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Does corporal punishment cause/induce homosexuality?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by AnmysUser18312, Dec 16, 2018.

Does corporal punishment cause/induce homosexuality?

  1. Yes, it does.

    0 vote(s)
    0.0%
  2. Maybe/possibly.

    15.4%
  3. No, they are not related.

    46.2%
  4. No, they are not related and homosexuality is a natural trait.

    38.5%
  1. AnmysUser18312

    AnmysUser18312 Fapstronaut

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    Related: https://www.nofap.com/forum/index.p...y-homosexuality-status-to-normal-back.203310/

    Extract from the thread above:
    "It all started when I was attracted by a tall man who came to install Internet connection for my house the first time, when I was 7 years old that time. I was amazed by his height. That was the beginning of my sexual life. (Yes, you didn't read it wrong, I'm a male/boy and attracted by this man) Surprising, isn't it? I am never attracted/interested to any women/girl/female and I never masturbated on any women/female before. Whenever I look at women/pictures of them, I even think my penis seem to shrink. Not very sure... After that, I had naughty thoughts such as "wow, that man is so tall", I admired about being tall, then I started to fantasize about my own body and wanted to be tall like him too. Then I jumped at school during recess time to try to achieve that goal. I seem to have naturally have the knowledge of masturbating then later and later I discovered the act of it. So, one day, after kept thinking of such dirty thoughts, my hand held my penis and keep moving it up and down and at the end felt some pleasure. It felt like so fun/nice, so I continued doing this act of masturbating (just like everyone else). This is how I began masturbating.

    Let me try to be simple here on what's come next: over the time, I have been masturbating/sexually attracted or aroused to stuff like: "my own body parts such as arms after I look at my own body and learnt about it", "my face with clear skin that time/no scars", "my legs with nice skin and I'm proud of its current height", "my arms skin flawless", basically my own body (male body). Later, as time passes, I seem to be attracted to see any boy/men, especially those as the same race as me, including my self, and have dirty thoughts on their/my own body parts including the face. The naughty thoughts would usually be "wow, their skin is so clear/nice, no scars, their teachers/parents didn't slap/beat/pinch them before", etc. I would masturbate on these stuff. This is my main sexual attraction. Over the years until now, the dirty thoughts would be "about my own body not getting beaten, slapped,pinched by parents/classmates/teachers/etc., lack of scars as seen on my visible body parts like arms, palm", "my face is never slapped", "I wish my face is flawless and perfect" etc..


    Before doing NoFap, I used to download photos of many pictures of many teenagers boy and adult men of same race as me that I come across online (including Facebook) and saved them into a folder and masturbate on them. I also have dirty thinkings such as wishing myself 100% no scars on all body parts/never get beaten/etc."

    However, when I was age 7 and first time got attracted to the tall man (Dec 2009), I was only beaten in the face one time (around June 2009). This may give a clue that I am naturally gay which made me attracted to the tall man and not caused by corporal punishment? I remember during that time I kept admiring/fantasizing about the height only though. The next year, when I was 8 years old, I frequently get slapped/beaten on the face very often by my mother. I got beaten on the face the most. Not sure about other body parts though, I think there were several times on other body parts too. Teachers would cane the palm and butt from my observation.

    Don't you guys think my sexual thoughts are kind of related to corporal punishment? Looks like my brain got mistaken as "corporal punishment actions (slap/punch/beat/smack/spank/punch/etc.) " with "sexual intercourse" thus making me having these types of horny thoughts and keep fantasizing about flawless/no scar skin? Is there such thing? Besides, my horny thoughts about body parts are also only to men because my brain thinks men are usually more "naughty" and feels good to beat while women are so timid. (my 1st hypothesis) Or I probably forced my penis to erect when I feel attracted to men when I was small which made me gay. Possible too, right? Maybe I did it without myself being aware of it as I was still small. Hope you get what I mean. So weird, right? I'm really not sure whether there is a relation but from several sources I read that homosexuality has nothing to do with parenting styles, early childhood experiences and the way someone is raised. I also read that it's not our hoice but rather a natural part of us.

