[30-CHALLENGE] THE THIRTY DAYS CHALLENGE !

Day 2/21

 

Hi everyone. I recently finished the 21 day challenge. I relapsed after that
But I think I am ready for this new challenge.
So count me in. Day 1.
I should: Keep myself busy. Keep my mind positive and calm. Exercise......

 

Day 3/30 done!

 

20/30 day tired after a sleepless night but I remain focused

 

30 days completed. I have been focusing on my two businesses and moving with purpose in all my acitivites. Downtimes are my biggest challange. Have a bigger goal than finding yourself and peace of mind, becuase within that goal you will realize that PM (not necesarily O) is a HUGE time waster.

 

Congratulations man, keep going !

 

finally making progress and recording good success.

 

11/30

 

Day 1/30

I hope this is the last time I'm writing this.

 

12

 

Day 2/30......

 

Day 3/30

 

5/30

 

starting first day

 

Day 2

 

Day 0. Restarted today.

 

Make sure that your heart is in the right place. You need to come to a point of realizing that porn isn't "Cotton candy" that you're just trying not to eat, you need to have a vision and a focus of something better. Something so much better that porn just isn't attractive anymore. You don't be successful at being healthy and dieting by telling yourself that candy doesn't taste good, or that the cheesecake isn't delicious. People that are successful at dieting do it because they TRULY believe that being fit and healthy is BETTER, and because they have a REASON to do so. For me it was love. I had a huge crush on a girl and I was fat and I realized that I would never get someone like her if I stayed the way I was. I still recognize that candy is delicious, but you CAN'T have that and be fit and healthy at the same time.

IT'S THE SAME THING WITH PORN. Porn IS NOT sex. It's not about sex. There's nothing natural about it, and you DON'T need it. YOu're not addicted to it per se, just the dopamine. That's why you still masturbate when you don't have porn.

Here's what you need. You need to change your focus off of sex. Focus on love. Focus on intimacy. On the relationship. On the person. When what you are truly striving for is love and openness and connection, your priorities shift. Realize that you CANNOT have that and porn at the same time. Just like you can't be fit and be eating chocolate, you cannot have porn and love at the same time. It doesn't work. Focus every morning. write it down. Change your values. Make a decision that you are going to fight for love. Remind yourself every time you sit down to have a meal. Before bed. Focus on what the most loving moment you've felt, felt like. And then realize that all porn is, is just wrapping paper. There's nothing there to fulfill that love. It's dogshit that'll make you feel bad. It's a giant 10 pound chocolate Resee's bar that DOES TASTE GOOD, but it makes you feel like SHIT after you eat it. Period. And it sets you back so far in your recovery to "get fit". Make the love you're striving for tangible. Make it a reality. Keep the filters. Keep the accountability. But completely shift your focus.

Love you guys.

It's been 4 years since I was fat. Since I cut out the candy and sugar. Since I started working out. I used to never think I could be attractive, and I believed it. I had a reason to change, the reason was love. It was something bigger than myself. Right now, I'm fully confident in my body. I lost 50 pounds. I have a clearly defined 6 pack, I work out calisthenics because I ENJOY IT, and because I realize I feel more myself when I'm working out and genuinely better when I push myself and when I live healthily. As someone who's been fat and fit. Being fit is worth it. Putting in the grind. Is worth it. 100%. Every SINGLE DAY I spent working out, running 3 miles after school. Every. Day. Literally never skipping until I was where I needed to be. Was work it. It hurt. It hurt a lot. I was hungry. That's part of it. You don't get results without dedication. But it was worth it.

It's been 6 months since I've seen porn. It's been nearly 3 since I've gotten off to ANYTHING sexual. I've relapsed 4 times so far with MO this year. Let. Me. Tell. You. Love. Is. Worth. Every. Freaking. Second. Of. Change. I've been lonely. I've been empty, I've craved. I've changed my priorities. I spend too much time on my recovery than I'd ever thought. I've opened up in ways that I thought would bring infinite shame. It's worth. Every. Thing. Porn is a trap that promises fulfillment and leaves you 100% empty. Right now when I'm feeling empty at my worst, I still feel more full and shame-free than I ever was at my best while watching porn. I promise you.

Porn feels good. Don't kid yourself. Otherwise you wouldn't be doing it. But when you accept that, and find something better. And Grind 100% every day working towards that. You find that you don't need it anymore. I still recognize that cupcakes taste great. I still have them occasionally when the timing warrants it, if I'm taking my brother out to ice cream, or a friend made me cookies. There's something to be said for moderation in everything. Except for porn. There's no point.

You can quit. You just need something to work towards.
From one brother to another. Even if you don't know it yet. Love is worth it.

Keep. It. Up.

 

Day 8
Check in

 

Wow, post of the year. Way to go man.

 

Day 24/31