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Established Personal Goals after Quitting Porn

Discussion in 'Success Stories' started by Pastor Preston, Aug 8, 2018.

  1. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    1. No PMO
    112 day streak!
    2. No alternative masturbation techniques or masturbation during sleep (sexsomnia)
    12 days
    3. No turning in schoolwork late.
    12 days
    4. Things are looking up for my relationships with my friends. I am less scared to do things like call and text them, now.
    5. My relationship with women is getting better. I am learning a great deal about how to communicate with them. I realized something amazing about the girl I like, yesterday. I was actually more comfortable talking to her than anyone else in the building. I have gradually grown to realize that she is my truest friend, at the moment.
    6. My pastor's wife said something to me, yesterday that really clicked. She said that she and her husband had lots of fun at their previous church. She caught herself and said, "Holy Spirit fun." I decided, I can't keep letting other things get on my mind than God. I will not love life until my fun/happiness/joy/peace comes from Jesus.
    7. Improve family relationships
    I just spend the weekend with my family. It is also looking up. They are starting to accept God's calling on my life, which is relieving.
     
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  2. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    1. No PMO
    115 day streak!
    2. No alternative masturbation techniques or masturbation during sleep (sexsomnia)
    I don't really know if I can help it or not, but I'm resetting the counter because of M during sleep.
    3. No turning in schoolwork late.
    15 days
    4. I met a friend yesterday. Stopped by a professor's office. Talked to many great people at church. Yesterday was a good day.
    5. I talked to some sweet girls at church. Talked to some sweet old ladies as well :D
    I am getting to the point to where the girls my age are also noticing me. My diet and exercise regime are effective!
    6. I got to see my pastor, his wife, and his grandchildren. They make my day every time.
    7. Improve family relationships
    Still getting over that weekend with my family :)
     
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  3. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    These goals are tough to keep. I will be honest, the most difficult two right now are 2 and 3. My resets have been because of 2.
     
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  4. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    I want to focus on two goals, especially:
    1. No porn, sex, or masturbation of any kind
    2. Masturbation during sleep, not including wet dreams obviously

    I am still focused on the other goals. I want to be close to Jesus more than to reach any milestone regarding a streak etc.
    I have not viewed P and have hardly looked at pictures of women at all since November 2018. I don't think sexually like I used to, and really only think about it unintentionally at this point. I realize that I have come a long way. I know that I can quit M during sleep. I know that I can start dating. I know that I can tell the girl I like how I feel. I know I can get better with the help of God.
     
  5. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    Three days toward meeting the two goals.

    My faith in God is also growing. I have time that I spend with Him each day, and it is nice. I look forward to it. I am starting to make God the hugest priority in my life. He is my first love, and I am returning to Him. It feels so good and is making me so happy. Revelation 2:4 says, "But I have this against you, that you have left your first love." I am returning to my first love after many years of kicking against Him. I put porn, women, and earthly success above God. I do not want to do that any longer. I want to be the man that God wants me to be and grow closer to Him.
     
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  6. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    I'm growing much closer to God. I would even say that my love for Jesus is crowding out my love/addiction for/to porn, women, and earthly success.
     
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  7. Pyara31

    Pyara31 Fapstronaut

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    All the best on your journey sir. May God bless you with the success and happiness that you deserve and give you the valor to fight this addiction. You have clarity in what you are doing and your faith in God will lead you to your destination. Peace out.
     
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  8. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    Thanks!

    Peace out, DR!
     
  9. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    Here's a thought. I feel like I have no control over masturbating at night. That is just foolish. I call it "masturbation during sleep." Call it what I will, it's all my fault and I can't blame anyone but myself. It's my responsibility to quit masturbating any time of the day, night, week, month, or year.

    It is the same way with the girl I like. What I call social anxiety is just me being unsure of myself. I don't know if I'm ready or even if I like her. I know I think she's pretty and I know God put her in my life for some reason. It's safe to say that I want to get to know her. Whenever I try to talk to her so no one else can or message her so she will think about me, but then refuse to ask her at least to hang out, it's my fault. Social anxiety just means I'm shy. It doesn't mean that it somehow became illegal for me to talk to someone.

