Can’t flirt

I've never been good at flirting , and at the same time I've never had to be. I've never been one to go to parties or clubs or bars since I think it's weird (for me) to look to hook up with strangers. Although I don't flirt, I will say that I'm a relaxed person and I'm funny, so making conversation isn't really a problem most of the time.

My girl right now is my best friend and even before we were together I never really flirted with her, she said she was just impressed with the things I'd talk about and that's what got her interested in me.

The closest thing I've done to flirting was when I was a junior in highschool and I told my crush "you look nice today", since she was wearing a dress for dress up day during spirit week.

 

I used to have this problem don't any more. Fuck it yolo. Talk to anyone about anything and don't worry about what happens. Don't over think. Fear causes hesitation and hesitation causes your worst fears to come true. Be confident and if your not just pretend to be. Lasses are people too just be friendly and don't worry about the outcome cuz your great no matter what happens

 

If you don't know what to say, then create tension in other ways.

The tonality of your voice, your eye contact, your body language, how close you are to her, touching her, what you're feeling can express itself through your behavior (do you have a vibe of wanting her / enjoying your interaction with her / interested / curious / playful), etc.

As for what to say... being honest can also create tension without needing any clever lines to say. Tell her some positive things that you can observe about her. What do you like about her (physically or whatever else you know about her) so far? How do you feel around her so far? What do you think about the interaction between you two so far?

If you want to say something in a sexual manner, then first you have to feel aroused by her. Let yourself feel aroused by her. From there, it's about testing for interest via being clear and bold about what you say. The more clear and bold you are, the more clear and bold she will be about accepting or rejection you.

The important thing is having fun with this. If you're having fun and she's having fun, then you both will spiral upwards. What's more fun than talking? Touching.... holding... kissing... sex..... dating..... etc. You have to be willing to take risks to see progress. Be daring enough to see how far you can go until she says no or not yet.

You have to be willing to be rejected. That's why being clear and bold about your behavior and the things you say is important. You want to attract people that want the same thing you do and resonate with your honest self expression. Rather than hiding your intentions, hiding who you are, and trying to convince someone to like someone that you aren't or manipulate your way into a specific outcome. She's either interested or she's not. Don't waste time trying to avoid rejection. It's a lot better if you both want what you both honestly want.

So if all else fails and you draw a blank on what to say, then get closer to her and be honest about what's going on in the moment.

From what little I know about you and what happened that night with the girl... you could've been honest with her about what you felt.

"I really wish I didn't feel so clueless and awkward about what to say to you because I think you're gorgeous."

"I just realized that I have no idea how to flirt, but if you give me your number and have dinner with me sometime, I promise I'll get better at it."

Just something relevant to how you were feeling / what you want / what you think of her / what you thought of the interaction between you two / etc.

Another important thing, she probably doesn't know what the fuck to do or say either. If she likes you so far, then you can do or say stupid things and she'll help you out and make it easier for you. That's why being vulnerable and expressing yourself honestly is so good. It's a sign of having self esteem and having a strong character. If you were to close yourself off because you wanted to protect yourself from getting hurt and you were feeling self conscious, then she would feel that negative vibe and want nothing to do with you.