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What do I do need advice ?

Discussion in 'Compulsive Sexual Behavior' started by seagulls6878, Apr 27, 2019.

  1. seagulls6878

    seagulls6878 Fapstronaut

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    I think I have fallen in love with a sex worker. What do I do ? I know it’s not healthy .... I’m just so lonely and she’s been there for me . Even if I have to pay her every time I see her.
     
  2. It sounds like loneliness is making you see something that isn't there. If you have to pay someone it's not love it is a business transaction.
    You need time in rocovery to get your mind straight brother.
     
  3. What's her thoughts on this matter? At the end of the day, it is between two persons. Everyone else and their opinion doesn't matter. It won't be easy, but if you two want it, you will make it work. Anyway, most likely, it's going to be a mirage. So, try and look at it objectively, and in my opinion, you should never trust somebody who is in love to make objective decisions, because most often, people still make emotional decisions, so you gotta be really careful about it. Hope it helps.
     
    Deleted Account and seagulls6878 like this.
  4. ClickClickBoom

    ClickClickBoom Fapstronaut

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    Shes not there for you, she is there for the money.
    You need to stop with this cycle your putting your self through. Desperation makes us see things that are not really there. Happens to us all at some point or another.

    But in the end of the day its all about you, have you consider the risks? Have you though it through? Is she realy the kind of person you want? Will she bring out the best in you or the worst in you?

    Also remember if you're unhappy alone what makes you think that if your with someone that will change? I mean sure that will be a temporary bandage for your problems but sooner or later they will resurface, you need to address the root of your problems first.
    True happiness comes from within and not for exterior sources.

    Stand strong
     
    Last edited: Apr 28, 2019
    seagulls6878 likes this.
  5. seagulls6878

    seagulls6878 Fapstronaut

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    Thank you everyone. I don’t know what to make of it. I’ve seen plenty of sex workers and this is the only one that has invited me on a trip with her or told me I could text her when I’m feeling down. Either way, I could just be a favorite client and nothing more than that .... a client. She did tell me one thing though. I asked her about her plans and how long she plans to do this. She said sometimes sex workers have clients that will offer to get them out cause they have a lot of money. She said maybe one day one of my clients will do that for me and smiled at me. I don’t know if she said that cause she wants me to come back to her more. Or if she wants me to work harder for that promotion so I can take care of her. These are things my friend said. I know it’s probably not healthy what I’m doing. Haven’t had a Gf in 6 years and idk I’m sad and in a bad place. She says yes this is a job and yes she likes the money but she’s not heartless. I don’t know what to make of it. She just does erotic massage there is no inter course between us. But conversation does flow. She said most of her clients are old and I’m the youngest. I’m 27 and she’s 30, I was thinking of asking her if she wanted to go to a baseball game with me but not sure if it’s the right thing to do. In the back of my mind I know I prob need to cut ties with her for my health. This is just so hard. When it feels like nobody cares about you and then you find someone that does , even though you pay them
     
  6. ClickClickBoom

    ClickClickBoom Fapstronaut

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    Come on man... look at what she is saying. That expectation is wrong of her in so many ways Why do you want to take care of her? What does she bring to the table besides giving you attention/validation.The way i look at it the fact that she lets you text her is just a prevervial hook and if she thows some validation your way so you will always be coming back for more. Let's call this securing a client

    No matter how you at it this is always be a transactional based relationship, you want sex and companionship and she wants money and someone to take care of her.

    Thats basically her life plan... someday someone will throw money at me and take care of me. Thats a huge red flag in my book.

    If you want to get promoted do it for yourself, do it so you can improve your lifestyle and your general well being and not for someone elses sake.

    In the end it all comes down to you. I know how you feel, but you need to make some positive changes in your life, take care of yourself, go join a gym, take some classes, eat clean wholesome foods, educate yourself there are alot of good self-help books out there, a good book can change you for the better, take up some new hobbys, doing new stuff will allow you to know people out of your own social circle.
    My point is you need to address your inner issues so that you can find peace of mind, happiness comes from within.


    I like to be direct so take my advice with a grain of salt.
    You're not alone in your struggle never forget that.
     
    Xander_ likes this.
  7. seagulls6878

    seagulls6878 Fapstronaut

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    I appreciate the advice. Like I said when you haven’t heard nice things in so long it just feels good even when your paying someone. I think she can pick up on it. The longest I went without seeing her was 4 months then I fell back into it. I realize that all she has done is strip and do this. She has no work experience and having someone take care of her is really her only way out of it. I know that in the back of my mind. I need to get clean and continue my reset. Years ago I would have never wanted some girl like this. How my mind has changed. I mean I’m sure it does happen where a client with tons of money will take them out of the life. I know though that isn’t love. I’m gonna be at work she gonna be at the mall maxing out my credit card
     
  8. ClickClickBoom

    ClickClickBoom Fapstronaut

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    Your young, you got the rest of you life ahead of you, don't put "the girl" on the pedestal, your clearly a smart individual and you know what needs to be done, take control of your emotions, fix what you can about youself create a good environment and the right women will eventually show up in your life and if your a more mature person by then the chances will be in your favor.

    One day at a time my friend
     
    seagulls6878 likes this.
  9. g2stop

    g2stop Fapstronaut

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    She is a prostitute, why do you want to be with a woman who is both emotionally and physically damaged. If you feel damaged and lonely you need to work on yourself or get counselling.
     
    seagulls6878 likes this.
  10. seagulls6878

    seagulls6878 Fapstronaut

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    Well the thing is I have pied. I can’t really hve sex at will it has to be planned so I can take my pill
     
  11. That's where the reboot comes in. Give yourself the gift of the 90 days and see where your mind is and where you are physically as well.
     
  12. seagulls6878

    seagulls6878 Fapstronaut

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    Around 14 days I get a craving like I’ve never experienced in my life
     

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