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Day 50-Almost Relapsed

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Eaglevision_2019, Aug 25, 2019.

  1. Eaglevision_2019

    Eaglevision_2019 Fapstronaut

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    Hi guys, today is my 50th day. Two days ago I nearly relapsed. I found myself scrolling through revealing Instagram model images. Got hard and touched myself a little bit. Well, tracing my thought process, I think a specific trigger has contributed to this. I can hear through the walls my neighbors making love and I'm tempted to press my ear to hear them clearly. It awakes certain fetishes which are dangerous to my nofap commitment. Felt like I was close to losing my benefits; penis sensitivity has somewhat reduced (It had become incredibly sensitive) but nothing major with brain fog, decreased energy or depression have I noticed. This was followed by a wet dream, I guess it was caused by touching and images. It's been disturbing for a few days and it's a dangerous trigger. I don't want to say that urge to watch porn has completely waned; however, I do feel that I am in control. This noise of people having sex is the problem. I do not want to blame my neighbors as they are not that noisy. It’s just that I have become so attentive and I can pick the noise even from the slightest movement or sound. I do not want to ruin my streak because it is an incredible journey so far. Any word of encouragement from experienced fapstronauts?
     
    Last edited: Aug 25, 2019
  2. StonePlacidity

    StonePlacidity Fapstronaut

    at least you didn't fap, good job!
     
    Eaglevision_2019 likes this.
  3. questtocure

    questtocure Fapstronaut

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    Mate you touched yourself, whether it was for a sec or not thats considered fapping, up to you if you want to reset the counter or not, just remember it's not always about the counter. Be honest to yourself and you'll get back in no time
     
    Strijder and Eaglevision_2019 like this.
  4. Eaglevision_2019

    Eaglevision_2019 Fapstronaut

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    Maybe you are right. However, I'm looking at what I exposed myself to and also the extent of touching (not stroking), probably didnt last a minute and no ejaculation was involved whatsoever. So, yeah..having relapsed several times in the last couple of months, I dont believe this was a relapse..I'm gonna leave the counter running.
     
    Strijder likes this.
  5. Strijder

    Strijder Fapstronaut

    I don’t agree but it’s not bad that you’re so strict.

    I think that’s wrong man, touching yourself for a sec and quit right after is for me not an act of weakness but of strength! There is a difference in real masturbation with sexual thoughts. Touching for a sec makes you just human. You must love yourself in this process and touching for a sec, oke a mistake and move on.
    We aren’t perfect.

    I do think it’s dangerous because it’s about what you do with the feelings later on. You’re brain isn’t like ohhh I touched my penis for a sec, hey all is lost but it does think hey penis maybe try things later on? There lays the real danger.
     
    questtocure and Eaglevision_2019 like this.

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