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I’m doing good in nofap, but it feels like my life is a mess

Discussion in 'Rebooting - Porn Addiction Recovery' started by Sleepingbadger, Dec 8, 2018.

  1. Sleepingbadger

    Sleepingbadger Fapstronaut

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    Okay, I don’t know where to start. I’ve been addicted since 12 (now I’m 18) and I’m finally getting closer to quiting with 73 days streak.

    I’m doing good with nofap at the moment, and I have pretty much no urges at all, but my life feels so bad right now.

    Final exams of Upper secondary school are coming soon, in about 3-4 months, and I need to study for tests, write essays, do homework and study for the exams. I’ve not had any problem with studying hard before and I’ve always gotten good marks. However, lately I’ve been feeling exhausted with all the work, and I think I might be getting a burnout (my parents and friends always told me that I work too hard, sadly, I didn’t listen to them) and I’m also feeling depressed every day.

    And now, lately since I’ve been depressed, I’ve started drinking. I’m getting slowly addicted to alcohol at the same time when I’m quiting nofap. It isn’t too late to stop before developing a serious addiction, but I’m worried and always feeling bad after drinking, even though I’ve never been drunk.

    It just feels like there’s too much pressure, so little time and that my life is a complete mess.

    Doesn’t help at all that my family isn’t doing good financially and that I’m using our money for school books and studying just makes me feel worse, as well as adds pressure since I want to do good on the exams to not waste the precious money. However, looking at the requirements of universities I don’t think I can do good enough on the exams.

    Could it be that my long streak adds to my depression? A flatline maybe? My situation probably isn’t that bad but It just feels like it right now. I don’t know what to do.
     
  2. Hros

    Hros Fapstronaut

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    Sorry to hear you're having a hard time. Stress seems to the major cause of your depression. I've also had super-stressful times in my life. PMO, alcohol and other bad & addictive habits won't help at all, you'll only feel worse, because it's only a temporary fix.
    I don't think your streak is making you more depressed - rather, from my experience, you're becoming much more in-tune with your emotions than you've been in a very long time, since you've always been pushing them away until recently.
    What I find helpful with dealing with emotions is: a. talking to someone close - friend, mentor, sibling, etc. b. taking long walks without listening to anything and just letting all of the emotions sink in.
     
    Sleepingbadger likes this.
  3. Sleepingbadger

    Sleepingbadger Fapstronaut

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    Thank you for your answer! I never thought it that way that I could have been avoiding my emotions until now. I will try to take a walk through some fields and forests nearby to clear my head a little. I might also try to tell a friend, although It might be hard to open up to someone since I don't have anyone that close, so I'm afraid the situation could become very awkward.
     
  4. Hros

    Hros Fapstronaut

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    You could always try turning to a school counselor.
     
  5. Sleepingbadger

    Sleepingbadger Fapstronaut

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    You're right. I'll think about it.
     
  6. Hros

    Hros Fapstronaut

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    Good luck!
     
  7. Sleepingbadger

    Sleepingbadger Fapstronaut

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    Thank you!
     

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