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Porn usage has overall decreased, binging has gotten worse?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by skaterdrew, Jun 9, 2019.

  1. skaterdrew

    skaterdrew Fapstronaut

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    The title of my post might not sound like it makes much sense, as I have said my porn usage has decreased but my binging has gotten worse. But hear me out.

    So basically I was heavily addicted to PMO for about a decade. Over the last year my porn usage has massively decreased. I have had a lot of streaks, but also a lot of relapses. But going from heavily using PMO every day for a decade to not using it for a month or weeks at a time is still progress.

    But my main concern these days is when I do relapse and return to porn I always seem to go in to a binge when I do watch it. With me it's never usually a case of PMO for 10 minutes switch it off and don't watch it again for weeks, no. What I seem to do is literally edge, masturbating to porn for hours before I ejaculate, and I can do this a good few times in one day. So this means I could literally be PMOing for up to 10+ hours in a day. It's almost as if I don't want to let the PMO go because I know when I finish I'm not going to have it again for a while. I also think the reason I stop my self from ejaculating and edge for hours is because the pleasure is over when I ejaculate, so I stop my self from ejaculating and literally edge for hours masturbating and searching hundreds of different content before I ejaculate. But as far as I am aware this is the most damaging thing, as it is raising by far the most dopamine in the brain.

    Another problem is these days a lot of the time I actually find porn much more arousing, enjoyable, pleasurable and stimulating when I do relapse on it these days. When I used to PMO all the time the strange thing is I didn't actually find it that enjoyable. But now what seems to have happened is after not PMOing for a while when I do return to it I find it super exciting and enjoyable. This doesn't exactly help me, how much more pleasurable it seems to be.

    The strange thing is I can usually go without PMOing again for weeks. But then when I do eventually relapse on it I go in to these binges that last a day, and then I don't use it again for weeks.

    So this is the cycle I seem to be stuck in at the moment. Any help and advice would be much appreciated. Thanks
     
  2. IR254

    IR254 Fapstronaut

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    You're not alone with your problem. I struggle with this pattern as well. I can recommend, that you read the following article if you haven't already. It helped me to understand what's going on. That being said, I haven't found a reliable way out of this mess yet. I'm still looking and trying different things to control my behavior better.

    Here's the article:
    https://www.yourbrainonporn.com/reb...ong-abstinence-with-binges-an-addiction-risk/
     
  3. This has happened to me recently. When I finally do give in, I go alllllll out. If I’m gonna fail... I seem to make sure that I fail epically.
     
    Deleted Account and recon117 like this.
  4. Fenix Rising

    Fenix Rising Fapstronaut

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    Man you need to stop binge PMO. I've been stuck in described cycle for nearly 2 decades and it really massed me up big time, PIED included. This kind of behavior literally shrinks gray matter in prefrontal cortex (in charge of rational thinking) https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/mind-change/201504/is-surfing-the-internet-addictive The good thing is, it's totally reversible, the bad that it takes 185-314 days of total abstinence for gray matter to return to normal volume -> https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.php?threads/hopeless-case-searching-for-hope.187822/page-14

    There is no way around it, you should aim for at least 6 months of hard mode to give brain time to recover. Going for few weeks streaks is not gonna do it as you're still maintaining PMO neurological pathway through cravings. Your mental state should be never again. That being said, occasional slip is OK, shit happens- we're only humans after all, but binge sessions after a slip will only reinforce prebuilt PMO neuropathway. You don't allow your brain to build new neuropaths (deep learned behaviours) and abandon old PMO one (which is very, very strong, like a highway) if you commit binge PMO session every few weeks.
     
    Deleted Account and recon117 like this.
  5. Veritech

    Veritech Fapstronaut

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    First, your body misses and yearns for porn. This is why your reactions to your relapses are stronger than reactions during consistent use.

    Second, if you have already set your counter to zero, no big deal if you binge on porn as you cannot reset an already reset counter.

    However, the saying if you are going to fall, fall hard makes no logical sense. If you fall, would you rather lightly scrape your knee or would you rather smash your head?

    When you notice that you have relapsed, motivate yourself to pick yourself up right away.
     
  6. I also do struggle with this and the above reason is a big one for me. One thing that has helped to some degree is to not only register the number of days passed without porn. When I do relapse, I also register the number of ejaculations and the amount of time spent with porn. By writing down these numbers I get a motivation to keep these as low as possible, in addition to the normal counter.
     
    LavaMe and Fenix Rising like this.
  7. LavaMe

    LavaMe Fapstronaut

    It is like if you were giving up smoking. When you have a smoking habit a cigarette doesn’t do that much for you. But if you’ve given it up for a while a cigarette can give you a buzz. That buzz tempts you to go back to smoking because you imagine it will be like what you just experienced. But it won’t be.

    You want to avoid the usage after a while of abstinence precisely because it will draw you back in with a false notion. And if you do slip then it is important to tell yourself what you just experienced is a lie. Soon you’ll be back to spending endless hours not enjoying yourself but compulsively engaging in an activity that makes you miserable.
     

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