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Dear NoFap, let's discuss the extremism here.

Discussion in 'Off-topic Discussion' started by Palmtop Tiger, Sep 26, 2014.

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  1. Palmtop Tiger

    Palmtop Tiger Fapstronaut

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    While going around nofap, I have noticed there is a certain trend towards certain types of extremism that I find disturbing. Thus, I'd like to bring forth a few things.

    No 1: Please don't force your own standards of your journey upon others. If you wish not to have wet dreams for example, or never ejaculate, that's your business. Everyone's journey is different and it is counter productive to try to force your own standards upon others.

    No 2: Everyone is at different stages of the problem. Some have ED. Others are completely addicted. Others just want to have more self control. We shouldn't assume that everyone is the same.

    No 3: It's fantastic that there is a community dedicated to breaking this cycle of PMO. However, PMO is not the ultimate evil on earth. When people think of us, let them not think of us, "those were those guys who didn't fap" but instead "those were those guys who made a difference."

    I don't intend to start a flame war here, but I have noticed certain trends here that I believe are more destructive than helpful to the community.
     
  2. ADC

    ADC Fapstronaut

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    I agree with you. There's no 100% working way since everybody is different, but I guess sometimes I'm tempted to claim that what I do is what everybody should do, since it's working with me :p
     
  3. Dad

    Dad Fapstronaut

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    I thought that we were all here to have a discussion. Not to pressure or feel pressured. I like to exercise my greatest efforts of tolerance, respect, and writing craftsmanship when I come here. I come to learn, not instruct, and sometimes I feel compelled to share a point of view.
    My biggest pet peeve, after getting over the initial shock of bad behavior here, is people polluting threads with off topic comments. I end up spending more time than I planned, on site, because I have to wade through a bunch of crap to follow a thread. I guess its the same in all online forums that aren't heavily moderated.
     
  4. IGY

    IGY Guest

    It is worth bearing in mind that the tiny triangle at the bottom of each post links you to a report box and you can report stuff. A few months ago we had persistent spammers and the mods got all over it and we have been completely clear for ages. Let's work with Abel and his colleagues to remind people of the rules and in if absolutely necessary impose sanctions.
     
  5. Dad

    Dad Fapstronaut

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    Thanks IGY and Abel
    I didn't mean to sound like you guys weren't doing your thing. I realize that I play a role to help out now.
     
  6. IWantABetterLife22

    IWantABetterLife22 NoFap Moderator

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    I would recommend reporting posts (like IGY is saying) and using the private message system for personal disputes. Let's all work together to turn NoFap back into the supportive, welcoming forum it once was.
     
  7. itscometoth1seh

    itscometoth1seh Fapstronaut

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    I think that one of the issues here may be that alot of the site is geared towards encouragement and inspiring each other. This is an area where it becomes easy to stray into the realms of imposing one's own interpretation of the doctrine of nofap onto others.
     
  8. EoT23

    EoT23 Fapstronaut

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    I dont know about 'forcing' my standards on people, but I am going to say what I think, especially if people ask for an opinion. The other side of the coin I believe is that people get very easily offended over the internet.
     
  9. Palmtop Tiger

    Palmtop Tiger Fapstronaut

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    There's nothing wrong with speaking one's mind. My main concern is that certain brands of extremism such as "You must preserve sperm at all costs." or "You must never have a wet dream again" paint a rather negative image of nofap and may discourage others from joining.
     
  10. vlaw

    vlaw Banned

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    People shouldn't force their opinion on others. Like calling me a monster/women abuser/degrading western women and some other crap... because they disgree with me about a/my certain lifestyle. Yet they are the same ones to report you to the mods if you reply back to them. You all know who you are!
     
  11. vlaw

    vlaw Banned

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    "There's nothing wrong with speaking one's mind"

    I did that yesterday and immediately got a warning from one of the mod. Go figure!
     
