after 110 days fetishes faded away, but depression hit so hard

I think there is no much you can do exept being patient and wait. Time heals and depression must ease with time. For me depression hit after 200 days of 'hardmode' and it was so bad that I needed to start taking antidepressants again. I also had strong anxiety attacks. It's improved since then, but I still don't feel healed.

 

I'm at day 200 and it has been mostly hell, with depression and suicidal thoughts most of the times.
The last 2\3 weeks has been a little better, but yesterday and today i feel high depression kicking in again.

 

Honestly i don't have a way, it's just shit...

 

For me it came suddenly too. I see the lack of motivation to do anything more like anhedonia.

Did you had depression episodes before you abstained from porn?

 

I think depression gets worse in fall and winter because people stay in home and get no sunlight and vitamin D
https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases...fective-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20364651

 

If you never had a depression before it is very possible that it's withdrawals from porn. Give yourself some time, the depression itself is cyclical and it must ease with time. But if you won't see any progress in the coming weeks or it will go worse search for professional help then. I started to take antidepressants as I was feeling so bad that I could barely function and get out of bed.

 

The same for me.

The idea i have now, is that pmo has always cover my depression, non that i on't have pmo anymore, i have to face the issues and he depression i didn't face in 20 years.

 

How are you feeling now?

 

You can always consult a psychologist. If PMO covered your illness, then most likely it will not fade by itself.

 

I still have mild depression, but it's not that bad as it was last winter/spring. I still feel lots of anxiety, but I tolerate anxiety more easy than depression. So overall I see the improvement. I don't know what is more important here, time or antidepressants I'm taking, but I feel I'm moving to the right direction, albeit very slow.