90 days. Back in the zone.

Back where I knew I could be.

Feeling happiness again.
Controlling weight.
Less moody.
But most of all at peace with myself.

This is something I never predicted. It seemed my pmo obsession robbed me of he ability to like myself. I was wracked with guilt and shame and feelings of inadequacy. About 60 days in to this streak I started to notice clearly that I was less anxious about what I "Should" be and more about just "be".

It's a very welcoming feeling of peace.

I wish you and I all the best.

 

Keep going mate, you can win this.

 

So. Back to square 1. How the mighty has fallen. Stress of a house move and other weak excuses lost me my battle and over the past few weeks instagram lead to porn lead to the same old behaviour and results in me slipping from grace.

 

Thanks all, a week in and my mind set is clear.

I honestly believe that I got complacent and thought I could do this without nofap.

The act of checking in here every few days keeps me focused and reminds me about the reason for not lapsing.

Once I post and open up about my feelings or struggle it's kind of like taking a pledge to this fine community to keep clean.

You lot are the best. Thanks.

BTW keep going.

 

2 weeks in. Temptation is there but im still winning.

I ordered an Android tv box for the tv in the study and I can't say the opportunity to find some P on it wasn't strong. But. As I have managed to keep the nofap ethos strong in my mind I managed to visualise the temptation away.

This is what works for me. It may help you. I visualise a hungry green monster sat on my shoulder. He is smelly and panting and desperate to fap. The more you feed it with P the stronger it gets. As you resist and starve it of its lifeforce it gets weaker and fades away.

When temptation gets strong, say for example you've seen something on tv or had a P flashback then just visualise starving the green monster for a few seconds as it fades away and disappears. As you do your desire to fap disapates with it.

Keep strong brethren.

 

Well, nocturnal emissions last night have brought temptation rushing to the front of my mind today. It seems my libido is bouncing back after 3 weeks.

I will resist, but it got me thinking, waaay back in 2014 when I started this journey my original flat line was 2 and a bit months.

Do you think such a thing as a mini flat line exists for people who have relapsed for a month or so after half a year of good behaviour?

 

Almost halfway there, woke with a hangover today and the feelings to fap were strong. But a bit of mental perseverance kept me pmo free.

Last week had sex with the missus, no sign of chaser effect I've read about. But during the last times ive abstained I'd always been hard mode before this time.