  12. Well bro you do the same. Calling it a "style" is a bit too easy. You spit on "white knights" and "feminist western women" every single post. I'm not talking at all about prostitution or whatever. But as a western woman, I'm really, freaking, tired of being put back at my place every time you post. There's as much arguments I could use to prove you that I believe in feminism, and that it is required and needed, than you to prove that you believe that prostitution is good. Except I respect you and your opinions, and am not trying to force anything on you. I'm not on war with you. Don't mistake expressing a disagreement and a crusade against one valour. We are not attacking you vlaw, stop having a persecution complex. I personally am tired of these direct, gratuitous and unjustified diatribe about what I essentially am - a western woman. If at least you were explaining yourself. Saying the reasons why you got so hurt by a person that happened to be a western woman. But the way you generalize is offending. There are eastern women that are worst than western women. We are not evil for fuck's sake. Keep paying your cute asian prostitutes, I don't mind as long as nobody's freedom is endangered. But stop pissing on me because of what I intrinsically am. Thank you, and have a nice day.
     
  13. Clumsy

    Clumsy Banned

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    1) I have not seen anybody who tries to force anybody to avoid wet dreams. What I have seen, is a number of people trying to help people who asks for help to prevent wet dreams.

    2) Agree

    3) PMO is a very destructive thing that cause suicide, divorce, family problems, physical as well as psychological problems. How can you call that not being an "evil"? I don't get it. PMO is as evil as alcohol and any other drug.
     
  14. Clumsy

    Clumsy Banned

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    Don't mind him. I have explained how the mind gets affected by PMO. He has a subconscious/conscious hatred and anger towards western women because he see's them as a threat. Everywhere he goes he sees those western men with western women but he cannot approach them, and the women does not want to approach him. It's nothing wrong with vlaw, and I'm sure that he would develop healthy relationships after maybe a few years free from PMO. But that's why he keeps calling asian women so good and so lovely, because "they know their place".

    He's just a sad individual who can't approach individualistic, western women. I'm not a feminist myself, but I find his obvious anger and frustration kind of classless.

    He does not like women, so why should they like him? He's the typical PMO-addicted man.
     
    Faygal likes this.
  15. Clumsy

    Clumsy Banned

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    Haha yeah this site is not really democratic. I've received numerous warnings and got banned once and now I received some "limited access" thing lol.
     
  16. Clumsy

    Clumsy Banned

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    I have not seen anybody who claimed that.
     
  17. nonanino

    nonanino Fapstronaut

    Hurray for this thread!

    This is indeed the internet. I wonder how it goes at real-life AA meetings. Or what would happen if a bunch of NoFappers got together in a cozy comfortable environment with some light snacks available.
     
  18. IWantABetterLife22

    IWantABetterLife22 NoFap Moderator

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    I think one thing we all need to realize that whenever you comment a thread, that comment is your opinion, nothing more and nothing less. It's up to the OP of the thread to take your advice or not, and if he/she does not, then there's nothing you can do about it. Also, all the comments should be helping the OP and giving him/her advice, not targeting other commenters for their opinion, saying that they're wrong, or anything like that. That's how we get off-topic so quickly. So comments like "He's just a sad individual who can't approach individualistic, western women" are uncalled for. Furthermore, if someone disagrees with your comment, just agree to disagree and don't try to convince them otherwise unless they're the OP.

    But beyond that, thank you Palmtop Tiger for starting this thread.
     
  19. vlaw

    vlaw Banned

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    Well why don't you do what LOGICAL thinking people do and just ignore/skip what you don't like!...but no you lefties what everything you don't agree with banned/illegal :mad: That's create NANNY STATE...like that liberal controlled shit-hole called California! You wouldn't pay me to live there.

    Bye!
     
  20. Duh? I'm trying very, very, very hard to see where I stated my political views? Just so you know even though you don't care I'm with the French right party. Your assumptions are hilarious and sad at the same time. I'd love to live in California. I'm relieved to know you won't be there.

    Besides this answer has nothing to do with what I stated.

    I won't ignore what I don't like. I don't think equality's the answer - I think justice's the answer.
     
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