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This is killing my relationship with society.

Discussion in 'Loneliness' started by Riester, Jul 16, 2018.

  1. Riester

    Riester New Fapstronaut

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    I'm spending too much time at home because my addiction and it only gets harder to get out. I think PMO is the reason. I'm stuck here exposing myself to the misaligned hyper-sexualised values of the porn world and I know it, it makes me sick and I can't stop.

    In an effort to stop it from interfering with my life I hyper-react and idealise my relationship to the outside world, friends, society, strangers, loved ones, extended family and ultimately the entire universe. I've replaced my values with ideological pictures of the way things should be and when I go out and talk to people I can't think properly. I'm unable to interact and engage on account of my fear of some underlying and distorted value showing through. I try to interact with a false image of what I think people in order to protect myself are and it just doesn't compute with the real world. No matter how much I expose myself to the outside world I can't engage with it and it's so lonely like this. So I come back home, PMO, and anxiously try to restructure this overt organisation of humanity so I can feel accepted as a 'human' with 'human values'.

    Hopefully, I won't do this anymore. Hopefully, I can stop this exposure and just go out and speak honestly of what I think and feel without fearing that I'm going to spurt out something more aligned to what I've exposed myself to rather than who I really am.
     
  2. Well if this addiction is killing you, why don't you kill it first?
    Don't let it be stronger than you!
     
  3. moonesque

    moonesque Fapstronaut
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    Start here, go to your values and learn, what are your values and why, how are they a part of who you really are.

    The process of starting a change to all of what you described will
    be hard but it will eliminate what you are experiencing. It is PMO and it is not, PMO is a symptom and now you have to be responsible over it and yourself. Values are the place to start at.
     
    Riester likes this.
  4. I think you need to talk this out with someone because it pressures you so much. If you don't have any friends who you think are close enough(no shame in that, not sure if I would) you could always contact a psychologist. I feel like you would really relieve yourself of a huge burden on yourself if you could share it with someone else
     
  5. Hmm, I was in kind of a similar situation. Pretending how things are, but knowing back in my mind that it's different.

    What helped me, was writing things down for/to/with myself. Getting more insight in myself and my though pattern. One goal was to get mofe consistent, more congruent.
    One very big influence to my life, comparable to NoFap, was to go Vegan. Not only have i noticed hige benefits to my health and energy levels, but also make me philosophical/psychologocal consistent, because i always considered myself an animal friend. Imo opinion ppl are addicted to animal products, same way people are addicted to pmo.

    So, getting in line with your own heart, your own feelings, in a way that you can be truly proud of yourself.. by doing what is in aligment with your morals, with your highest path, will help I think.
    All the best man
     
  6. Riester

    Riester New Fapstronaut

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    I agree, writing really helps me when I’m at my worst. Thanks.
     
  7. You're welcome friend. I had a lot of inspiration from Infite Waters on Youtube. Also Gabriel Kalei Bocanegra is very inspirational to me.
    Please be kind to yourself, like you treat yourself like a best friend.
    I've come to notice, the mind can get into some kind of doomset mindset. When depressed, feeling it will always be like that etc.
    But things can change. My situation of not grear yet (no GF, almost no friends), but its way better than a year before, and I feel blessed about having get to know about Nofap.
    Take it easy, take top notch care of yourself, take enough rest. Do what is right, but dont expect to solve problems over night. Take every small step you can, and dont feel defeated by mistakes, but learn from every single one of them.
    This forum is a huge inspirarion to me, we all want to help each other. All the best man
     

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