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Is it love that we really crave through addiction?

Discussion in 'Porn Addiction' started by Spartan17, Sep 20, 2017.

  1. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    I'm not proselytizing or something but ever since I've been a more sincere Christian, been praying, meditating and especially volunteering in community service, I have found it very easy to overcome this addiction mentally or psychologically.
    I feel a deep sense of peace and love.
    Whether it is spiritual love or just plain old love... Are most of us dudes here really trying to feel loved by pornography?
    It sure is in my case.. coz besides my spiritual religious growth, I cannot really think of anything else besides porn that grants such a deep level of self acceptance and self love.
    Is love really the answer?
     
    Reborn16 likes this.
  2. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    For the record, I don't mean the romantic kind of love really.. but if you think that's the answer or might help or be connected to this topic strongly, no problem.
     
  3. Got to Overcome

    Got to Overcome Fapstronaut

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    It's a lot of things. For me, it was an inability to deal with negative emotions, particularly rejection. For others, it might be a sense of inadequacy, or an inability to deal with work or school-related stress.

    And yes, acceptance and love are huge factors. As mentioned, I would turn to porn when I felt rejected and was thus in particularly strong need of approval, or acceptance. And unfortunately, porn is always there, and it will never turn us down, or criticize us, or tell us we'll never measure up.

    So in a way similar to you, I've found that my ability to abstain from porn is in direct correlation to my emotional health. The more loved, accepted and happy I feel, the easier it is for me to forget that porn even exists.

    Anyhow, I'm glad that you've been able to develop this sense of love and acceptance through your faith.
     
    Spartan17 likes this.
  4. Reborn16

    Reborn16 Fapstronaut

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    I've found on longer streaks that if I take time to connect it really helps. Connecting with people, the nature around us etc. So I guess a love or appreciation for real things is what I have noticed.

    Also if I start caring more about my surroundings and people in my life (friends, family and strangers), then I can feel better about myself and not want to escape to the internet.
     
    Spartan17 likes this.
  5. Longinus

    Longinus Guest

    I think within every human spirit there is a longing for the Infinite; which is God, but that we can pervert that longing by turning to what's finite. Do I, therefore, believe that all addiction is misplaced love? Yes, absolutely, but not the type of love the Greeks called Eros. No, I believe all addiction is a result of misplaced love referred to by the Greeks as agape; which is a love that looks to sacrifice itself for it's beloved; a love which the same love God has for us. It is a love which offers the entire person for the good of the beloved; it is a love which is selfless and seeks no reward but the happiness of the one loved.

    All of us when we give into our addiction give nothing less than our entire self, but because this love is still pointed inward, it does not find that Infinite Source which can fill it. Rather it is met with a finite object which cannot satisfy the infinite and so we therefore are left with a deep emptiness and void in our hearts. And while some will say we do not have a soul, this doesn't explain then our infinite capacity for peace and happiness. It doesn't explain why the finite cannot fill the void in our hearts.
     
  6. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    I think you are spot on.
    I am not so keen on Christian orthodoxy but I like expressing my spiritual side in Christian way without all the organized religion bullshit.
    But what you say is true.
    I want to feel loved. Love is the answer.
    Infinite love.
    How to get it?
    Sit quiet and realize Christ has always loved you, will always love you. Lose yourself in the love and silence and grace of Christ. So simple
     
  7. I will win

    I will win Fapstronaut

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  8. Spartan17

    Spartan17 Fapstronaut

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    Love. The feeling of complete acceptance and feeling of sweetness. Feeling innocent like a child. No selfishness.
     
  9. Exit To Freedom

    Exit To Freedom Fapstronaut

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    You won't get that from Porn, and it's true if may be filling a void, but not a love void. If so, it's not real love so the question is not really applicable. At best it's a substitute for having the willingness to let go of it, for the sake of the chance for real love without all the perversion and distorted reality. And isn't love real?
     

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