90 days today.

Hello guys,

Just a little feedback about my first goal achieved.
I started on 23 october last year after two fap session in a row. It wasn't the first time but the first time i tried since i knew about nofap.

The tries i did before ended up by a relapse here is why:

-Loneliness (broke up with girlfriend and lost many friends because of this toxic relationship,
-i was jerking off just because i had no girlfriend and it was "removing" stress, mostly when i was bored when a slight urge was about to show up,
- Didn't know about the consequence of confidence, physical damages,
- Alcohol, when you're back from a night out, slightly drunk, alone,
- Videos with beauties making everything you dream of, it's really addictive, you look for a new girl every time, juste because you can't have much in real life.

And that day in october after reading this site and thinking about all of this it clicked. Here is why:

-Could remember a time when i had a girlfriend, there was a period for more than two weeks long that i couldn't even get a boner, seriously even when trying to jerk, trying everything, like it was dead.. I didn't know where it was from, i asked a specialist and for him everything was ok and said i was maybe a bit tired or stressed.
-Noticed that everytime i fapped i felt really really weird, weird look into my eyes, social anxiety even with familly (not really good for confidence),
-Acting like i always had something to hide, on my phone, laptop, creepy as hell, can understand that a girl can't live with a "man" like this,
-Impact on real sexual life, i had a real sexy girlfriend ( behavior is an other story), but i didn't want to fuck her sometimes, because i felt tired eveytime. Faping before she visits me.. what a shame,
- This is serious, it's killing your energy as well, as intellectual abilities (memory), i can sense it right now and it's obvious,
-Getting more time to get busy for real stuff (you can't imagine all the things you can do in One hour instead of looking for a video that suit to whipe)

Now i feel great, no superpower but anxiety is mostly gone. I feel like a normal person and most important, i feel like i evolve as a man.

But the thing is i don't think 90 days is enough, i don't have intense urges or erections as i had in the past before or at the beginning of my porn comsuption. At 29 yo I'm not that old right ?
So i stopped Porn, stopped masturbation and didn't O neither. But i admit it happens to me to fantasize about some girls and thinking about actions with them, is that bad ? i guess yeah so i will try to avoid this kind of thoughts and pursue my quest for as long as i can.

Honestly it was hard maybe for three weeks, then kind of easy when you get busy enough to don't think about it. Just think about why you decided to stop.

Since a week i start to have sexual dreams,the first was so real ! When i woke up i was pretty sure i had an orgasm but did'nt. The second two days ago i was clearly doing my mattress unconsciously ahahah, i woke up and stopped before the mistake. Did this happen to you ?

Also I made few comittments last year such as "try" to keep exercising regularly, eat helathy, stop fapping, work harder, leaving parents to live by myself, waste less time on facebook. So i did complete four of this goals. This year i'll try to succeed on others

Good luck to you guys.

 

True words buddy.. There is things you can't notice for a so short period of investment, but you know there's so much more to gain. About inner confidence it's hard to explain, but when you fap you know deeply inside of you this ain't the right thing to do. Having a normal life with all this displaying in your mind, just not possible. I don't know about happiness, i don't feel the euphoria at a level as high as in the first weeks but on the other side i can't remember the last time i felt depressed.. and i was often before. Maybe the fact that i accepted loneliness, celibate and some others facts to focus on positivity helped.

 

Thank you for that post my friend it's giving me hope really. Anytime it will take to get this fixed i'll stick to it i'm too far now to give up. Also on your side even if you relapsed this happened to me a lot before i really understand that i have no choice, it can't be a "maybe" it will and at that very moment in your head you'll know you're doing good. The question is how will we react when we will be healed and feel strong urges ? curiosity is a good reason as well good luck bro !

 

Thanks mate ! Exactly, fight against this and i swear you'll feel wayyy better in your head. It's not about chick magnet and stuff (i would love it if it was real and that simple) it's about you, you feel better as a real man growing > people see you as a strong person mentally and happy (girls as well) and everything gets easier and easier i'm pretty sure about it. It all come from deep inside of us.

My own 4 rules:
-Get busy (try to invest free time to improve maybe your life, your image of yourself with sport, socialize, study) all of this is helpfull, in my case i had not much time because of work, studies and working in the place i'll live very soon, this helped so much,
-Ask yourself why you're doing it and why you shouldn't, is it possible for you to live like that for the rest of your life (and we both know really well it's not a man behavior),
-Envision yourself as the man you'll be by going through this. A confident man, with high testosterone, who know what he wants and probably good into bed with girls, not only this but all the advantages it's implying.. good health..,
-Think about everything positively, "it seems like a long way from where I stand" > "No matter where i stand i know this has to be that way, it will take time but i'll get to it",
(i red a book pretty good on positivity and affirmations, hal elrod "the miracle morning" it's inspiring)

Don't take this as a lesson i'm just trying to help by giving you my vision about all of this, there's probably more experienced men in here I hope sincerely it will help anyway. And sorry for my english Good luck

 

Thanks guys for support it feels good. I wish you to reach your goals as well.

 

Thanks for sharing my friend, i couldn't look up to your story because i don't have internet in my new home yet but i will for sure. Aren't you french by the way ? Your definition of "being a man" is actually very true and is what i want to be really close in the futur. But as you said there's a loooong way to go, it's far from just avoid PMO, it's about acceptance, confidence and working hard to feel "complete".
All of this combined with good habits for health, wealth and social (friends, girlfriends), that is the way to full happiness in my opinion.
This is what i whish to all of you.

I think a LOT about all of this, and i insist of this very important rule:
-Get yourself busy !

In my case when i had strictly nothing to do (this is what i thought but it's actually never the case, you always have studies, workout, or tasks at home waiting for you to move) i was usually ending up sitting and falling into my thoughts. And verryyy quickly you think about girls => sex => and you know then it's game over. Think about this.

Many thanks again to all for support, thanks taqwa for advices i wasn't sure about the way i acted. Good luck to all of you.