Сhecking out girls

It is not healthy to constantly see others as sex objects. This is part of porn conditioning, and must be overcome. It isn't an automatic thing, either. It takes effort. When your mind starts to do this, shut it down, look away and put something else in there to stop the image returning.

 

You have there 2 groups of people: one who think it is no okey and second one who consider it normal man's behavior. I belong to the latter, I am checking out girls all the time and I really hope that NoFap won't change that.
Actually; when I walking on the streets most woman are also checking me out (handsome, gym-built, confident) so I don't understand why women could do it and I somehow shouldn't.

 

Both men and women check out others. It's normal to notice someone that is attractive at a quick glance. It is not normal to look at everyone as a sexual object. That is the difference. Humans should not be viewed as a sexual thing, and assume you have the right to decide whether or not you would or would not have sex with them. You are not entitled to that kind of power and they are not around for you to do what you want to them. That is what porn does to the mind, it changes your thinking to an entitlement that you have that right to choose what you would do with them. Try to view women as a person with feelings, emotions, and worthy of a loving relationship rather than a sexual.objext that you can pounce on. The porn brainwashes you to think the way you do right now, and should try to conquer over that faulty thinking so you can have a wonderful relationship one day

 

@MsPants

You are spot on.

And actually, It will come through if you think about sex...

//

On the other hand it is a bit unfair to us guys.

I mean girls do it really hard for guys when they dress like they do...

And do not even get me started on "but I want to look nice just for guys I do like... ".

Time to raise a bar...
//

@reboot_in_progress

Hello Mate,

There is some truth to that. You perception shifts a bit and your taste changes...

In my case, I was more looking on the character (after 110-120+).

 

Even I am having the same problem, especially when I do my running Its difficult since P has made our brains like that and its going to take some time to rewire. I check out girls usually when I am in public places but when I am alone watching a movie and some hot scene pops up, I will look away or stop watching it/switch off the movie. I think its ok to peek a little bit in public places and make sure you don't carry that memory with you when you are alone. This is how I manage my urges !!

 

@tyler007 I understand what you are saying in a way, but this is a social misconception that women are at fault for how a man perceives them. It takes blame off of men for "not having any control" which is part of the faulty thinking that must be changed in society, but also individually. It is not a womans fault that you cannot control yourself so to speak, it is your fault. You have to think that all women do not get up in the morning to dress for you everyday. They dress for themselves. The huge ego that porn has created has to be controlled. Start thinking about how you are thinking ratger than blaming it on random women. Take control of yourself. It really is unfair that women have to change their attire just in case a man might get turned on, they do not have control over that. And to be honest, covering up doesn't always get rid of a man lusting over us anyway. What then? Should we now hide our faces too? Just think about how to change your thinking.l, distract yourself, look away, and remember they are not wearing certain attire for your sexual desires. It will help you when you do come across someone that may be dressed in a way that you react to.

 

The devil is in the dosage... Attempting to eye-hump everyone within your field of vision isn't healthy, but averting your eyes and mentally pretending there isn't an attractive person in front of you isn't all that great, either.

Take a brief look if you feel the need, acknowledge that they are attractive, and move on... Spending more energy on it -- whether through fixation or avoidance -- will just wear down your willpower after a while.

Just my two-cents...

 

Well put!

 

@MsPants

I think you misunderstood me.

I think that everybody is responsible for their actions/self-control. (full stop)

I am not trying to blame anyone.

What I am saying is that every girl/woman has more to offer than just their looks. It seems to me that many girls (as I am getting more and more mature) think that the looks is everything.

The truth is that people react to what other people are wearing.

The other day, I was in the posh vine bar with a friend.

We have ended up with two hot girls in cheap night robes. Basically one could see almost everything. So, dress like that and you will be considered cheap/easy.

And Yep, guys will look. (it is kinda purpose of that dress)

On the other hand, if you will dress decently, other qualities will pop up first.

//

Last thing: I am from Czech Republic (as this may be cultural thing...)

 

I feel you man, Im on day 85 right now first attempt cold turkey after 25 years! This is torture , I never seen so many women around me in one time in years! i dont think they are interested in me..just noticed there are more women near me than before 85 days ago..some of these females..i was thinking exactly the same as you...it sucked lol its very embarrassing..these are my co-workers lol i cant be thinking like that..