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Gf and her old sex partners

Discussion in 'Compulsive Sexual Behavior' started by Dee1dee1, Mar 15, 2019.

  1. Dee1dee1

    Dee1dee1 New Fapstronaut

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    Hey!

    First of all, excuse me for my bad English.
    I recently discovered this page and i will give it a go.

    For many years i have been watching porn and i have come to a certain point where i have huge problem with my girlfriends earlier sex partners. I feel like my junk is not good or big enough. Thats my biggest issue, sizes of her old partners. She's been with some big ones...
    It haunts me every day. I have stopped enjoying sex, what only comes to my mind is the other guys she had sex with. My mind is telling me she's stretched out, that i dont feel anything because of that etc...

    When i watched porn, a big part of it was with big dicks. I saw here in front of me with a big dick and it makes me sad every time. Feel like im not masculine enough...

    Have been going for NoFap the last 5 days and hope it will help me.

    I hope you understand whats my problem.

    Is there anyone with the same problem? Someone with good input on how i should think? What to do?

    / Dee1dee1
     
  2. Welcome to the community. Read, learn and start making your plan.
    As far as her past men, no matter how big they were, she chose you. You must satisfy her in that area and others as well.
    Focus on healing and these thoughts, fantasies and worries will start to fade.
     
  3. Hey man you can compensate that. Talking about dominance, confidence, muscles (not too big! Especially bulky abs and legs look shit on a small cock), looks, stamina, experience, toys, intelligence and money (if shes into it).

    And if she cheats or leaves you anyway, fuck it and get another.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  4. Wolfen

    Wolfen Fapstronaut

    Hey man, i had the same problems. You know what worked for me? You need to think for yourself, you need to be a bit selfish in some cases. This is you, and you want the best for you. Pleasure is not measured in cm for women believe me, and the past is gone. Porn is so bad, because put in you false convinction, where everything that's big is better. Leave this thoughts that hunts your life, you don't need this, and I'm sure that your girlfriend want your dick because it's your, not because it's big or small. Never give up and live better bro. Good luck
     
  5. Lilla_My

    Lilla_My Fapstronaut

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    I can assure you that if she is in love with you, she doesn't ever think of her exes junk or compare it to yours.

    A vagina doesn't change in size or shape even if someone has had 1000s of sex partners. The only thing that can change it is child birth.
     
  6. Lifelongaddict

    Lifelongaddict Fapstronaut

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    A lot of women will yell you their best partners weren’t the biggest or longest lasting ones, but the ones that took the most care of them. Kiss her, touch her, please her, before you even think about sex happening.
     
    Lilla_My, badteresa and girlfriendofm like this.
  7. girlfriendofm

    girlfriendofm Fapstronaut

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    As a woman I can assure you she is not thinking or even imagining them in any way when she is with you. I can’t speak for all but as a woman I know that my ex’s have been bigger than my current boyfriend but I enjoy him much more because of the love and the affection. Small or large it doesn’t matter. You both should be satisfied and if you feel that your not “big enough” don’t feel that way. Big isn’t always better. Use your mouth on her, most women can’t climax with just penetration we need clitoral stimulation. Be confident. She loves what you got.
     
  8. InnerFaith

    InnerFaith Fapstronaut

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    women love happy and energetic dicks, a little small a little big isn't that much of an issue, as long as they caught your atention its all good.
    she should worry about making you satisfied too.
     
  9. fapequalsdeath

    fapequalsdeath Fapstronaut

    when you buy a bottle of coke, do you want it nice and fresh or with 7 dicks in it?
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  10. zuzu123

    zuzu123 Fapstronaut

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    Well my girlfriend had multiple boyfriends and more than likely bigger penises than me. It disgusted me, she talked sometimes about her exes and why it failed. I didnt want to hear anything about or even watch pictures of her with her exes. Than recently she told me that she got raped by two guys when she was drunk at 16 years old. She never told anyone. She thought I would be supportive but instead I freaked out and said I would never see her the same way again. They got never punished for it and cant get this image out of my head. She even said that it was her own fault bcuz he drank too much....It is hard to deal with it but just try to forget and I will do so too.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  11. You know sometimes it helps to put his emotions to the side and think about it very sober. Okay you think you are not "masculine" enough? Lets say you are right so what ? What now ? What would it change? The bound that your partner chose you for you ? NO. Would she leave you for not having the greatest dick in this world? NO So what if you would be right with all your overthinking? What does it change it? Nothing. Everyone under a certain length should be ashamed and shouldn't get a gf? NO SO STOP OVERTHINKING MAN?! You are creating mental problems out of nowhere. Stop it! It's okay to be not perfect. Your partner doesn't expect that from you. You are adults not teenagers. Act like one! Throw those thoughts away with some good music :)
     
  12. Brown Boy

    Brown Boy Fapstronaut

    Deleted Account likes this.
  13. WhoCares101

    WhoCares101 Fapstronaut

    I have this same issue with my fiancee. she is my only partner, I am not her first. she was with lots of partners in high school, stemming from sexual trauma, and had several after high school, one being a 7 year relationship. I am by far the smallest guy she has been with and we both get frustrated during sex at times. she enjoys intercourse more than anything and certain positions that is impossible for me do do, she gets kinda bummed when we try and fail. it then sticks in my mind that all those other guys managed it just fine. hell, half the time I cant even tell where I'm at and when I finish she gets depressed that I was not in properly, blaming herself which kills me. sex had become more and more awkward in recent months because I can only do basically one position and i can tell she gets bored. then my mind gets filled with the other guys she has been with, good and bad, and it can cause relapses. and yes we yet other things and foreplay, I'm good at those things but her preferences are intercourse, penis and vigina.

    Not much help just sharing my experience being insanely small and having a fiancee with a long history with past partners. yes she chose, she said yes when I asked her to marry me, but I worry about sex in the future when things are already this awkward. we have both I think begun avoiding sex because of the awkwardness.
     
  14. TimeToQuitNow

    TimeToQuitNow Fapstronaut

    Porn is lowering your self esteem. Stop watching it
     
    IbrahimViking likes this.
  15. I've never thought about penis size and I don't believe it to be a reason for worry. However, I have thought about previous partners my gf has had. Whenever I'm on a good streak, I've become a lot more trusting and a lot less worried about past situations like that. I do believe NoFap will help, I noticed this during my last relapse. Once I relapsed, I began to have insecurities and my brain began to jumble up what is truth (having a loving, caring and wonderful girlfriend) to what pornography portrays which is the complete opposite.

    Keep it up with NoFap and you will soon begin to notice those insecurities and detrimental thoughts go away. As many have said before me, if the relationship is meant to be, she is going to be there for you, not because of your appendage. It's you who she wants, keep that in mind and keep trekking towards your goals.

    -Cheers
     
    IbrahimViking likes this.

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