I am Confused

My personal opinion is that masturbating is not necessarily bad. It could even have some healthy benefits. Especially in moderation if you have no other sexual outlets.

That said, the way we, or at least myself was masturbating was VERY bad and immoral. Furthermore it was affecting my REAL romantic relationships with REAL women.

If I have to think of some nasty porn while I am having sex with someone I am attracted to and love, that is a problem inside my mind. I have romantic love and my own self-esteem backwards.

If you want to know more philosophically from a non religious standpoint why it is bad and sex should be a much higher value then we are treating it, read this. I believe it is true.

It has taken me years to fully grasp this Objective and non-religious concept. If you want to know more let me know...

 

Ask yourself why you want to masturbate?
Ask yourself why you have the need to think about sexual stuff.

I don't have the need to do that neither want to do that. I simply live my life doing productive things, mastrubation isn't productive for me. It's just time wasting. Also, I don't want to objectify women for self-pleasure. That's just for weak men.

 

Truth. And to add it is for men with low self esteem.

 

Okay...Let's see.

Masturbation:
-Drains your energy and gives you nothing beneficial in return.
-Makes you feel like a loser because you can't control your actions.
-Waste your time.
-Is one of the reasons you are watching porn; it's hard to masturbate without watching porn.

Porn:
-Is a fuel for masturbation.
-Makes you pervert in real life.
-Wastes your time.
-Gives you nothing in return
-Makes you treat women like a sexual object.

Do you really think that spending your life every day on watching naked women, and hentai, and masturbating like a horny, pervert person is normal?

 

Masturbation in moderation isnt inherently bad, but it isnt bad in the same way eating a Big Mac isnt inherently bad; ie it can be too easily abused to be worth the risk, especially for people with addictive personalities. Every single day, even on days where the urges arent too strong, I still want to masturbate, I yearn for some sort of sexual release and I know that doing it once wouldnt be harmful in and of itself. HOWEVER, as someone with an addiction, I cant just do that, I cant just masturbate once and be done with it, I have to masturbate over and over until I physically cant anymore, and frankly I dont give a shit what some online psychologist says, I know that isnt healthy and whether its placebo effect or not cold turkey is the only thing that works for me. Sometimes you have to make your own decisions and come to your own conclusions, this is one of those times.

 

May I ask you what will be your idea of moderate masturbation.

 

And you will find yourself returning to porn. Believe masturbation is so hard to do without porn. Why don't eradicate both irretrievably, and start a new life.

 

And masturbation doesn't really give you any healthy benefits.

 

Well I am not as far as you have gone with Nofap. But within this sort period of time I am feeling more confident, motivated, my skin looks better, my eyes don't feel like I haven't had sleep for days. I feel energetic and I drive this energy into positive outlets such as working out & studying. I used to smoke but I don't have any cravings for them quite frankly because I have a even bigger urge to resist. And its not about the benefits for its about the challenge it poses to oneself. I know I am an addict as a smoker and as fapper because I don't have control over these things. It starts with one a day or a week( for smoking at a certain party) and then before you know its back. I am not saying masturbation is bad. It has according to some scientific forums healthy impacts sexually. But, I think you should just let the 90 days complete. And as for your GF, I think you should talk to her; maybe her perspective can help you get through this emotional turmoil.

 

Thats why i leaned all the tantra exercises to channel the energy up to my higher self and using it for positive things..
Also people that are against nofap are probibly fappers and so addicted cant live without it, or arent doing it at all and are not addicted so they have no idea of how much it hurts true sex addicts. Plus i bet the porn industry posts a lot of anti nofap stuff too as they spend millians and have lawers that stand behind free speach laws to make sure porn is available to everyone.