Day 32 and still any image or news or article related to sexual....pulling me towards them like magnet and giving me some kind of nice feeling inside me. Somehow cutting out of that as soon as possible. Today's a bit disappointing day. Mood low from few days.
Day 12/90. I feel like I'm counting the days as a prisoner. Time goes by slowly I feel like it's been a lot more than 12 days. Probably because I think about NoFap for a few years now. My best streak is more than three weeks. The ending of the challenge is by the end of the summer. I think to myself, "I'm not gonna have fun this summer". Probably my addiction speaking.
Day 12 - Check In!! Today's Quote: You lose nothing when fighting for a cause ... In my mind the losers are those who don't have a cause they care about. - Mohammed Ali
DAY 3. I am officially on Day 3 today. The last time I mtb was in Hong Kong in a hotel room, all alone, lonely, tired from jobseeking, depressed. This time my goal is 100 days. In the past year I have PMO maybe once or twice every week on average.
Day 0 Time to deal with it. No more relapses. No more setbacks time to ends this thing. One by one, step by step iam going to complete this promise. No not perversion. don't let urges take over your mind. Build the fortress by putting one brick at a time. Be a man and complete your promise. Stop being a loser.
Start Date: Jan 25, 2019 Day 122/125 no PM (relapsed day 51, 70, 102) Day 23/90 consecutive no PM Day 125 no alcohol or caffeine Day 93 weight training I had a innocent dream 2 days ago that felt more erotic than it actually was by the time I woke up. I couldn't get the image out of my head most of yesterday and last night. When I went to bed, it was still there so sadly I gave myself permission to Google the image to see if I could see what I saw in my dream (a girl doing a headstand with her shirt falling over her face exposing her belly - no nudity). I came to my senses once I realized my brain was tricking me and making excuses to look for more novel pics once I was on line and in bed. I realized I was in addiction mode where I loose track of time and hyper focus so I put my phone away and tried arousing my wife for sex. She was too tired and had to work the next day so I stopped and just gave her no sensual back massage instead. I finally fell as sleep about 3am and am exhausted now writing about this stupid fucking addiction. I did not touch myself or orgasm last night so I am not considering this to be a relapse. It was a good wake up call on why it's not a good idea to give myself permission to look for images I see in dreams as it always escalates. Stay strong and proud friends.
Day 107 Hmm... noticed that porn in my life isn`t worthful anymore. I`m still scared to relapse or to go back in that addiction, but more and more days porn doesn`t become valuable, it`s like a time waste for me. Of course I feel sometimes still lonely but also my mind says: "Concentrade on now, take your time. Everything will be good". I`m also doing plans for this summer! A language summer course, an intership as a carpenter (unintentionally because my Dad took me there and thinks I must do it To AvOiD sO MucH tImE sPeNdInG oN tHe ScReEn) and 1 week with family near the sea. Welp still unmotivated for studying for school or go to the gym
relapsed again, binged again . but i know how it happened, why it happened. no worries brothers. sometimes i´m afraid of telling the forum my relapses because i´m afraid that it might encourage somebody to do the same, people praise me for being a good motivator and i´m scared if my relapses may trigger somebody. but at the same time i believe it´s very important to everyone being totally honest here. because that way we will learn and grow together. we show our true colors, our strenghts and weaknesses. No heroes here, just human beings struggling for a better life. i´m no different. Onwards my friends. We will do this.