To all you socially awkward and socially anxious people. This is for you.

YOU ARE NOT INHERENTLY AWKWARD OR ANXIOUS! THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT POINT THAT YOU NEED TO KNOW!

Your brain is like a computer, and like a computer, your brain has programs which have been installed from birth, through infancy, right the way up through puberty into your adulthood. Before birth, your brain was virtually empty, like a blank sheet of paper waiting to be wrote on. All of your programming has come from your environment. This is very important. None of it has come from inside you. Also, like a computer, your brain is susceptible to hardware faults. Are you your software, or hardware, or both?

Do you think that the world you see is the world as it is? If so, then think again. The world that you see is merely your model of the world. This is why some people see a beautiful, divine, elegant, happy world, and others see a shit hole. The fact of the matter is, your brain has been programmed, by its environment.

Each set of programs consists of four basic parts:
Genetic Imperatives. Totally hard-wired programs or "instincts."
Imprints. These are more-or-less hard wired programs which the brain is genetically designed to accept only at certain points in its development. These points are known, in ethology, as times of imprint vulnerability.
Conditioning. These are programs built onto the imprints. They are looser and fairly easy to change with counter-conditioning.
Learning. This is even looser and "softer" than conditioning.
The point here is that relearning and counter-conditioning is entirely possible. Don't just think that you were born this way.

The causes of social anxiety
Software faults
Negative self image (Or low self esteem), caused by:
Negative belief systems, caused by:
People telling you that you're not good enough
People telling you that you're stupid
People telling you that you're ugly
People telling you that you're a little shit
Basically people shitting on you and spitting on you your entire life.
Remember that children believe fucking anything, ANYTHING! It's a genetic imperative for a child to believe anything their parents say. When I was a kid, my parents told me that a fat man with a white beard and red suit flew reindeer around every home on the planet in one night delivering presents to all the good kids, and guess what? I believed it. Probably you did too. All the negative things you were told as a kid, you believed. Your subconscious took that on board and formed a belief system around it, hence, you believe that you're not good enough.

Hardware faults
Low levels of dopamine being received (dopamine motivates us to do things which ensure our survival, and makes us feel good when we do) caused by:
Dopamine D2 receptor deficiency (Desensitization), caused by:
Constant bombardment of dopamine D2 receptors by dopamine, caused by:
Overuse of porn (probably the most stimulating), drugs, alcohol, video games, and junk food.

I bet you weren't as anxious/awkward until you started over indulging in your dopamine addictions were you, unless you already had a negative self image, which wasn't even yours to begin with until someone perhaps unwittingly put that in your brain.

You know all the people that say "Nofap is making girls notice me more"... they are fucking spot on. I've noticed it myself.

Only 7% of Human communication is done verbally (not including phones, texting, emails, smoke signals, etc). 38% is tone of voice, and 55% is BODY LANGUAGE. Nofap teaches you self control, which is a confidence boost in itself. It also allows time for your dopamine receptors to replenish. If nofap inspires you to better yourself in every way possible, like it has inspired me to stay off the drugs and booze and video games and junk food, then that's even more dopamine receptors that are gonna heal. Confidence really does show in your body language. It's in your posture, your walk, your facial expressions. Tell me people don't notice that.

Women are much better at communicating than men, get them in a group and they won't shut up! If women are much better at communicating than men, then its obvious that they can also read body language better too. By the way it's important to note that body language is normally read subconsciously

SO... to cut a long post short, YOU ARE NOT INHERENTLY AWKWARD OR ANXIOUS!
Fix your software! Find your negative core beliefs and change them. This is the difficult part.

Fix your hardware! Restore your dopamine receptors. This is the easier part.

You can and will live a life free from social anxiety, mark my words. As a long time sufferer of social anxiety myself, I can say that one of the best cures I have found for it is nofap.

Peace and love.

 

Houston, we have a contradiction

 

Amazing post! This really inspired me a lot thank you