    I also seem to admire men with perfect flawless face and dream my face to be same as them. My face is currently no longer flawless as it used to be and have acne which my brain keeps suspecting it is a result of permanent side effect of beating/frequent slapping when I was small. Every time my mum beats, she doesn't just slap one time and let it go. She would usually non-stop continously beating my face, I'm not sure how many times exactly but like 10-20 times in 1 or 2 minutes. I also get horny to arms, legs, body, etc. *sigh* 2nd hypothesis is the corporal punishment made my brain fear my skin has scars so it would be sexually attracted to flawless skin of people same gender/race as me.


    What are your opinions about the paragraphs above? Do you think homosexuality is related to corporal punishment as they injure the flawless handsome skin which made me sexually aroused/interested to them? But at first I was attratced by height...hmm...really not sure.

    I feel sad to be gay, anyway. I always worry about my future about whether I will be able to have children or not as according to science a man has to do sexual intercourse with a woman. Hmm... if my penis cant get erect when I see a women, how is this possible?

    My strategy to overcome this would be probably:
    (1) Can my gay problem be cured if I quit and avoid looking and avoid sexual arousal at photos of boy/men/myself/my own body parts but instead begin to watch pictures of woman porn online everyday and force my penis to erect towards those photos and train/force myself to be sexually aroused to women? Maybe this will rewire my brain plasticity and change my sexual orientation.


    (2) Search for pornography pictures/videos of girls/women online then force myself to be aroused and force my penis to get an erection. I think this will train my brain to become sexually attracted to women due to repeated sexual stimuli/arousal to women (by keep masturbating to them). DOES ANYONE THINKS THIS IS THE MOST EFFECTIVE AND LOGIC SOLUTION? I believe so since masturbation makes us addicted to it and increase our urge/sexual drive thus by repeated masturbation to women, it may change our sexual orientation. But I thought masturbation is a bad thing as it damages health, lose nutrient by ejaculation, etc. Does anyone support me to masturbate just for the sake of rewiring my sexual orientation?

    (3) L
    ook/stare at my own body parts such as my arm, leg, etc. when having sex with a woman, since I get sexually aroused with body parts of a male (which is myself). This would make me get an erection. Is this a good idea?

    Does anyone agree with any of the solutions above?

    Which solution do you think will work?

    For (1), I have thought that if I abstain/stop/restrain myself from looking photos of boys/men and my own body parts for a long time and begin to search for photos of women and force my penis to get erect, will this eventually get rid of my homosexuality and change me to heterosexual and at the same time rewire my brain/train it to become sexually attracted to women? I'm not sure whether this goal is possible or not since my penis never automatically react when looking at girls before.

    For (2), the logic is my penis would get erect when looking at myself/my own body parts such as arms and legs, therefore if I can't get horny to women but still want to have biological children, I can just look at myself (my arms/legs) to make myself sexually aroused and get an erection during the sexual intercourse which makes it possible?

    For (3), I believe repeated training/instillation of sexual arousal/orgasm to women will rewire/reprogram my brain to be attracted to women instead of men. After keep repeating, my brain will think "oh, it's a girl, *turns horny and gets an erection*.

    ANOTHER SOLUTION: Can any of you teach me some knowledge/information (relating to sexual attraction) about how to be sexually aroused/attracted to girls/women? I believe my brain lacks this knowledge and teaching me such knowledge can help me to be able to be get "turned on" by women and thus curing my homosexuality.

    Hope you read the strategies I mentioned above and analyze whether any of them will work. Please tell me your opinions, especially on solution (2)-masturbating. I need them to help me make decision whether I should do so or not as I'm extremely scared of masturbating after quitting it for many months. I read that masturbation is one of the worst things, so many negative and ill effects. I'm so paranoid about masturbation right now that I feel like I will destroy/ruin my life forever and have permanent side effects to my life if I ever masturbate again. I'm quite a paranoid person since recently. Maybe my brain gets anxious easily nowadays.
     
