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Tinder and Bumble.. Are they are good thing for a No fapper?

Discussion in 'Dating during a Reboot' started by IDabbleInPoetry, Mar 18, 2019.

  1. IDabbleInPoetry

    IDabbleInPoetry Fapstronaut

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    Hey guys.

    I am a really shit no fapper. I am getting better with longer gaps between my relaspes and am feeling confident about quiting and improving my life.

    Anyways. I don't know if tinder and bumble are going to be good for me. Not only is it super easy, I am also exposing myself to lots of images of girls, some in arousing clothes. So it is no surprise I get aroused when I use these apps and talk to girls in this setting. Are dating apps a good idea? Also since I have dropped out of Uni I don't really get to meet girls anymore. Any ideas for that issue as well? All advice and comments are appreciated.
     
  2. Skins23

    Skins23 Fapstronaut

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    I’m new but I’d say add the dating apps to your reboot. After being in support groups for this issue I’d hear people talk about those apps and how they’re triggering.
     
  3. Depends on how weak you are (I don't mean that in a mean way haha)

    If you can scroll through profiles and not get aroused, try it. But if you think you'd get turned on, or at least some sexual thought will come into your head, maybe it's best to stay off it for a while. But overall it really depends
     
    YellowPig, 1978 and IDabbleInPoetry like this.
  4. 1978

    1978 Fapstronaut

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    I find myself getting turned on a bit when swiping through profiles. Some of the women are really hot! It can be a bit frustrating, but for me personally it's not enough to cause me to lose control and fap. Personally I think the potential benefit outweighs the risk, but it's something that each person needs to judge for themselves. If you think that seeing women in tight short skirts will cause you to fap, it might be best to stay away.
     
  5. IDabbleInPoetry

    IDabbleInPoetry Fapstronaut

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    I've deleted the app twice in the last month ahaha I don't think its a good idea for me right now. I am really struggling to get off the ground with this. I want a sex life but I don't think I will have a very effective one if I am sitting at 0-3 days with the previous problems I have had. I am going to stop using it until I reach 50 days I think. by then I should be in a better frame of mind
     
  6. Hmm I guess you can consider it soft p if you catch yourself staring at the girls too much. Like the other guy said, I think I am too weak to keep using tinder while doing no PMO. As for meeting girls, you could always go out and meet them in the club or something, but that's not what I do as I don't like to go out. You could join something like a cooking club or another club at your uni or start a new sport to meet new people. If it doesn't work out finding a girl there at least you will have made male friends probably so you can't go wrong. Note: I am 20 years old and haven't been in a relationship so keep that in mind as you take my advice :p
    Anyways stay strong man! Let's not give in to things like tinder and beat this addiction!
     
  7. IDabbleInPoetry

    IDabbleInPoetry Fapstronaut

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    Meeting girls is hard for me right now. I have had relationships and don't struggle talking to people or approaching but I don't have the exposure. I recently dropped out of Uni and I am yet to get a license that permits me to drive by myself, so its really hard to get out or commit to stuff that will expose me to girls.

    I need to get all that sorted so I can join a gym and maybe a rock climbing club or hiking or something so I can meet some like minded people not only so I can get some friends outside of those from school, but also so I can meet girls that do the things I enjoy. Also one of my biggest insecurities is being an 18yr old that can't drive. Makes me feel unsuited for courting the ladies ya know ahaha
     
  8. 1978

    1978 Fapstronaut

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    Haha, don't stress too much about it. I didn't get my driving license until I was 24.
     
  9. IDabbleInPoetry

    IDabbleInPoetry Fapstronaut

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    I need the drivers license to sign up for the police. So it's holding me back in more ways than one.
     
  10. Dr. Mario

    Dr. Mario Fapstronaut

    Sounds like you have a lack of confidence in general. People tend to attract other people that are at a similar level of health--or unhealth. This extends to mental as well.

    I'd say, spend this time now to build your self-control and confidence. The first will increase the second, and it's no secret that the second is super attractive. Then when you're confident, it'll be easier to attract the healthier women I'm sure you'd prefer anyway.

    Tinder is just gonna make you relapse right now, too many thots. Can't say I know anything about Bumble other than "we're Tinder but feminist"
     
  11. IDabbleInPoetry

    IDabbleInPoetry Fapstronaut

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    I am confident, but not sexually. I can introduce myself to anyone, I have given speeches in front over a thousand people but I have issues with my sexual health that I have experienced before, and it really discourages my desire for intimacy.
     
  12. Dr. Mario

    Dr. Mario Fapstronaut

    That's good! You don't have as far to go then.
     
  13. Brazilianlearner

    Brazilianlearner Fapstronaut

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    Can u talk more about your sexual problems? You're annonymous anyway.
     
  14. Brazilianlearner

    Brazilianlearner Fapstronaut

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    Can u talk more about your sexual problems? You're annonymous anyway.
     
  15. Reborn16

    Reborn16 Fapstronaut

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    On where to meet girls: Markets are great, usually groups of girls who are chilled there. Libraries and book stores. Volunteering (way more females in this demographic, and better conversation starters). The beach. The local mall.

    It's easier said than done. But walking up and introducing yourself to 10 girls while you happen to be doing your shopping etc. in the above areas, is a lot more efficient than 10 hours with online dating.

    Think about it, looking at the profile pics and waiting hours for replies. Or approach and know very quickly if she's into you or not.

    I realise the approach anxiety can be tough these days, as seemingly no guys risk it. But you said it yourself, you're confident in meeting people. Just seems like the more logical approach and better to keep away from technology with dating. :emoji_thumbsup:
     
  16. Queen_Of_Hearts_13

    Queen_Of_Hearts_13 Fapstronaut

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    I feel like dating apps just feed into the novelty that PMO feeds into. When someone is rebooting, that means they are trying to rewire their brain to humans, so maybe trying to meet people in person at events would be better for rebooting.
     
    k0nn3ct and Reborn16 like this.
  17. YellowPig

    YellowPig Fapstronaut

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    Go hardmode at least 30 to 90 days. Then you be the judge. I personally don’t think this is a good idea though.
     
  18. Capt. U

    Capt. U Fapstronaut

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    For me I am personally staying off them till I complete other personal goals which could take months. Then after that I will consider re-activating my account. They were really triggering at the beginning because some chicks like to sext or you might bump onto some nudies. Which can cause a relapse.
     
  19. 241CesarAugusto

    241CesarAugusto Fapstronaut

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    HEllo,
    This is my first post, but I think the subject is right into my wheel house.
    My main addiction is get aroused, all day along, and what i used the most are dating apps, particularly badoo; dont know about you guys but I'm brazillian and here lots of girl use pics of their butts, breats, almost naked, and at badoo in the private album most are naked; great app to get a quick fuck, horrible opion if you have lust problems. Tinder is kind of less extreme, but the pics can get one aroused really easy also.
    I started out just unstaling badoo, let tinder on, but every time i go to tinder i feel and urge and really have to fight against it, so for me it is best to skip those apps entirelly, for now.
     
  20. Sunny321

    Sunny321 Fapstronaut

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    We all have difficult days. At this time, the support of loved ones is necessary.
     

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