I mean, is porn really thaaaat bad?

Denial is not a river in Africa. It is up to you to decide if something that has 'completely ruined your life' is really thaaaat bad.

 

But you are cheating.

So you are ruining your life.

Someone needs to simplify it for you.

You have all your answers but you refuse to acknowledge them, and until you do, nothing will get better.

 

Dude! You literally have just stated you can’t hold down jobs because of it, spend hours online cyber sexing and browsing porn, your talking to men online... dude are you trolling or what man? Porn definitely has had an impact on yourself and many of us even myself man I’m not just sitting here pointing fingers at you but if you’re not trolling dude honestly everything you have wrote here is definitely because of porn.

 

1. It's not cheating if it's with a partners consent. You and your partner decide for yourselves what is ok within your relationship.
2. Problem is, porn is a habit of escalation. The porn that arouse you today will not arouse you tomorrow. The brain is not built that way. Most people that view extremely graphic, violent or even illegal stuff had no interest in that from the beginning and it's important to remember that. You have already experienced the escalation for yourself.

 

Are you strong enough to loose your partner? Are you strong enough to see her marry another man? Are you strong enough to live without a potential family, maybe without an income? Are you strong enough to face the disappointment of your parents when they find out?

The escalation is inevitable due to loss of dopamine receptors. The risk of you experience sexual dysfunction sooner or later is enormously large. But we all decide what's worth it for us. It feels like you need to hit rock bottom before you want to change your ways.

 

Don't forget we lie to ourselves best of all. Stop compromising and cut it off your life.

 

Is porn really that bad?



Thats the end of my talk, thanks for listening.

 

Porn and masturbation are, especially to gay stuff. You need to stop that and wake up

 

Man, sorry, but are you aware how ridiculous does this exact statement sound?

 

The correct amount of P, P-subs, M, sexual ideation, and O apart from your partner is zero. But it's a process. You don't get there in one big leap. I've been working on recovery actively for over six years, and it's only in the past three months that I have managed to finally completely eliminate P-subs and sexual thinking.

My recommendation would be to cut out the P first. Eliminate it ruthlessly. It is the poison. Then, once you have a firm handle on that, start getting rid of MO, too. Tackle things one step at a time with a firm resolve and community support. Be faithful to your partner in mind and body. Take fidelity to a new level and encourage your SO to do the same.

I am cheering you on! You *can* do this! I know -- because I did it, and I'm just completely normal and average.

 

These are all P-subs. This is why discipline -- mental and otherwise -- is a required skill for long-term recovery.

For example, FB. If it is a source of unhelpful imagery, then stay away from it. That is a conscious choice that is under your control. Browse with images turned off by default to avoid triggering content. Install accountability software and flag FB as something to alert your APs whenever you go on it. There are many options to address the things that trip us up. The main limiting factor is our desire to choose differently.

 

You have made no friends in a few years? Perhaps the issue is *too much* time on FB!

There are always excuses we can make. Recovery has a cost associated with it. You will not recover if you are not willing to pay that price. The longer you delay in doing so, the higher the price becomes. The choice of what to do is yours, each day, each decision.