Marriage Does Not Exist to Make You Happy - Jason Evert

If you're anti-religious, think "your improvement" when you hear "your sanctification"

 

That's why I said "if you are anti-religious". "Holy" can be understood as being made "perfect" or "pure". Since we all sin and are imperfect, and nothing imperfect enters heaven, we have to be made perfect, or improve, and marriage is an excellent arena for that.

 

Whether your anti-religious or religious sanctification, holiness, and etc all mean the same thing which is a growth and transformation in LOVE. It's all about love because God is said to be Love itself. This why in Christian theology faith and hope will be no more in heaven, but charity aka love will abide forever (because God who is love itself is eternal).

Sanctification is all about seeing the opportunities to grow in love and knowing that some of the most difficult and stressful moments in life are the greatest opportunities for this growth. This is the type of mindset which built vows like for richer or for poorer, sickness and in health, and until death do us part. Saints are called as such because they had a selfless love for God where they loved Him even if there was no reward to do so. This type of love is formed in marriage by loving a spouse even when you get no reward out of it. It's a level of love that transends self interest and which mimics the love God has for His creation since He gains nothing by loving us, but rather loves us for our own benefit.

So if you don't think growing in selfless love is improvement, well then I don't know what to say tell you. You might need rethink your position just a bit.

 

Well stated. I sometimes worry that people who aren't versed in religion hear words like "sanctification" and immediately discard the message. That's why I tried to expand or simplify the word a little.

 

I'll also add that marriage does not solve your problems, but magnifies them, even making them appear worse or larger than they are, so that they can be solved.

 

Yep, which can be said of any vocation. The belief is that certain people are called to certain vocations because they will be the perfect environment to bring about the death to self that is necessary in order for the divine will (love) to live through you.