    Last edited: Dec 25, 2018
  2. Try not to overanalyze. Clearly you've masturbated to men but so what? I have too, can't even get it up seeing the most gorgeous women on a screen but when in real life I'm with a woman I'll get hard without any problems, whereas I won't with men. I've completely inverted my sexuality in fantasy as opposed to real life and these fantasies will always mess with your mind. They make you over-analyze and doubt. Perhaps the most arousing thing about fantasy is that you can imagine doing something you wouldn't necessarily like in real life. Does that make sense? Porn has made me think I'm gay, convinced me of this "fact" even but when I would meet up with a man for sex I'd always walk away, simply because porn/fantasy and real life are direct opposites. In that moment you discover your true self. Dealing with actual people is much different from dealing with the things you'll see on a screen. Just because you masturbate to certain masculine traits or body parts doesn't mean you are gay. It is a different story however if you could imagine yourself being in a long term sexual or romantical relationship with another man. Anything else is just curiosity and a logical consequence of seeing too much porn (classical conditioning and associations involving sexual stimulation and pleasure).
    In the real world, the best test for you would be to figure out who you'd like to kiss: girl or boy?
     
  3. AnmysUser18312

    AnmysUser18312 Fapstronaut

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    Anyone else have an idea about my case?
     
  4. DaveHana

    DaveHana Fapstronaut

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    My friend, I am very sympathetic to your plight. My opinion is that these questions are too complex to be answered on this, or any, internet forum. However, I also don't think that you'll find the answers that you are looking for without help. Might I suggest discussing this openly with a well trained psychologist in therapy? You could initially seek the consultation of multiple different therapists so that you have a range of perspectives and then choose one who is a good fit for you. I wish you much luck bruv.
     
  5. Psychologists are too objective. If you tell them you masturbate thinking about men it will be a done deal for them. But the human mind simply is too complex to make that kind of conclusion, especially in the case of porn addiction. What you describe has many of the typical characteristics that are associated with fetishes. Some will escalate into transwoman porn for others it will be gay porn or men. That's just the way it is, after a certain point in time porn addiction will escalate into these types of things.

    Start with reading this: https://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/can-you-trust-your-johnson/
     
  6. AnmysUser18312

    AnmysUser18312 Fapstronaut

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    Hmm..you are right. Probably what I'm experiencing are called "fetishes".
     
  7. Sure, think about it, porn is always made in such a way that it involves super focused blowjobs and foreplay that is never about the women, so after a while of seeing that you'll have trained your brain to associate dicks or whatever you're focusing on with pleasure. To make matters worse men are depicted as gods in these videos and women as trash. The woman is always being extremely submissive. So your sexual imagination is pushed in a certain direction and you'll eventually end up fantasizing about gay sex. In psychology this is called classical conditioning. This can snowball because of the novelty chasing. I know it has for me.
    Here's a similar theory...
    https://www.2knowmyself.com/How_watching_Porn_can_make_you_gay
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  8. AnmysUser18312

    AnmysUser18312 Fapstronaut

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    Does this mean I can get rid of my "gay" and be cured eventually if I make efforts to do so such as restraining myself from sexual arousal to men but begin to search for girls porn pictures and continuously force/encourage myself to be aroused/attracted to it? To be honest my body/brain never automatically reacted to be sexually aroused to women before. I wish to solve this problem now.
     
  9. Don't watch porn again man... see, this is the problem. You can completely rewire your brain in front of screens. I've desensitized myself enough to not get a boner from seeing 2D women on a screen, on the other hand can get hard with women in real life. So what does that tell you? My sexuality is completely inverted online. In the last years of my active porn addiction I had sissy hypno fetish and masturbated almost exclusively to the men in straight porn. Never even liked gay porn. Every type of porn can seriously mess you up. It starts with playboy or vanilla, but once the dopamine hit isn't enough anymore your brain starts looking for more shocking, arousing things, that is exactly how fetishes develop. Just stick to real life would be my advise. That's the only way of finding out your natural, innate sexuality and developing normal and healthy desires.
     
  10. Woodland-Soul

    Woodland-Soul Fapstronaut

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    There is nothing wrong with being gay its a insult to think so. Its like saying being arab is wrong and you want to wish the Arab away. Its self hatred or hatred.