    I care. The girl is my friend, and she's amazing. My friends are the best. My pastor and family do the best that they can. They are the best that the Lord could have blessed me with. I could type more, but I have homework.
    God bless you if you are reading this. It's a big realization in my life, for sure.
     
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  10. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    I haven't posted here in a while. As a reminder, this thread contains the reader's digest version, whereas my "Christian Graduate Student" one contains much more detail. Here is a link to it:

    I feel amazing! The Lord has delivered me from PMO. Here is a brief timeline:

    From when I was 11-17, I used P-subs and experimented a little with M, and turned sex down every time it was offered. At age 15, I became a Christian.

    When I was 18, I masturbated for the first time. I continued to do this and use P-subs until recently. During college, I found hard-core porn due to a Google image search and watched it on-off until recently.

    Before beginning graduate school, I briefly received counseling and briefly attended Celebrate Recovery. It was at this point that I realized that porn is wrong and began the process of quitting. I nearly quit during my first year of graduate school.

    I relapsed into using P-subs and watching porn in the final months of my first year of graduate school. I entered a guilt-laden cycle of on-off PMO.

    The spring of 2018 saw my worst relapse that led to a terrible depression where I barely completed my classes. During that summer I developed the hugest crush of my life and was unable to tell her about my feelings.

    I joined NoFap and was able to quit porn by November of 2018. I entered a cycle of masturbation and P-subs were starting to come back. The Lord has finally delivered me from masturbation.

    I realize how much the Lord loves me and that He has a plan for me. He will put the right woman in my life, just as He has delivered me from PMO. I will be in His time and will magnify His love.

    Thanks for reading. Please let me know if I can pray for you.
    In Christ,
    Preston
     
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  11. EXPONENTIALLY

    EXPONENTIALLY Fapstronaut

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    Remember this as you naturally vanquish anxiety as you abstain. God bless.
     
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  12. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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  13. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    Thanks bro. That really helps!
     
  14. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    I wonder how it's going with my old goals...

    1. No PMO
    52 days
    2. No alternative masturbation techniques or masturbation during sleep (sexsomnia)
    52 days
    3. No turning in schoolwork late.
    Hmm. I guess I haven't in a while!
    4. My relationships with my friends are quite well. The only thing that I really want to work on is meeting new friends. I do want to still be good friends with my existing ones to the extent possible. I had dinner with several of my friends in the past week. I have been on hikes. I have one new friend who is willing to help me with church functions. My pastor and I are planning a hike. It isn't so bad, I don't suppose!
    5. My relationship with women is getting better... but...

    ...not sure what I was on when I wrote that...

    Don't like her anymore. Not that way. I am becoming more comfortable talking to girls. I just want one who will talk to me. I don't have a problem with getting dudes to talk to me and tell me their stories. Heck, one of the best looking and most popular dudes at the college I attend loves hanging out with me. We have similar interests. Exercise, ministry, both country boys. Why can't I find a good looking country girl who loves working out and Jesus!!! (?) Where on Earth is she? I'll even go so far as to say she doesn't have to be country lol. She just has to love Jesus and me!

    6. My relationship with the youth I minister to is increasing. God is making grace to abound in my direction. I even tear up some when I talk about them. They all love me and are comfortable with me. I have grown so much since starting graduate school to become a minister.

    I am starting to realize how close to God I will have to be in order to make it in ministry. It is something that cannot be faked.

    7. Improve family relationships
    I spent another weekend with my family. We drove for hours to see a band that I really like. It was awesome! There are some areas that I will not be able to reconcile with my family. They will never really like that I went to graduate school for ministry. They will always want me to make more money and to come back to live with them. They will always want more control of my life than I am willing to give them. It is hard to take control of my life, coming from the conflict that I grew up in.

    Me and my brother will always have a tough time getting along. I am not sure what the issue is. Some of my friends meet him and say that something is a bit off. He still lives with my family, and the conflict he goes through there is immense. I couldn't imagine still being in that dysfunction. Bottom line is I want to make things right with them, but I'm wasting my time sense they don't want to make things right with me. Agree to disagree and move on. We will keep alive what we can keep alive.

