Marriage

I have always been very opposed to marriage due to seeing my parents terrible marriage. Im still very weary of it, and I am open to the idea of it but not until most likely after age 40 or so, no younger. Your thoughts?

 

I'm in the same boat. My parents marriage can be really fucking vile at times and it has totally fucked me up. It's part of the reason why I'm so submissive.

I'm not sure if I want to get married, bit I do know I've got to reboot properly first, so I don't become the Stepford Wife my broken brain keeps telling me to be.

 

I feel very similarly

 

In what way. Would you mind telling me. I thought I was pretty much alone. I got so bad I was trawling through biblical housewife blogs and reading books from the 50s which told women how to obey. Even my friends noticed and began teasing me.

 

A healthy marriage based on mutual respect, yes. Not one based on blind obedience and abuse - which is what is was actively seeking pre-reboot.

 

In what ways

 

Something very difficult to find, and very dangerous to attempt, which is why I won’t consider it until I am middle aged.

 

Yes, my parents marriage has dissolved and was pretty horrible while it lasted. I’m really uninterested in the typical marriage process. Getting married in my 20s or when I’m 30 and still trying to make money for myself and get a career, then end up stuck middle class with a few kids.

I won’t marry until I’m about middle age,I can consider myself fairly wealthy, and I will not have more than one child.

 

I have been married for 20 years. It has been wonderful and it has been horrible.
If you marry in middle age and have kids, you will still be taking care of your kids when you are old. It may be better to do it when you are young and still have energy.
In reality, you can't really plan this stuff. When you are ready and you meet the rigjt person, it will happen spontaneously.

 

That's what I've figured out. It will happen if and when it happens. Being desperate for it caused me to lower my standards to dangerous levels. I'm getting used to the idea that it might never happen for me, and that's more preferable to an abusive marriage.

 

That's a great plan, except you're forgetting the fact that most of the good ones will be taken by the time you're middle aged. You're right at the age where people start looking to settle and when you start to see all your friends taking the plunge, you'll probably start to feel the pressure. most guys are probably not ready to get married when they do. Maybe that's why so many end up divorced. Damned if you do, damned if you don't I guess, but then again, many people end up in lasting wonderful marriages so what do I know.