    If the porn made you gay somehow ok that's wrong but just stop watching porn and you'll soon find out. Who knows you may be bisexual.
     
  11. AnmysUser18312

    AnmysUser18312 Fapstronaut

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    I think being gay is wrong as it means I can't biologically reproduce children. I don't want to adopt children and wish to have true biological children of my own.
     
  12. Do these fantasies come and go in your case? Have you fantasized about women at all?
    I'm quite certain that years of pmo addiction is going to result in estrogen overload in men eventually. This is just a thought but I believe that hormonal imbalances may be responsible for these fantasies, at least partially. I was very low in T the last time they checked. I'm going to try a natural estradiol blocker and will see what it does.
     
  13. AnmysUser18312

    AnmysUser18312 Fapstronaut

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    No, I never fantasized about woman before but I had quit porn and masturbation, I am also trying my best to put in efforts to get rid of my gay and making me heterosexual (attracted to woman), I even keep psychologically encouraging myself and my brain to be attracted to woman. So far I never get horny and I guess I will wait and see what will happen one day.
     
  14. Woodland-Soul

    Woodland-Soul Fapstronaut

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    Being gay isn't wrong.

    You can't force yourself to be straight.
     
  15. If in real life you like men you can't get rid of the gay but if it's porn induced you should fight it that's for sure. Question is do you like men in real life, can you imagine kissing one or marrying one?
     
  16. AnmysUser18312

    AnmysUser18312 Fapstronaut

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    I think being gay is wrong in a way especially from biological/reproduction aspect because being gay means I probably can't have true biological children of my own. I don't want to adopt children as I don't believe they are truly my own children.
     
  17. AnmysUser18312

    AnmysUser18312 Fapstronaut

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    I only purely admire flawless skin of men like arms, face, legs, which sounds quite strange and unusual type of homosexuality/fetish. That's why I suspect maybe it's somehow environment influenced (such as corporal punishment like beating/slapping) or porn/pictures induced. My penis gets erect/turn on when I see those. However, from a romantic point of view, I feel that kissing or marrying one is quite disgusting and ill. I hope one day I can become heterosexual. I hope one day I will get erections/turned on by women/girls.
     
  18. Then you aren't gay. Fetishes are often about body parts, whether this is a male body part or female body part or even something unisex like feet, it really doesn't mean anything in terms of sexual orientation. Porn and fantasy can cause this type of objectification, yourbrainonporn refers to it as artificial sexuality (porn induced). If you don't want to kiss a guy or want an emotional relationship with a man, you aren't gay. Simple. At least not in the strictest sense of the word. You could still be bi but chances of that are also small. Sexual fantasy doesn't necessarily have to mean anything if it's about your same gender. Women have same sex fantasies all the time, or so I've heard. What matters most in terms of figuring out your orientation is who you want to marry, kiss, date... that sort of thing. The rest is just your brain getting a kick out of these taboo subjects.
     
  19. AnmysUser18312

    AnmysUser18312 Fapstronaut

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    Another reason my brain only has fetishes of flawless/scarless skin of body parts of the male gender of the same race as me are male/boys are the naughty gender and those the same race as me has a nice/perfect skin color to my perception. Hmm... you are right. Could be just fetishes and not related to sexual orientation. I think if I change my mindset somehow and continuously psychologically encouraging myself then probably/hopefully 1 day I can get an erection/turned on by woman/girls. Quitting porn/masturbation helps the recovery process too I guess.
     
    Deleted Account likes this.
  20. Well, if you're ever with a girl in real life, just the two of you, you will know. If you're truly heterosexual you will get a real life sexual response from smelling, kissing and touching that girl. Notice how many more senses your brain makes use of to interpret a situation in real life. This is why porn is so damaging, it merely activates the visual circuitry, something that is capable of easily arousing men (as opposed to women), thereby easily hijacking your brain and causing a lot of obsessions and doubts. Some scientists are calling this the erototoxic pathway. You simply cannot determine your sexual orientation in front of a screen, or even by using your fantasy which is already highly influenced by porn. In any case, you'll find out one day, but it will be in the real world.
     

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