IS SEX CONSIDERED AS RELAPSE?

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by IWantToBeAHuman, Jan 2, 2017.

  1. IWantToBeAHuman

    IWantToBeAHuman Fapstronaut

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    Hi fapstronauts ..
    Day 5 on no PMO
    Earlier I had sex with my girlfriend and I didn't enjoy it that much because of my premature ejaculation . I didn't like the feeling after sex because I feel so much exhausted . should I start from day 1 again and do a hard more 90 days ?
     
  2. Sex is not a relapse. Unless you have sex addiction, in which case it may be a relapse. Or if you are doing Monk Mode where rules involve no sex, in which case it might count as a relapse as well. But if porn is your challenge and you do Hard Mode or any of less harder modes then no, sex is not a relapse.

    You can still have sex during Hard Mode, it's just orgasm you're not allowed. So if that's you were doing then yes, it is a relapse. Not because you had sex but because you had intentional orgasm.

    You can still have sex on Hard Mode as long as you do not orgasm. Like that you can still have fun, satisfy your GF and maybe even build some emotional connection. Because you take away the finish line and so you can focus more on actual experience of sex, rather than just getting off. Women usually enjoy it tho, cos it makes them feel that making love is about them, rather than you just busting a nut. Plus you would not feel as exhausted afterwards. And on top of it it trains self discipline, which is always beneficial ally in this challenge against porn. So maybe try Karezza.
     
    Maskwa91 likes this.
  3. IggyIshness

    IggyIshness Fapstronaut

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    I think sex is completely fine but i would recommand doing after rebooting at least 90 days, it can still have negative effects on your reboot and slow it down.
     
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  4. IWantToBeAHuman

    IWantToBeAHuman Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your replies . I think I will reset my counter and see what happens after 90 days
     
  5. BlueEye

    BlueEye Fapstronaut

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    Even if it's an old topic, I want to answer since it the first link on google when you're looking for "is sex relapse".

    I think that there is no evidence nor science arguments/facts behind this even if I think that it can be justified, no one can actually confirm those suppositions. I think that it would be more appropriate to say that if you're going on a no PMO with no GF, wait until you're done to look for a girl to stay away from what cause you to make the NoFap. But don't encourage a man to stay away from his GF or at least encourage him to explain the situation cause no girl (people) will enjoy to be sexually rejected for 3 months after having sexual activities.

    If NoFap is just a challenge, then okay, why not but if OP has PE, the best answers will come from a sex specialised doctor. We definitely should give up that "from internet answer" culture to really help people. We should show them which door to push instead of giving them emotional based answers.

    @The Serpent of Fire Concerning the question : Is sex a relapse ? you said :
    Well, I think that it depends. I personnaly don't considere sex as a relapse cause I do NoFap cause of PIED but if I have a gf or a one night stand that I can pound to make me ejaculate, which is what I'm looking for, having sex and orgasm with a girl instead of my hand. Then, for me, I don't think it is a relapse and won't change my counter to zero.

    If I got caught masturbating to porn because of the chaser effect acting like it's okay because I just had sex, then, for me, it will be a relapse. Since I have a porn addiction, I considere solo fap and PMO as relapse because that's what caused me PIED wich ruined my sexual life that I desperately want to retrieve and everytime I have a boner with a girl that lead to have sex with her, if I enjoy the moment and ejaculate, this is a victory and it should have no negative effect on my mind and attitude. "Oh I did ejaculate.. I've failed" no, just no.

    I think (tought ?) NoFap is all about enjoying and improve your life. Create connection. Sharing time instead of just beat the meat alone. Fixing your problem which are different for everyone. That's why I'm answering this thread cause I can't let you both promote such extremist thoughts.

    I think that the answer is : it does all depends of what you're looking for. Are you looking for an hard challenge ? Then okay, do not have sex at all. Are you looking to quit porn ? Then, don't watch porn. I think that every problem has it's solution which is not necessarily doing an old fashioned NoFap.

    Especially for PE that requiere medical attention.
     
    Last edited: Jun 20, 2018
  6. Mister Fire

    Mister Fire Fapstronaut

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    Recover first THEN have sex.Having sex with a fucking PMO addiction will only ruin the experience (as you noticed it Mister Premature-Ejaculation).You didn't relapse since you didn't PMO, but you should wait at least 30 days (or more depending on your specific case) before having sex again.
     
    Last edited: Jun 20, 2018
  7. BlueEye

    BlueEye Fapstronaut

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    I had and still have sex sometimes with a PMO addiction and I still enjoy it as much as I did when I had no PMO addiction, am I broken ?
     
  8. Mister Fire

    Mister Fire Fapstronaut

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    Who knows.But what I know for sure, and that's a really common PMO symptom, is that when I was a fucking PMO addict I was stuck in my head (with my dirty fantasies) while having sex 'cause real sex wasn't exciting enough.In the other hand, when I had sex during my 8 months NoFap streak, real sex became awesome again.
     
  9. eadgbe

    eadgbe Fapstronaut

    Having sex is literally the reason I'm on nofap so, no, it's a success in my books.
     
  10. BlueEye

    BlueEye Fapstronaut

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    That's what I said in my previous answer. Every one is different, so answer should be different for everyone.

    See, I'm not the only one.

    The answer is just what you want it to be as a relapse and if you're honest with yourself, you will know what is good for you. I do think that sex is not a relapse but if you do think it is because you don't enjoy sex nuff while being on PMO, it is also a valid reason to considere it as a relapse.

    I mean, not talking to you but everyone on this forum, NoFap is about improving and enjoying life, it is not a competition with strict rules.
     
  11. ClimberF

    ClimberF Fapstronaut

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  12. muted

    muted Fapstronaut
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    When I broke up with my girlfriend, after two months without pmo we had petting.
    When she left I felt like shit.
    I don’t know why. I immediately felt bad after what we did. After that I had to get back to myself as if I was just masturbating for porn. Maybe it's a big tide of dopamine, maybe it was somehow connected with addiction?
    When we were together, I remember that after sex I sometimes felt weak too but I do not remember how bad I felt. It’s hard for me to say now. I just hope that when I recover, sex will not make me return to addiction.
     

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