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Would you date yourself?

Discussion in 'Self Improvement' started by Issah, Apr 14, 2019.

  1. Issah

    Issah Fapstronaut

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    What have you been eating? I need some of that in my life.
     
  2. I've been eating some HC discipline. Waking up 5 am every day, to do everything that I have to do. Earning 10k/month the first time in life. Gratitude is :emoji_key:
     
    need4realchg and Issah like this.
  3. Honestly? Not really. I have ups-and-downs, but I still struggle to believe anyone could truly love me when there are so many better options out there. I know I'm a good, kind, caring guy; I know I'm moderately attractive, healthy, and successful; I know I'm fun and funny. But still, when my girlfriend tells me she loves me, I can't help but respond with, "Really?! Why?"

    My problem, I think, is that I compare myself to others too much. But I compare myself on such a surface level -- where they've been travelling, how good their hair looks, what car they've got -- that I never even bother to look beyond. Maybe that guy at the gym has huge muscles, but he could very easily be boring. Y'know? I really think we should only compare ourselves to our past selves, but it's extremely difficult to do.

    To answer your question, I find meditation and action helps. If you're feeling insecure, it's best to just go and do something. Can be a little thing or a big thing, just make sure you get something done and achieve something. It's better than wallowing. Sadly, it's the only advice I have.
     
    need4realchg, Issah and SirErnest like this.
  4. Infrasapiens

    Infrasapiens Fapstronaut

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    I see. Still no.
     
  5. Yeah, for sure! I was only kidding.
     
    Issah likes this.
  6. Me, using P and M, is pretty much the major cause of my situation. Recently, I got to a point of abstention where I was finally able to get my shit together. I didn't have to try to force myself to get things done. I had more energy and motivation than I knew what to do with and my depression was almost non-existent. The only down-side is that the urges were insanely high, hence the reason I relapsed. Hopefully, I know enough now to push through this stage and progress forward!
     
    Issah likes this.
  7. Fuck others, it's your life.

    Start loving yourself, set yourself as number 1 priority. When you are ready with yourself, and had fully accepted yourself as who you are.

    Then you're able to accept love and then you're able to give love genuinely.

    +You should compare yourself to your yesterday self, are you allowing yourself to have those low self esteem thoughts day after day after day?

    It is you and only you who can change all those things, BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!

    All the best :)
     
  8. I completely agree with you, and I'm trying. Everything you said is true, and deep down I know this. My girlfriend fell in love with me despite (by her own admission) dating dozens of men before me. Very few people forget who I am after they've met me, and I always become the "standout" character in social situations. People listen to me; I have power and influence.

    But I still doubt myself constantly and compare myself unfavourably to others. I'd guess I'm not the only one doing that on this forum.

    I am a better person today than I was on 1st January, though -- and as you say, that's the most important part. If I keep working and trying, then I'll get where I need to be.
     
    Issah likes this.
  9. I totally understand! I've overcame similar things in my journey.

    I see that you are highly self aware and sensitive which is good thing because that is going to be your true power,

    when

    you're ready to stop comparing yourself to others, then you'll understand what you are TRULY capable of :)

    It all starts within. Start with being aware of your self talk, think about how you talk to yourself in your thoughts, is the tone kind, positive, negative?

    You see outer world is reflection of your inner dialogue.

    But also environment is big deal. Are you hangin around with "losers" who complain and have low self esteem?
    Who drag you with them?

    + If you want serious change start listening affirmations such as "confidence affirmations" etc. Those are real stuff. Subconscious mind is 1000× more capable than conscious.



    If you want to know more or ask anything don't hesitate to send message :)

    All the best!
     
  10. I would date me, Im tall, have a big penis and Im on one hand crazy and on the other handquite reliable
     
    Trevelyan357 and need4realchg like this.
  11. PMOare4SoyBoys

    PMOare4SoyBoys Fapstronaut

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    Well hypothetically if I could find someone with very similar traits and value as I do then I would definitely date that person.

    I'm not perfect and I do have things to work on but overall I do think that I live with integrity which is essentially what I'd want to see in my partner.
     
    Issah likes this.
  12. I wouldn't date myself. I already don't trust myself as it is now. I'd probably be afraid I'd hurt myself.
     
  13. GigglingTrout

    GigglingTrout Fapstronaut

    No. At most, I would probably friendzone myself.

    I would go to the movies with myself, but only if my other friend can come too.
     
  14. GigglingTrout

    GigglingTrout Fapstronaut

    I would swipe right on Tinder, chat for a little bit and not say much (expecting me to carry the conversation), and then after a week or so, totally ghost myself.
     
    need4realchg likes this.
  15. GigglingTrout

    GigglingTrout Fapstronaut

    I would say "yes" to meeting for coffee, but whenever we try to plan for a day, I would tell myself that I'm too busy and that we'll have to raincheck

    Or pretend to be sick on the day we're supposed to meet
     
  16. Issah

    Issah Fapstronaut

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    :) need some hardcore internal discipline in my life too, you should be so proud of yourself. You're working hard and its paying off.
     
  17. Issah

    Issah Fapstronaut

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    I know right, why are we like this thou. So frustrating.

    Beautiful advice man, maybe eventually the more we force our minds to think the way we want them too they'll come right and be on our sides. We just mustn't stop trying to.

    And consistancy haha.
     
  18. Issah

    Issah Fapstronaut

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    Maybe try saying thanks babe I love you too. It's cool knowing you have someone/people who dont see you how you see you. :)
     
  19. Issah

    Issah Fapstronaut

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    Hahaha okay. Sorry if I came across snappy, anyway all the best with your nofap journey.
     
  20. Issah

    Issah Fapstronaut

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    What do you think you could do to trust yourself more?

    We focusing on actions and improvement here :)

    Ps. My self trust is Hella low too. But I know it's because of my lack of reliability and poor follow through on the things that I really value. Which is fixable. I just need to promise only what I can do or am serious about doing and then follow through.

    What's causing your low self trust?
     
    need4realchg likes this.

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