Erotic stories

I think they should be avoided as they still burn 'visual' images or imaginations in the mind that are not in-line with reality. Therefore they will distort a healthy view of 'real' sex and leave you always unfulfilled (or in serious cases incapable) with a 'real' partner. In some ways I find them worse than the visual stuff as there is pretty much no limit on what the imagination can think up and write down, so its ultimate fantasy land. Whereas there are certain limits on what real people can do on a camera even when acting, and even the poor acting makes it seem fake anyway.

I'm okay with keeping away from visual stuff but find my biggest battles are against stories. I relapsed a few day ago and still have those thoughts in my mind almost ever hour. Man its tough. I find they still leave you feeling just as cheap as fapping to the visual so I think should be avoided.

It will be interesting to hear what others have to say.

30 days isn't far away mate, nice work!

 

First, I think you should edit out the title of the "filthy fiction" you used to masturbate to. I would encourage anyone that successfully reboots from porn to avoid it like the plague thereafter. Is erotic writing really pornography? Yes, most definitely!

 

I can see your perspective & I agree to a certain level. Role play in a relationship for example, is fantasy & could perhaps be considered healthy in a real relationship. Every time you masturbate, there is most probably fantasy and depending on where you sit with that, its arguably right or wrong, most people on this site would agree that compulsive masturbation is bad. However, where does one draw the line?

In my history (when I was getting action) I couldn't get aroused by my G/F alone (who was rather fortunate looking) without referring to the stories I was reading at the time. My mind was over-saturated with fantasy that the real thing wasn't doing it for me.... Alternatively, I'd rather that my G/F turned me on instead of some book or story.

Long term I believe the damage is that:
- My G/F wouldn't feel attractive and feel like second best to a fantasy story. Which would in turn dampen her desire for sex and ultimately make our sex life worse putting a strain on our relationship.
- My mind would've become so over-saturated with stories and limit-less fantasy and would need MORE and MORE and darker and darker stories to keep it interested (which I experienced and many P users say the same).

For me, & this may sound lofty but I draw lines by making a distinction between lust and love. Lust being never satisfied and self centered. Love being satisfying and focused on the other person. (Its nice to not be overly concerned with the self). For me stories are just feeding my lust and therefore I try to avoid.

 

I think erotica leads downhill. I've read plenty, and written plenty, and unpublished my work once I started seeing what it led me and others to. It has always led me into written porn, and then into full blown porn. That's the way the mind works, right? Words are intended to portray a narrative, but you see the narrative as images/movies in your head, and then you search for similar images/movies. It's a slippery slope that we'd do best to avoid. If you found the need to become a fapstronaut, the odds are your relationship to sexuality is at least slightly warped. This means the chances are that erotic stories will lead you up the garden path. So avoid them like ebola.

 

Any kind of erotica is made for arousing, and makes you fantasize. Every time you fantasize you are triggering the same brain paths as using porn, so the more away one stays from it, its better for rebooting.

http://yourbrainonporn.com/sexual-fantasy-the-more-you-scratch-the-more-you-itch