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Binge drinking once or twice a week? - I want to cut down

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Tankus, Feb 10, 2019.

  1. Tankus

    Tankus Fapstronaut

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    I think I'd like to cut down on my binge drinking. The problem is that it's so damn fun, you make genuine connections with people and women, dance and it unlocks feelings and subconscious things that I don't think would come out otherwise. You also get so many funny stories from drinking.

    But I think once or twice a week, (I'd say roughly a full bottle of 40% spirits), is far too much. Every single one of my friends is a drinker though too, so that mixed with the positives I find in drinking makes it really hard.

    I don't want to quit completely, but I'd just like it if I could get to a nice level of drunkness and then stay at that level or slowly simmer down off that. I think that extra dopamine though kicks in and I end up drinking a lot. Never to blackout drunk or anything like that but still a significant amount.

    Any tips/ advice/ thoughts? Maybe I should set a timer on my phone or someshit idk
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  2. Binge drinking is no good for you at all, ever. If you have to get drunk to enjoy yourself, you're doing it wrong.

    If you make a connection while drunk, that's not a "genuine" connection — it's a drug-induced connection. You and the other party are not your normal selves, so how can that be a genuine connection?

    You can unlock your inhibitions and make genuine connections when fully sober. If you don't know how to be uninhibited without alcohol, it means that you have some emotional problems (that's normal for very many people). In such a case, what you want is to figure our your problems and solve them instead of drowning them in alcohol.

    I used to be like you, believing that a person had to get drunk to enjoy themselves. When I sorted out my mind, I quickly went off alcohol. I never planned to; it just happened, because I found that my new self was enjoying life so much that getting drunk was interfering with it. Sure, my friends teased me for not drinking when we went out, but hey, I enjoyed myself even more than they did, and the next day I had no hangover and felt great!

    Something for you to think about.
     
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  3. Tankus

    Tankus Fapstronaut

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    How did you reach this point?
     
  4. I wish that I could say, "Oh, it's easy, just [whatever]." But it's a journey.

    I did therapy. Lots of therapy. I actually trained in it; and practiced what I preached.

    Also, in my 20's, I read a poster describing different types of alcoholism (once-a-week bingeing; drinking even a small amount every day of the week; and others, I forget now). I realised with a shock that I was an alcoholic.

    When doing therapy, taking it seriously, and doing your homework, it starts to work pretty fast. The changes to my life, which continue to this day almost 40 years later, were enormous, especially in the beginning.

    You would be advised to look at different types of therapy, because each therapy works for some people and not others, and for some problems and not others. I didn't stick to just one type. Below is a list of therapies that I've posted elsewhere. They aren't the only ones by any means, so feel free to look for others. Try as many of them as you can afford (not all at the same time, though), because some will help you and others will make no difference. I've done almost all of them, and continue to do some of them as "homework".

    Ask your GP; counselling; meditation; yoga; CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy); hypnotherapy; mindfulness; NLP (neuro-linguistic programming); matrix reimprinting; systemic constellations; clinical psychology; EFT (emotional freedom technique); reiki.

    As I say, there are more, so look around. It's quite possible that I've even forgotten some that I've done. Having written that, I've just remembered that I've also had massage therapy (by a professional, not in a massage parlour!), reflexology and Indian head massage. I'll bet that I've forgotten still more.

    It sounds overwhelming at the start, but believe me, it's well worth the journey. Stick to bite-sized therapy if that makes you more comfortable.
     
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  5. DaveHana

    DaveHana Fapstronaut

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    @OP what is your age? Many peers in my age bracket (late 30's) have found that their bodies can't tolerate binge drinking any more. When I got deeper into my 30's a binge night will destroy me for a full 24-48 hours depending on the serverity of the binge. So you have that to look forward to as a last resort. In the meantime, @Mordobarn had some awesome tips to take action on now.
     
    Tankus likes this.
  6. TheLastDab

    TheLastDab Fapstronaut

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    There’s no techniques to control binge drinking. It’s an addictive behaviour; which is why one drink leads to two more and so on. A regular person is fully in control of the amounts they drink and knows when to stop. I’m certain you’d like to slow down, but only quitting would work. Alcohol is not classified as a drug, but if you look at stats more then 15 million people in U.S suffer with an alcohol disorder. Best choice is to quiet while your ahead, I’ve been sober 1.5 years and the benefits are substantial. You will thank yourself, best of luck.
     
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  7. Tankus

    Tankus Fapstronaut

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    Thanks man for the extended response, much appreciated. I will definitely look into these, the problem is therapy is expensive here ($100 per hour). I'll try to find some online resources. At the moment I do mindfulness and meditation a lot, it helps, but I find when I'm in a great mood and heading to a party I just feel like getting lit to elevate everything even further. I don't get anywhere near as drunk as I used to and I think I'm on generally a good path of decreasing it, that's why I'm here asking this, so I think I'll keep pushing it and keep decreasing.

    I understand this, however I've seen so many of my friends that as they've aged they've decreased their drinking a lot and become healthier, but they can still kick back and enjoy a beer or a rowdy night out if the time calls for it. That's the state I want to be at.

    I am 24 though so my age bracket still goes pretty hard. Social situations without alcohol are rare in Australia.
     
  8. Uh… yes, it is! It might be legal (in most countries), but it's still a recreational drug.
     
  9. Angus McGyver

    Angus McGyver Fapstronaut

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    That's exactly what I thought back in the day and it was the main reason for why I started to drink in the first place (despite not liking the taste of alcohol or its effect on me). There might have been some temporary fun from doing it but overall alcohol hasn't contributed to anything positive in my life, just more of hangovers, regrets, anxiety, and loss of connection and self-respect.
    Also, the people you generally meet at bars are usually (most of the time) not the type of people that become friends for life (even less girlfriends) as they don't have much going on in their lives but drinking and partying during the weekends.
    When you drink, you tend to become someone else (your non-genuine self) as you connect with others but that congruence will be lost as soon as you stop drinking and so will the newly formed friendship.

    I have not been binge-drinking for 14 months and haven't even touched a beer for almost five weeks and tend to never do for as long as I live.
     
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  10. TheLastDab

    TheLastDab Fapstronaut

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    No one said it wasn’t a recreational drug, anything that’s addictive is a drug. But, it’s not classified as any scheduled drug. Which is why it’s legal and social acceptable.
     
  11. Fair enough, it's not a scheduled drug. But it's still a drug. Useful for surgery, but not for your insides :)
    Not all drugs are addictive, interestingly, at least according to the medical definition of addiction.
     

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