I feel like I'm permanently damaged

Dont worry...i'm there...i started fantasizing to porn at age 14....suffered from wetdreams from age 16-26....now i'm 29....last 4 years wetdreams frequency stopped.... so how you battle this,,,,?????? ans- years of fantasizing...u r were addicted to thoughts....lot of hormonal changes........trust me...you cant fight it.....porn,fantasizing,masturbation,wetdreams are your enemies........so accept the truth, that your enemy is powerful and you cant fight him.......if you try to fight with him and touch with him, he will overthrow you as you were addict.....so how to fight enemy???? since you cant win...RUN FROM ENEMY......STAY AWAY FROM ALL THINGS WHICH TRIGGER YOU LIKE PORN, WOMEN SENSUAL PICS, LUSTFUL THOUGHTS ETC......AT THE SAME TIME, OCCUPY YOUR THOUGHTS WITH OTHER BUSY THINGS.....YOU SHOULD BE SO BUSY THAT YOU DONT HAVE TIME TO THINK ABOUT WOMEN...PUT YOURSELF IN SUCH SITUATION.....EXAMPLE- I WORKED FROM 2012-2014...WITH MONEY, I VISITED PROSTITUTES...BUT I LEFT JOB IN 2015-2018, NO MONEY TO VISIT PROSTITUTES...I PUT MY MIND IN STUDIES...BUSY WITH THEM.......SLOWLY FANTASIZING GONE IN 4 YEARS...BUT STILL I OCCASIONALLY STRUGGLE........SO BE BUSY, STUDY BOOKS, READ NOVELS, DO WORK, SOCIALIZE, GO TO GYM, EMDITATION, YOGA.....NEVER BE ALONE.........EAT MODERATELY...PRACTISE GRATITUDE.......ONLY SINCERE ATTEMPTS WORK....YOU CANT FAKE IT

 

no it won't, ur brain needs 2 years to rewire just like in heroin addicts, lately I've been feeling some sensation in the left side of my head when fapping few times a day, think i'm frying my brain too much with novelty and i am which scares me. I feel like u, the damage is done, but what is the alternative? make it worse? try and fight thisa fucking sdhit

 

I can relate to this. I really don't think you and I are unusual in having such thoughts. They are bizarre and disturbing. I find that the difference between this being a major issue or not is whether you dwell on those initial questions. Perhaps you can see yourself as on a diet of the mind. When an option you do not want comes around, just move onto another subject. I realise this takes effort and is ultimately wearing. But I have found the frequency and intensity does reduce a bit over time. Don't beat yourself up over it my friend. We are sexual beings and this is part of the deal, or so it seems. Take care.

 

Abstain for at least 90 days

 

I think this addiction to porn / sexual fantasy even sex is so powerful. It takes hold of different people different ways and some of us have more unhealthy emotions or mental health problems maybe that really amplify the temptation and addiction. It’s just how we are wired we are all wired very similarly but each of us is different and what triggers the temptations and thoughts may be a greater challenge for some of us but phiysical touch M or porn may be a greater challenge for others. It’s all to the same end though we want the power and pleasure of secual things and O along with the rush of dopemine etc. You just need to know what makes you tick. What makes you act how you do and want what you do. The good and bad reasons ... be honest and find what works best for you. What works for me may be totally different than someone else. If I don’t like chocolate it’s not tempting to me but if you absolutely love chocolate it can easily be a temptation. We all have to learn what the things are that trigger our temptations and just be honest about them accept them and learn from them as best as we can so we can be better equipped to handle it when it happens. I don’t know if I am saying this the right way but I understand what you are describing and it’s a challenge for many of us. Talk it through with people you can trust that may help some. I wish you well stick with the reboot as many times as you need to as many days as you need to until you get stronger it’s like lifting weights. The more you do it the stronger you get. Good luck!!