    And, to boot, I need mentorship. My folks don't have the ability to tell me the ways of life. Not for a minister. They just don't know. The folks out there who do know don't, and I mean never do, have the time to pour into me. My pastor has poured into me all that he can, and more than anyone else has. He has his own family. He can't spend hours or even minutes with me each day. Couldn't expect him to. I'm having to figure it all out with hardly a platform. I'm intrepid and scrappy though; I want to learn it so bad that I will push through anything to learn it. I am not hungry, but starving, bleeding and dying to do what God is calling me to do.
     
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  15. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    Here is the place that I do a recap every now and then. See the real journal in the spoiler if you dare :)

    My how far I have come. I couldn't go a day without porn when I first started here last July. I got to about 35 days without porn a few times, but never went too far without M. I haven't watched any real porn since November 2018. I still did psubs, though. I got badly hooked on psubs earlier this year. I M'd several times a day usually. May was the last time that I PMO'd to psubs.

    Here is how the past hundred days went. 35 days were very terrible. Blue balls hurt extremely bad starting basically the second day. Somewhere between 35 and 50 days, my body started managing the excess semen retention without sexual release. Around the 65th day, I started having these random orgasms, perhaps coregasms. They come with a troublesome chaser effect that I really am trying to get rid of. I even looked up psubs a couple times, but did not finish. If there is a goal for my next 100 days, it is to do without the random orgasms and psubs.

    It's worth mentioning that I have these two new friends, a guy and a girl, that I spent this summer hanging out with. The girl is from my church and we hang out all the time. I work out and grab food with the guy. They are amazing, and give me hope that I will find friends in the future. Hopefully I stay in touch with them.

    I'm looking for a new job in ministry and trying to finish my master's thesis. It coming close to the wire. With God's help, I will persevere!

    Sincerely,
    Preston
     
  16. Angus McGyver

    Angus McGyver Fapstronaut

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    Keep fighting the good fight! With my Godly faith being revived after a few months into my NoFap-journey last year (after being almost gone for 14 years during which I was a captive under lust, lustful thoughts, envy, jealousy, ignorance and much more) I started to have a pray of gratitude every morning for:
    Being alive and healthy and for what I already have in life. Lately, I also found some good prayers for dealing with lustful thoughts that once in a while come haunting me again:

    Lord Jesus Christ, I confess here and now that you are my Creator (John 1:3) and therefore the creator of my sexuality. I confess that you are also my Savior, that you have ransomed me with your blood (1 Corinthians 15:3, Matthew 20:28).
    I have been bought with the blood of Jesus Christ; my life and my body belong to God (1 Corinthians 6:19–20).
    Jesus, I present myself to you now to be made whole and holy in every way, including in my sexuality. You ask us to present our bodies to you as living sacrifices (Romans 12:1) and the parts of our bodies as instruments of righteousness (Romans 6:13). I do this now. I present my body, my sexuality [“as a man” or “as a woman”] and I present my sexual nature to you. I consecrate my sexuality to Jesus Christ.
     
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  17. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    I like that prayer, brother! Thanks, Mac! Life is really a gift that we take for granted too often. Jesus Christ is our creator and we need to appreciate what we have been given!
    So, how have you been?
     
  18. Angus McGyver

    Angus McGyver Fapstronaut

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    You are welcome! Knowing that sex-transmutation of that incredibly strong sex-energy can easily make me a millionaire within a decade or less (if used righteously and wisely) and get me on the path to an incredible future life most people dream about, I can't simply afford wasting it on temporary lust-driven encounters that will only set me back.
    Otherwise, I have been great as I am about to move within the next few weeks which will give me another fresh-start.
    Aaron's blessing in Swedish (Numbers 6:22-27) :

    Herren välsigne eder och bevare eder.
    Herren låte sitt ansikte lysa över eder och vare eder nådig.
    Herren vände sitt ansikte till eder och give eder frid.
     
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  19. DaniAK6

    DaniAK6 Fapstronaut

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    Congrats man and God bless you
     
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  20. Pastor Preston

    Pastor Preston Fapstronaut

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    @Angus McGyver

    Now that is why we do NoFap :D

    That's classy, brother. I say the English version of that sometimes at the end of church services. I wish you the best on your move coming up. I'm getting ready to move, too. I don't know how far or to where, yet. I'm kind of confused, and searching for God's will!
     
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