaming their heads off at that statement, but it's true. In a male-female relationship, by and large there has to be a leader and there has to be a follower. Whether the leader is the man or the woman is up to the couple and what works for them

Now, you don't have to biologically be a male or female to play a particular gender role psychologically. In fact, many men are unknowingly playing the female gender role as they are passive and submissive. Modern society seems to encourage the emasculating of men and pushes them to play the female gender role. Why that is, is not clear.

How does this relate? Well, after years of P use a person is likely conditioned to be passive and submissive regarding their sexuality. After all, there is nothing more passive than sitting behind a computer screen watching others take action sexually. So a core female gender role may be in place: one of passivity and submissiveness, that has been conditioned into the P user. So in the real world that may influence a P recoverer to be more attracted to dominant type women: i.e. older women, women in positions of experience, authority, etc.

Conversely, someone who is playing the male gender role: being dominant, proactive, taking charge, etc, would be more attracted to the submissive type: women their age or younger. A man not conditioned by porn would be in a state of control, action, and dominance regarding women. Just another way of looking at it.

 

That's a very interesting insight!

Anyway, I must admit the opposite happens to me...most of time. In fact older women always give me the impression of being "more inclined to sex" than average girls and this idea terribly arouses my will to sexually dominate them.

In any case, I will wait 'til my complete 90-days-reboot to see what happens.